A ninth-grade girl who repeated her studies for 6 years without telling her parents and pretended to be in a prestigious school.

Tang Shangjun, known as the college entrance examination madman, took the college entrance examination 16 times. He had been admitted to the prestigious 985 school many times, but chose to give up and continue to study again. Similar to him, because my family was poor, I was eager to change my destiny through the college entrance examination, so I repeated the exam for 6 years. My name is Yang He, born in 1995 in a rural area of ​​Jiangxi. My parents both have primary school diplomas and work outside all year round. I also have an older brother and a younger brother. The three of us were raised by my grandmother. Although my parents fell in love freely, the difficult life after marriage gradually extinguished the fire of their love, and they grew tired of each other. Even when they go home for the New Year, they still quarrel, fight and even sleep in separate rooms. Dad even has domestic violence tendencies. I also used to hate my parents. I hated that they were unable to have three children and left us all to be raised by my widowed grandma. The child support they received was pitiful. I also hate that they treat me and my brothers and sisters differently. When I was in elementary school, I was the only one in the family who stayed in the countryside to accompany the elderly, while my older brother and younger brother could go to the amusement park in the city with their parents. Therefore, I secretly vowed in my heart that I must change my fate of being ignored. But no matter how hard I try, my results always rank in the middle. Just when I was planning to get married, have children, and raise children without getting into a good university like many rural girls around me, my grandma’s death deeply stimulated me. In the winter of 2012, my grandma, who raised me single-handedly and attended all my parent-teacher conferences and graduation ceremonies, passed away from cervical cancer, which was very painful. After my grandma contracted cervical cancer, she could not be cured and had no money for treatment. A few days before her death, her uncle and others helped her and took her from the hospital to die. We couldn\’t even afford the pain relief, so I watched her vomit blood and die after being tortured for a long time. Before my grandma passed away, she had a rotten woody smell all over her body, and I could smell it every night. I was in my second year of high school at the time, and my grades were below average in the class. I told myself that I wanted to leave here in a glorious way: get into a good university, leave this mired home, and let them know that my grandma’s love for me was reciprocated and that I should not be ignored. Throughout my senior year of high school, I got up early and went to bed late, using question-and-question tactics to numb myself, thinking I was working very hard. The night before the college entrance examination, I had insomnia until midnight. In 2013, at the age of 18, I took the college entrance examination for the first time in my life. When I walked out of the examination room, all the candidates were picked up by their parents, except me. With food and water in hand, they held umbrellas for their precious children. I walked alone and indifferently through the crowd. After the results of the college entrance examination were announced, my score only passed the second line, which was much lower than my predicted score. I was not performing well in the liberal arts that I was good at. After the results came out, I was still in the parent group (I have been my \”parent\” since high school), and I saw a parent saying: \”Girls, just go to a decent university! If you are a boy, you want to repeat your studies.\” It doesn\’t matter how many years it takes, as long as he has the energy to read it.\” After saying that, she added a snickering expression. I am sad and angry: Why? In shame and anger, I made a crazy decision: repeat the study without telling my family! The high school I attended was in a county town in Jiangxi. I had too many acquaintances. If I wanted to hide it from my family, I had to change places. I\’m also afraid that others will say similar things: \”Oh, look at that girl, I thought of repeating it just because my brain was broken. Is this trying to squeeze out the parents? It’s useless, it’s better to go to college quickly, work part-time, and get married! \”I once dreamed of enrolling in a college entrance examination training institution. It is said that their education quality is better, but I was short of money. In the end, I chose to go to a general high school in Nanchang. That summer vacation, my parents did not go home as usual. My brother is out of town and my younger brother is studying in a boarding school. During this gap period, I contacted a school in Nanchang. That school stipulated that students who passed the first grade should repeat the class – all fees are waived and every month. 250 yuan for living expenses. If the score is lower than the first grade, the normal fee will be charged. Our family is a registered poor family. When I was in high school, I received a poverty scholarship of 1,500 yuan every year, which kept me from being stretched. It is a high school education and cannot receive high school poverty scholarships. I stayed in Nanchang for three days, two of which were full-time teaching at the school. Except for one night, I slept in a cheap youth hostel. On the fourth day, I returned home. I first found a photo of the admission notice from a second university far away in Yunnan, printed it out in color, carefully peeled off the name part with tape, and wrote my own name on it. . Then, I took a photo of the notice from a distance. The pixels of my mobile phone were not high enough to see the signs of fraud. I sent the photo to my parents in Guangdong and Zhejiang via MMS, and attached it. The last message: \”Dad, Mom, I have been admitted to this university in Yunnan. I have social practice in advance during the summer vacation. I have to take a train there. Yunnan is too far and it is inconvenient to go back and forth. I will come back this year during the Chinese New Year.