Children who love to talk back have four obvious advantages and are often more promising when they grow up.

Before we dive into today’s topic, I would like to ask you a few questions: “Do your children like to talk back? Do you hate talking back? How do you deal with children who talk back?” To be honest, when my daughter first learned to talk back to me, I was very unhappy. I even felt that her behavior was a lack of education, and I tried to forcefully correct her behavior. Because in traditional educational perceptions, especially among the older generation, children talking back to their elders is often a sign of being impolite and disrespecting their elders. However, with the passage of time and the accumulation of parenting experience, especially after reading many books on family education and parenting, I discovered that it turns out that it is a good thing for children to \”talk back\”. 01 Why is it a good thing for children to “talk back”? ① Talking back is a sign of children’s awakening of self-awareness. As a parent, as long as you observe carefully you will find that most of the children who love talking back in life are in the following three age groups. 1) The budding period of self-awareness between the ages of 2 and 5. Children in this period like to talk back to their parents through language such as \”no\” and \”no\”. 2) At this stage, quasi-adult children aged 7 to 9 are often dissatisfied with various rules of the outside world, and sometimes even a little unreasonable; 3) During adolescence aged 12 to 15, they begin to pursue independence and independence, and hate all constraints and Discipline may lead to a tendency to talk back, or a lack of communication and expression. It can be seen that talking back is actually a normal manifestation of children\’s awakening of self-awareness as they grow. Children who don\’t like to talk back may, to a certain extent, show that their development of self-expression and self-awareness is relatively lagging behind. ② Children who talk back are more independent and confident. Princeton University in the United States has conducted detailed observation research to study the relationship between children\’s personality development and future abilities. The results found that children who like to talk back between the ages of 2 and 5 will show stronger abilities to independently analyze, judge things and make decisions as they grow up in the future; while those children who are more obedient will When they grow up, their independence and judgment are relatively weak, and they are more dependent on others. Children who like to talk back usually do not blindly follow other people\’s opinions, have their own opinions, are willing to seek truth or reach consensus through dialogue and debate, and show strong independence and self-confidence, which are key factors for children\’s growth and progress. . In contrast, those children who don\’t like to talk back tend to be more introverted and submissive. They lack certain opinions and independent thinking abilities, and rely more on the opinions and suggestions of others. When facing problems, they often lack confidence and courage and dare not express their opinions, thus missing opportunities for growth and progress. ③ Children who love to talk back are better at communication and expression. German psychologists once pointed out: Children who dare to talk back to their elders have more potential to become successful when they grow up. They dare to express their different opinions, which in itself is a manifestation of social ability. Many great people in history showed a tendency to talk back during their childhood. For example, the famous German philosopher Nietzsche was known for being good at debating and talking back during his childhood. His family was often surprised by his knowledge of various philosophical questionsHe has profound insights and firm stance on the subject. Even in the face of the authority of his elders, he expresses his thoughts without flinching. This trait of talking back in his early years laid a solid foundation for his independent thinking and critical spirit in the field of philosophy in the future. For another example, the American inventor Edison was also a child who loved to talk back during his childhood. He is full of curiosity about the things around him, often asks some seemingly weird but insightful questions, and starts heated debates with his elders. This thirst for knowledge and the spirit of daring to question eventually made him a great inventor and made great contributions to the progress of human society. Through communication and debate with their elders, children who love to talk back not only exercise their language expression and logical thinking skills, but also their ability to cooperate and communicate with others. Therefore, in future study and work, you will often be able to better adapt to various social situations and establish good cooperative relationships with others. In contrast, children who don\’t like to talk back may have certain difficulties in expressing their thoughts and emotions, and lack certain communication skills and expression abilities, which limits their development and achievements to a certain extent. ④ Children who talk back are more innovative and critical thinkers. A survey on children’s thinking styles shows that children who often talk back to their elders score higher on a problem-solving ability test. They can better analyze the nature of problems and come up with original solutions. In addition, the data also shows that these children are more adaptable and can find coping strategies faster when facing new challenges and changes. Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple, showed a strong personality and a tendency to talk back during his childhood. He is skeptical of traditional ideas and technologies and constantly comes up with new ideas and solutions. This way of thinking enabled him to achieve revolutionary breakthroughs in the computer industry and launch a series of innovative products such as personal computers, iPods, and iPhones, which changed the world. Children who love to talk back are often not satisfied with existing rules and concepts, and dare to question and challenge, and put forward their own opinions and solutions. This way of thinking that dares to challenge authority enables them to break out of traditional thinking patterns and find more effective and innovative solutions when facing complex problems. In contrast, those children who do not like to talk back may be more dependent on authority and tradition and lack certain innovative thinking and critical thinking skills. Such children may have a harder time adapting to new challenges and changes and cannot quickly find effective coping strategies, thus limiting their development and achievement. 02 Children “love to talk back”, what should parents do? As parents, we need to make a clear distinction: talking back and making trouble unreasonably are two different things! Being unreasonable is when a child deliberately provokes or takes illogical and unreasonable behavior due to emotional fluctuations without any legitimate reason, regardless of the feelings of others, and even uses inappropriate means such as noise and threats to force others to obey them. This kind of behavior lacks respect and rationality and is intolerable. Talking back means that children dare to express their different opinions or opinions when communicating with elders or authority figures.Opinion, you can make a well-founded refutation of the other party\’s words. Allowing children to talk back does not mean condoning their disrespect. In four simple steps, you can scientifically deal with your child\’s talking back behavior, and your child will become better and better. Step 1: Stay calm and patient. 90% of the time when children talk back to their parents, it is because of their parents’ commanding tone and attitude. Psychologists believe that commanding or negative speaking methods will arouse children\’s resistance. Talking back is a natural part of a child\’s growth and is not a deliberate act of defiance or defiance of authority. In the face of children\’s talking back behavior, if we cannot stay calm and patient, get angry easily or punish the children, it will easily arouse the children\’s resistance. On the contrary, if we can remain calm and patient, listen to our children\’s thoughts, and understand their feelings, then talking back may become a bridge to enhance parent-child relationships and promote parent-child understanding. Step 2: Respect children’s opinions and feelings. Research has found that when parents respect and listen carefully to their children’s opinions, children are more likely to show positive behaviors and emotions, and family relationships are more harmonious. Dialogue between parents and children should be a two-way, equal process. Parents should keep an open mind, listen carefully to their children\’s views, respect their opinions and feelings, and have equal and respectful dialogue with them. Step 3: Teach children the correct way to express themselves. Psychological research shows that effective communication methods can promote individual adaptability and success in society. As parents, if a child likes to talk back, then we should teach him to learn to think from the perspective of others, express his opinions and emotions, and communicate with others with an attitude of respect and understanding, as well as more polite and rational language. Only in this way can children\’s social skills be exercised, so that they can better integrate into society and achieve all-round personal development. Step Four: Set Clear Rules and Boundaries When your child talks back, it’s critical to set clear rules and boundaries. I think this will not only help your children understand what behaviors they can do and what they cannot do, but also learn to respect others and follow the rules. At the same time, rules and boundaries can also cultivate children\’s self-discipline and sense of responsibility, reduce family conflicts, and make the family atmosphere more harmonious. Therefore, when children talk back, parents should guide them patiently, respect their children\’s personalities and needs, and set clear rules and boundaries to help their children grow up healthily. [Final message to parents] The way parents deal with their children\’s talk back determines their children\’s future development and achievements. If parents can adopt an attitude of understanding, guidance and respect to deal with their children\’s back-talking behavior, their children will learn to express themselves rationally, establish a healthy communication model, and lay a solid foundation for future achievement and development. On the other hand, if we are too strict or ignore children\’s back-talking behavior, it may inhibit their self-expression and even cause them to feel frustrated or rebellious, which may eventually lead them astray. Therefore, as parents, we should accept our children\’s talking-back behavior with an open mind, guide them with wisdom and love, and help them grow up healthily and happily.

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