Educator Mr. Cai Yuanpei once said: \”Family is the first school in life. The character of a lifetime, the so-called ever-changing character, is probably embryonic in the family.\” What kind of soil will produce what kind of flowers. Every outstanding child is not born out of nowhere, but comes from his family and his parents. To educate a child well, parents should understand these 8 maxims to educate their children, which can benefit the child throughout his life. Good habits are not in front of the TV but in books. Suhomlinsky said: \”If a person has not experienced the exciting joy of thinking deeply in front of books in his childhood, it is difficult to imagine that there will be a complete education. .\” However, as parents become increasingly busy in work and life, more and more children are spending time with TV all day long, and reading has become optional. A follow-up study found that children who often watch TV before the age of 3 are likely to have problems concentrating by the time they are 7 years old. Those children who enjoy reading have reading levels and cognitive abilities that are even 13 times higher than those of children of the same age, and they often have good moral character and sound personalities as adults. The study also shows that parents are their children\’s truly important reading role models, and the improvement of children\’s reading attitudes largely depends on their parents\’ reading attitudes. It is better to give children a good habit of reading than to give them gold and silver. There are many things that the eyes cannot see, but words can; footsteps cannot measure, but words can; the body cannot reach, but words can. Children who love reading may not be the same, but they will definitely be different: their eyes will be more sparkling, their minds will have more question marks, their actions will be more calm, and their hearts will be softer and fuller. … Letting children fall in love with reading is the most cost-effective educational investment in a parent’s life. How to Improve Emotional Intelligence Education Piglet and Elephant Picture Book Elephant and Piggie, 25 volumes in total PDF + reading package + video + audio It is more important to help children find the right direction than to just let them work hard. Psychologists have done an experiment: divide students into three groups. Head to the village 10 kilometers away. The students in Group A didn\’t know how far the village was, so they just followed the road. After walking only two or three kilometers, some people complained, became depressed and started to scatter, and finally collapsed. The students in Group B knew that they were 10 kilometers away from their destination, but there were no road signs in the middle. They had no idea how far they had gone and how far they were left. They walked less than halfway I kept complaining and the speed became slower and slower. Students in Group C not only knew the distance, but also saw street signs with remaining mileage from time to time. As a result, they were in high spirits throughout the journey and no one complained. The results of the experiment are obvious: Group C is the fastest, Group B is second, and Group A is the slowest. The same is true for education. What kind of person do you want your child to become? You must first find the right goal instead of blindly chasing away. Yang Dongping, director of the 21st Century Education Research Institute, said: \”Many parents only know about scores and rankings. In fact, today\’s competition is not about \’fighting for the first\’, but \’finding the only one\’ and finding the direction and advantages that truly belong to the child.\” Compared with hard work, More importantly, run in the right direction. If you go in the right direction, you won\’t have to worry about the distance. Don’t clip your children’s wings and complain that they can’t fly. Malaguz, the founder of Reggio Preschool, wrote a poem: “AA child has a hundred possibilities, a hundred languages, a hundred hands, a hundred ideas, a hundred worlds…but ninety-nine were stolen; they told the children, don\’t use your hands, just think; don\’t use your brain. , Just act; listen, don’t talk, and understand without pleasure…\” CCTV\’s \”Psychological Interview\” interviewed a female college student who has been living at home for 10 years. Growing up, her mother restricted her from any extracurricular hobbies. When she became interested in something, her mother\’s words: \”If you can achieve something, a dog can achieve something,\” she stopped. She finally grew up to be what her mother said, but her mother cried bitterly and accused her of not knowing. To make progress. Replace, hinder, attack, control… How many parents have cut off their children\’s wings, but blame them for not being able to fly. We often think that our love for our children is completely 100%, and all the giving and correction, It\’s all for the good of the child. As everyone knows, true love is a kind of inaction. It has no requirements, does not cast any shadow of fear, and does not hide any attempt to control. It is the sun, only emitting light and heat, allowing the child to grow on his own When the wings are full, they will help him soar thousands of miles. Doting is the most dangerous education. If you want to destroy a child, what is the most direct and effective way? The answer is doting. Writer Li Yueliang said: \”A doted child, his Happiness is likely to be limited to childhood. \”The \”prodigy\” Wei Yongkang was admitted to a key university at the age of 13. He was dismissed by the Chinese Academy of Sciences at the age of 20 because he could not take care of himself. It was his mother\’s spoiling that turned the proud son into an outcast of the school. \”The evil boy\” Sun Xiaoguo was cruel and cruel since childhood. , he has committed countless heinous crimes in the past 20 years, and it was his parents\’ protection and connivance that pushed him step by step into the bottomless abyss of crime. As the saying goes, spoiling a child is like killing a child. Doting is not love, but the deepest harm to children. . Over-protective love is a \”painless amputation\”, which cruelly cuts off a child\’s ability to become self-reliant in the name of love; love that is always protective is a chronic poison that may appear to be giving, but it will lay a fatal foundation for the child\’s future life. Hidden dangers. Love is an invincible armor for children\’s growth, but doting is not. Unconditional love and conditional principles are the best education parents can give their children. If you blindly blame children for being addicted to mobile phones, it is better to reflect on yourself first. More and more people around us Many children are addicted to mobile games, short videos, and even immersed in social networks. Over time, mobile phones have become a wall between parents and children, and the parent-child relationship is often turned against each other because of a mobile phone. However, When we blindly accuse our children of being addicted to mobile phones, we forget that we are the fundamental source. Some media once surveyed 200 families of primary school students, and the results showed that 45% of parents spend more time playing with mobile phones than with their children; As many as 48%, nearly half, of parents use mobile phones when spending time with their children. A mother online said: \”The child doesn\’t listen to us, he imitates us.