\” \”My parents were convinced. Moreover, they didn\’t care much about me in the first place, and there were two other people at home who annoyed them. At that time, my brother, who was four years older than me, had just graduated from a technical school and couldn\’t find a job, which was a headache for my parents. When my younger brother was a junior, he clamored for his parents to buy him a mobile phone. In contrast, all my deceptions were based on taking advantage of their trust in me. It started. I also sent the text message to my brother and brother, because after I left, they were kept in the dark and answered the question. In their eyes, I was a well-behaved and dull nerd. , my parents put a tuition fee into my bank card. I told them that the university would provide a student loan, and they only needed to give me a small amount of money. I couldn’t ask for more because I had no conscience. With my parents\’ money, I saved all the money I had saved during my three years of high school, including my meager New Year\’s money. After that, I anxiously went to Nanchang again to find a summer job. I worked as a waiter in a hotel, and although the salary was not high, it included room and board. Being a waiter was very tiring. I never got off work on time, and I had to keep track of orders, collect dishes, empty the dining cart, pour water, clear tables, and change tables. Taiwan… The hotel is very big. I can\’t handle the area with 50 or 60 people by myself. When I first started working, I would accidentally find no one when I was looking at the list. At this time, I would be taken out by the manager for criticism. : “You need to have a bright mind! \”My hands were burned when I moved the bottom of the pot, my hands were pricked when I opened the wine, my hands were burned when I was carrying heavy and hot soup……In just one month, my hands were no longer in shape. When you are a waiter, it is more common to be criticized. If you serve food slowly, you will be scolded; if you serve food too quickly, you will be scolded if you disrupt the flow of the banquet. In the beginning, I would cry until midnight if a customer said something too clumsy. Later, as my professional skills improved, my ability to withstand stress also improved, and I was able to greet people with a smile every day. The hotel system is formal and there are perfect attendance awards every month. I am energetic and driven, and often work morning and evening shifts, from six o\’clock in the morning to eleven o\’clock in the evening. Later, Aunt Liu, the department manager who often criticized me, praised me: \”Little girls of your age always like to stay in bed and have to put on makeup for a long time before coming to work. I really thought there was a Cinderella story! Or It’s not easy for you to be practical!” So, at the end-of-month summary meeting, I received another bonus. Two months passed during the summer vacation, and I saved up tuition and living expenses. That night when I was counting the small treasury, I laughed and cried. I opened my high school textbook, turned to the first page, and wrote stroke by stroke: \”Yang He, you can do it! You are not afraid of leaving your hometown!\” My parents occasionally They would call to ask about my summer social practice, and I would ask the chef or other waiters in the store to take a photo of me and send it to them, saying that I had learned a lot and asking them not to worry. Aunt Liu, the department manager, is very kind to me, maybe because I am the same age as her daughter and I am very active in work. When she heard that I was working as a study student and saving money to study, she agreed that I would come and work as a temporary worker on the weekends after school started. Temporary workers are not allowed. After school started, time suddenly became tense. I lived in an eight-person dormitory on campus with other senior high school students. They could study peacefully, but I had to work day and night shifts every day. The self-study in the evenings from Monday to Friday ends at 9:30. When they go back to the dormitory to wash up, I have to rush to the hotel to wash the last batch of dishes and return to the dormitory at the closing time of 10:10. I had almost no time to study on weekends. I worked as an after-school teacher at a training institution in the afternoon and evening. Just supervise them not to run around and teach them how to write and do simple calculations. In order to make time, I got up at 5:50 in the morning and went to the classroom to study by myself at 6 o\’clock. In the evening from 10:30 to 12 o\’clock. I am desperate and hopeful at the same time. Even if I only eat breakfast and lunch every day, even if I type my draft paper first with a pencil and then with a black pen… I don\’t regret my choice. In 2014, I took the college entrance examination for the second time in my life. It is 40 points higher than the second one and 5 points behind the first line. I stared at the score blankly and reflected on it for three days and three nights – it was not enough, it was not enough, it was not worthy of my efforts. I continued to go through the high-level reimbursement procedures with ease. I also announced to my family that since I am a sophomore, I will be even busier and will not go back during the Chinese New Year. Although my parents were a little dissatisfied, they didn\’t say much. If I don\’t go back, I can escape all questioning about college life. At 10:30 in the evening on January 30, 2015, I just took a sip of strong coffee