How parents lead their children to grow up

With the changes and implementation of my country\’s family planning policy in recent years, the \”multi-child era\” is accelerating. Paying attention to and supporting families with multiple children and providing good family education is not only related to boosting the confidence and willingness of couples of childbearing age, but also related to the healthy growth of the next generation and the happiness of thousands of families. The author believes that we can start from the following aspects to improve the scientificity and effectiveness of family education for families with multiple children. Parents need more rationality and division of labor. Compared with single-child families, multi-child families have the characteristics of more complex family structures and higher family upbringing costs. Parents often need to spend more time and energy to balance work and family, adjust family interpersonal relationships, and handle family affairs well. Conflicts between children, etc., cause some parents in multi-child families to easily feel \”inadequate\” and unable to better pay attention to the needs of each child. Research shows that families with multiple children are more likely to adopt an authoritarian parenting style than families with one child. When parents cannot cope with the situation, they are prone to directly make demands on their children or use coercive methods such as orders. Educators in families with multiple children should realize that in family education, they must not only establish necessary rules for their children and guide their growth in a scientific and rational way, but also have more patience, control their emotions, and actively use dialogue. Resolve conflicts among family members and create a harmonious family atmosphere through consultation, negotiation and other methods. On the other hand, parents should not put too much pressure on themselves, learn to accept their own imperfections, and do not create too much pressure by being demanding on themselves. In most Chinese families, mothers are often more involved in their children\’s upbringing than fathers, and they are mainly concentrated in time-consuming and labor-intensive specific matters such as daily life, nutritious meals, and homework guidance. Taking care of one child takes a lot of effort, and taking care of multiple children will invisibly increase the pressure on mothers to raise children. Families with multiple children require close cooperation and a reasonable division of labor between parents. Fathers should be more actively involved in childcare activities, negotiate with mothers, and share their burdens with each other. This will not only help the children feel sufficient fatherly love, but also It is helpful to relieve mothers’ parenting pressure and improve marital satisfaction and family happiness. CCTV recommends more than 500 high-scoring documentaries. Children will watch it and become addicted to self-discipline and focus on creating a harmonious sibling relationship. One of the distinguishing features of multi-child families that differs from single-child families is that as the number of children in the family increases, interaction and communication between siblings will be more conducive to the development of each child\’s social and emotional functions. However, how to build a harmonious sibling relationship? Giving full play to the positive influence among peer groups has also become an important issue in education for families with multiple children. Parents in multi-child families need to learn more about the physical and mental characteristics and needs of children of different ages, and find ways to create a harmonious sibling relationship among their children. On the one hand, parents can guide their eldest children to play an active role in sibling relationships, face up to the changes in the eldest child\’s family role and status, relieve the eldest child\’s mental pressure and loss caused by changes in family structure and the increase in the number of younger siblings, and help the eldest child live smoothly. Go through the psychological adjustment period. On the other hand, the methods of role modeling, emotional cultivation, appreciation and motivation, etc. should be scientifically used to help children correctly understand the \”role of compatriots\” and \”eldest child\”.The importance of \”role\” guides the eldest child to actively participate in the parenting activities of taking care of younger siblings, gain a sense of accomplishment in helping younger siblings, and enhance the sense of responsibility as the eldest child. At the same time, it guides younger children to learn to care and love the eldest child, and promotes the generation of harmonious sibling relationships. . In addition, in some families with many children, parents sometimes may not be able to be absolutely fair to each child and cannot achieve an absolutely even distribution of resources, so they should take the initiative to explain and guide their children to understand with a candid attitude. Parents also understand each other, thereby avoiding rifts between family members and establishing healthy parent-child and sibling relationships. Try to avoid the influence of marginal effects. The marginal effect theory proposed by American sociologist Homans shows that when people yearn for something When investing in emotions, people’s emotions are strongest when they experience things for the first time, but as the frequency of contact with things increases, the emotional experience will gradually fade. In a single-child family, since there is only one child, both parents and grandparents will give It pays full attention and care to meet the needs of children at all stages of growth as much as possible, and has sufficient enthusiasm and expectations for children\’s growth and success. However, in multi-child families, with the arrival of the second child or even more children, The emotional experiences such as the sense of accomplishment and novelty that parents get from their children born later will gradually fade. Coupled with the influence of busy work and family affairs and other factors, they often unconsciously reduce their attention to their children. In families with many children Parents should change their understanding and realize that raising multiple children is their own responsibility and responsibility. They should also realize that raising children is a rich life experience and a precious opportunity to improve their own personality and achieve self-growth. In families with many children Parents can also continue to discover and feel the joy of parenting through multiple experiences of being parents, treat the growth of each child with a responsible attitude, consciously improve their own abilities in observation, communication, empathy, etc., and avoid avoiding problems to the greatest extent. The impact of marginal effects on raising children. Reasonable use of time and resources. In multi-child families, as the number of children increases and the cost of raising children increases, the psychological resources consumed by caregivers also increase. Compared with single-child families, multi-child families Parents in the family need to learn to plan their time reasonably, be good at leaving work and life time \”blank\”, and give greater flexibility to work and family life arrangements, so that they can cope with various challenges more calmly and avoid being overwhelmed by life pressure or work and family life. Parenting conflicts and other conflicts create a long-term sense of anxiety and urgency; focus on systematic learning of scientific knowledge and methods about family education, improve the concepts and levels of family education, and deal with the parenting issues of multiple children in an orderly manner, gaining stronger results. Self-efficacy improves the confidence and courage to overcome family education problems. Parents in multi-child families can also fully mobilize the human and interpersonal resources around them, and seek help from family, friends, colleagues and other social support forces when necessary, which will also be beneficial Improve the quality and efficiency of family education.