\” \”You are looking at your mobile phone, and your children are looking at you. Behind every child who is addicted to mobile phones, there are parents who are adding fuel to the fire. Do you still remember Wu Yishu, the \”national genius\”? From the time she entered kindergarten, her parents turned off their mobile phones at 4:30 pm every day , taking my daughter to study,Painting, playing \”Poetry Solitaire\”, and role-playing the plots of famous novels. Bai Yansong once said: \”Parents who play mahjong cannot raise motivated children.\” Similarly, parents who are addicted to the world of mobile phones cannot raise children who love to read. As a parent, you should reflect on yourself. Whatever kind of person you want your child to be, you should first become that kind of person. When the father is absent, what is painful is that the mother hurts the child. As the old saying goes, \”It is the father\’s fault if he does not educate his children.\” However, in this era, there seems to be an increasing lack of \”father\’s education\”. Survey data shows that 60% of mothers are the absolute main force in family education, fathers play a leading role in no more than 15%, and parents share educational responsibilities less than one-third. Parenting is not easy, but what holds up most of the sky is the solo effort of most mothers. It is precisely because of this that my mother\’s anxiety is increasing day by day. And this anxiety will all be projected onto the child, turning it into an airtight net, making the child like a trapped animal, full of depression, struggle, violence and disguise. Absent fathers, anxious mothers, raise out-of-control children. The same goes for Wu Yifan, who went from being a top student to a prisoner, and the same goes for Wu Xieyu, who went from being a top student to a matricide murderer. Painter Liu Yong once said: \”Many fathers have no hands in their children\’s drawings. Why? Because in the children\’s memory, fathers are like a shadow that can never be grasped.\” Many families look complete, but in the eyes of their children, they are like a shadow. Dad\’s outline is still blurry. The book \”The Art of Love\” writes: \”Mother represents nature, the earth and the ocean, and is our hometown; father represents the world of ideas, law and order.\” Good education is not a one-man effort, but a collaborative effort between parents. The \”collusion\” of love: the mother provides the child with emotional needs and tenderness, and the father teaches the child rational thinking and power structure, each in its own place and performing its duties. This kind of nurturing is the highest level of nourishment. There are many paths to success, and you don’t have to let your children take the crowded path. There is a question on Zhihu: “What does it feel like to be successful in the eyes of your parents?” The most favorable answer is: Safety is the first lesson of school. Educational content Lebi Youyou\’s complete collection of popular science knowledge, 52 episodes in total: \”Get first in the exam, be a key point in college, have an annual salary of millions, marry a fair and beautiful wife, marry a tall, rich and handsome man, be as glorious as a tower in front of others, and as miserable as sand behind others, live a successful life You lose the face of your parents, relatives and friends, but you cannot live a calm and calm life.\” The greatest sorrow of parents is that all your plans for your children are in vain in the end. What you see as “success and fame” may not be the success that your children recognize and like in their hearts. A child\’s life is his own, and the meaning of a child\’s life should be defined by him. The famous American golf star Jim Furyk once said: \”When I was a child, many people thought I would accomplish nothing, but my grandmother discovered my talent in sports. Success is like everyone rushing to the same destination. If they all rush There are too many people in the subway, and it may take a long time to find your own place. Even if you arrive, you can only stand far behind others. Since it is just a process, why don’t we choose other ways? In many cases, walking only requires a few turns. You can get ahead by making a bend.\” There are millions of paths to success, and not everyone has to make the same choice. Only the one that is most suitable for the child will work.Towards real success. Raising children, haste makes waste, and being too hasty will only be counterproductive. Raising children is a process of waiting for the flowers to bloom. Some parents go too hasty on this road. Psychological research has found that parents with high anxiety are prone to over-parenting behaviors: they will use an almost suffocating method to over-involve themselves in their children\’s lives, control, kidnap, and forcibly transform their children\’s lives according to their own wishes; Such children may seem to love their parents more and be better in a short period of time, but when they grow up, they will develop various behavioral and psychological problems. When climbing, you should take the middle path calmly and climb up the stairs step by step. The same goes for education, haste makes waste. Remember the little girl who sang \”Five-Star Red Flag\” at the Olympic Games? Her name was Lin Miaoke and she was 9 years old at the time. Thirteen years have passed, but the girl who made the whole world applauded failed to improve herself down-to-earth because her mother was eager for her to \”succeed\”, and she eventually ended up \”hurting Zhongyong\” from being the proud daughter of heaven. Hei Xiaolong, who sent all four \”bad kids\” to prestigious universities, once said: \”It is easy for parents to think that there is no hope for their children with poor academic performance. In fact, if they are raised slowly, such children may be Better. Don\’t draw conclusions about your child\’s life now. Children should be educated slowly, give them more space, and let them slowly draw their own blueprint for life.\” Every child has his or her own flowering period. Waiting for a flower to bloom, you must be able to endure the loneliness in the middle, withstand temptations from time to time, and withstand temporary blows. Growing up requires traveling through mountains and rivers. The road ahead is long, so we will walk slowly with our children. There is a sentence in the documentary \”Mirror\”: \”Every child is born with a blank piece of paper, and the parents are the ones who paint the picture. What the blank paper becomes depends on the parents.\” No one is born with perfect parents, but we They are both parents who are constantly perfecting their “painting skills”. Parenting is like a river, with its ups and downs and many hidden reefs. Recommended classic book: The main content of the Education of Love pdf + audio: Crossing the river by feeling the stones, every step is difficult, but every step contains joy.