The stupid mother is scolding \”forced sharing\”, but the smart mother secretly teaches her children the virtue of \”sharing\”

Sharing is a good thing. Responsible parents should teach their children to tell you something: When I was a graduate student, I had to observe an internship in a kindergarten. I had nothing to do at noon, so I chatted with the kindergarten teachers. My common feeling with the teacher is that although the children are only over three years old, their abilities are already different from those of the same class. Some children are more selfish and overbearing, unwilling to give even a little to other children. However, some children have developed surprisingly good characters. They generously share things in their hands with other children, which is heart-warming. Kindergarten teachers are also human beings. Although they try to treat every child equally, they cannot help but give more guidance and praise to those children who are virtuous and know how to share. I observed that these children who can share exude a \”little leader\” temperament, and children like to surround them. Coupled with the special encouragement given by their teachers, it is very likely that these children will also be winners in future interpersonal interactions. This shows that it is a good thing for children to develop the quality of \”loving sharing\” after they are 3 years old. Regrettably, nowadays, parenting articles are either full of chicken soup if they disagree with each other, or they directly refer to chapters one, two, three, four and five of parenting books. The more I watch, the more I get drunk. Or, the political correctness of \”cannot force children to share\” can be seen everywhere, and chicken soup articles can tell the end after reading the beginning, but there are few detailed and feasible steps to guide parents on how to cultivate them. Parents have a lot of questions in their minds, but they don’t know where to start teaching their children, and they don’t know the reason why their children “don’t share”. It’s time to stop selling chicken soup! The steps and guidelines for cultivating \”sharing\” are as follows. Maodou Mama provides you with a one-stop service \”from explanation to learning\”. A child with a normal mind will develop the virtue and habit of sharing in about half a month to a month by following these steps. There are a total of five steps and one note, which are interlocking. Each step is a prerequisite for the next step. It is very strict and operable. Step 1: Teach children to understand the meaning of \”sharing\”. The word \”sharing\” is an abstract concept that cannot be seen, touched or tasted. For children, it is far less understandable than actual visible things such as \”red apples\”, \”round steamed buns\”, and \”mom and dad\”. The reason why your child doesn\’t share may be that he doesn\’t understand what you are saying. Let’s use an analogy. It\’s as if the leader said to you: \”Xiao Li, help me do this: use the Greek letter Ψ to represent it, and use it to describe the quantum behavior of particles.\” Since the child cannot understand, it is even less likely to follow what you say. Do. No matter what you want to teach your children, it is important that they understand it first. Therefore, the first step is: let the children know what the concept of \”sharing\” means through practical demonstration at home. When eating fruit, cut the fruit in half, hand it to the child, and say: \”Mom, share half an apple with you.\” Take out a picture book and show it to the child, and say: \”Mom, share this book with the baby.\” Let’s go!” While eating, give your husband a chopstick of his favorite dish and say to your child: “Share the delicious food with daddy.” After you have done enough of these steps, let him express in words what sharing is. Only by saying it does it mean that he really knows how to do it. Watching cartoonsWhen you see a sharing scene, ask your child: \”What are they doing?\” If the child says: \”Sharing!\” Well, now you can move on to the next step. Step 2: Share with your family that teaching your children everything is from easy to difficult. Don\’t think about reaching the sky in one step. Cultivating virtues cannot be as easy as installing a mobile app. Install a \”sharing\” function today and a \”self-control\” function tomorrow. Parenting is quite slow. When the child knows what sharing means, the second step is to encourage the child to start by sharing with mom, dad, and family members. When the child gets a few cherries, let him share them with his mother. When a child has a few balloons in his hand, let him share them with his father. There is a delicious cake today, let him try it for grandma. When the child is ready to share with his family, start the next step. Step 3: Find a mixed-age play environment for your children. Children’s interactions are essentially a way to gain experience points. The longer you hang out with your friends and the more people you interact with, the stronger your child\’s social skills will be. You only envy some children who are \”willing to share\”. You must not have seen those children with sufficient experience in getting along with their peers, who often play until they refuse to go home. Those children who go home after kindergarten rarely develop the virtue of \”sharing\”. If you don’t even have a companion, who can you learn to share from? Even if you learn it, you will have forgotten it long ago without repeated practical exercises. This is like a person who rows on the shore and will never learn to swim. Children\’s social interaction is actually practiced, not taught! When I wrote the article \”My child was bullied, but his behavior shocked all parents\”, some mothers questioned: Can such a young child learn a complete set of procedures for dealing with bullying? I said: Maodou gets out of kindergarten at 5 o\’clock every day, and doesn\’t go home until 7:30 after playing with his friends of mixed ages. On weekends, he hangs out with his friends of mixed ages all day long. With such a long period of practical practice, what communication skills cannot be practiced? He has thousands of opportunities to practice \”sharing\” with children. △The one wearing gray clothes in the middle of the picture is Edamame. Every day Edamame does not play until dark and does not go home. It is very important to find a suitable group of mixed-age playmates for the children, and every mother must do it well! It is recommended to start looking from the community. After finding a mixed-age play environment, \”sharing\” learning can proceed to the next step. Step 4: Start sharing with your friends. Now that the child can share at home and has friends of mixed ages, the fourth step is: Mom designates a friend who has good tutoring, knows how to share, and is preferably older than your child, and let your child take the initiative to share with him once. After sharing with such a small partner, children will realize the practical benefits of sharing. This kind of actual benefit may be the sharing partner sharing his own things with him, or the mother\’s verbal praise: \”You shared it with others today, that\’s great!\” In short, the child will taste the benefits and get better with positive reinforcement. Lai Yue likes to share. Because any behavior that is positively reinforced will generally occur repeatedly. The first time a child shares with an outsider is very important! If successful, it will greatly stimulate his desire to share. If the child is unwilling to share it with him, find someone else. Step 5: Share, start sharing things that children don’t like, start with things that children don’t like, and go from simple to difficult. When you go out to play, bring more toys. In addition to the ones he likes, you should also bring some that he has no interest in. Children like cars the most, so let him start by sharing building blocks. Don’t expect your child to share his or her favorite toy all at once. Only when you have enough food and clothing can you show love to others. Don\’t go against human nature. Mom needs to provide more guidance outside. When you guide \”share with other children\” and he doesn\’t resist much, it\’s almost done. [After all the steps are completed, you will have a child who loves to share] [Note] If you are not old enough, there is no need to force it: the basis for children\’s communication is their ability to understand and express. Can\’t understand? All right. To put it in human terms: \”Only when children can understand what they hear and speak out can they play with their friends.\” So: when a child can only speak a single word from his mouth and cannot speak short sentences; when a child just has Awareness of property rights, when pointing to things and saying \”mine, mine\”; when children are in the rebellious period of terrible 2, saying: no, no, no every day, there is no need to teach children to share at this time. Teaching is in vain. Around the time your child enters kindergarten, this is the best time to teach him to share. Don’t miss this opportunity, just follow the above steps one by one and practice! Don\’t reverse the order. Those who progress slowly need to return to the previous step and repeat the exercise. Those who progress quickly can skip to the next step. If the child\’s receptive ability is weak, practice a certain step for a longer time to consolidate and consolidate it. Of course, don\’t go against your child\’s wishes, that is, don\’t be impatient. Follow these steps and one day he will love to share. None of the children\’s virtues can be learned by reading chicken soup articles, but can be learned step by step.