and planned to continue fighting an analytic geometry problem. Suddenly, I received a call from my mother: \”Hehe, your brother and I will come to see your school. Your brother is also a sophomore in high school. It\’s time for him to see what college is like! He posted the picture in your circle of friends I’m so envious!”His hands shook, and two words echoed in his mind: finished. At that time, a high school classmate of mine got admitted to the same university in Yunnan that I lied to my parents about. She often posted pictures in WeChat Moments. I stole her picture and even posted a comment about it, setting it up so that only mom, dad, older brothers and younger brothers could see it. From the opening ceremony, military training, to the delicious food in the cafeteria, and staying up late to endorse before the exam, I didn\’t miss anything, as if I was really a college student. I thought darkly, deceiving people and defrauding them of the whole package, sending Buddha to the West. No one knows that behind the photos at the opening ceremony is me staying up until 1:30, and behind the various dishes in the cafeteria are my seven packs of instant noodles with different flavors a week. At noon the next day, I contacted Zhang Yueyue, the female classmate whose pictures I had stolen, on WeChat. She said to her: \”My brother wants to get admitted to your university. Please take me around the school in a few days, and then I will bring my brother here.\” Zhang Yueyue was sunny and enthusiastic, and she agreed to me immediately. At the end of February 2015, I asked for leave from school, took out my frugal money, gritted my teeth and bought a plane ticket to Yunnan. After Zhang Yueyue took me for a walk around the campus, he asked me about my university status. I smiled and said that I was studying history at an inconspicuous second-rate university in the south. At the beginning of March, Yueyue went out for social practice. I pretended to take my mother and brother around the university, and even borrowed Yueyue’s campus card to treat them to meals in the cafeteria. My younger brother looked envious: \”Sister, the university is really good, but you seem to have a lot of study tasks in your major!\” I didn\’t dare to open the schoolbag I was carrying, which was filled with teaching assistants for the third year of high school, so I just said lightly : \”College is not as easy as you think.\” Before leaving, my mother gave me two hundred yuan, saying that I would have better food in college. I looked at the sleeves of the sweater that my mother had washed and had become threadless, and stuffed the money back: \”The scholarship fund is enough, don\’t give me any more.\” The cost of this unexpected trip to Yunnan caused me to chew on it for a month. Cheap bread. But I feel very satisfied, maybe because I got the envy from my younger brother who has always been paid attention to by my family, and I got my mother\’s concern for me. In the summer of 2015, I took the college entrance examination for the third time, and this time I was only 1 point away from the top score. No, I want to read another book. I gritted my teeth and continued reading. During the Spring Festival of 2016, I hurriedly went home to spend the New Year. On New Year\’s Eve, there wasn\’t much food at home. My brother was working overtime in other places and couldn\’t come home. My brother\’s grade in his senior year of high school fell to the bottom. My parents had a big fight over whose responsibility it was. All of a sudden, I returned to Nanchang angrily on the first day of the new year. From September 2015 to April 2016, I suffered from poor appetite, abdominal pain, fullness, and rapid weight loss. At first, I was glad that I could save money on food. It was not until the end of April that I saw my shaky look in the mirror, so I panicked and went to the hospital for a checkup for chronic gastritis. Even so, I was still worried about the money spent on medical treatment. The fourth college entrance examination in 2016 was a life-and-death struggle for me. If I don\’t read another book, I won\’t have any excuse to ask my parents for money, because the excuse of \”four years of college living expenses\” has expired. The night before the college entrance examination, I completely lost sleep. I read the admission ticket over and over again. The first three failed college entrance examinations and deceptions in lifeThe pressure from my family, the questioning looks from teachers and fresh graduates at school all came to mind, swallowing me up like a nightmare and making me sweat in cold sweats all night long. Who would have thought that that summer, I would faint in the English examination room and be rushed to the hospital. I was diagnosed with acute enteritis. The doctor diagnosed that it was caused by eating raw and cold food and overeating. Before that, I had diarrhea many times, which was a precursor to enteritis, but I didn\’t pay attention and focused on reviewing. I missed the English test and failed in my fourth college entrance examination. I didn\’t dare tell my family all this. I only told them that I had graduated from college and was participating in an internship arranged by the school. It would be difficult for me to go home this year. My younger brother was just a freshman this year. During the summer vacation, he quietly ran away from home because of online dating, causing a big fuss in the village. My parents were upset and didn\’t care about me. They just sent me a text message asking me to find a job and not be as useless as my elder brother. The moment I saw their text message, I wiped away my tears and started my fifth high-altitude relapse. In 2017, Aunt Liu was promoted and transferred to the headquarters. Without her care, my temporary worker status was cancelled. Not long after, a parent reported that the training institution where I worked had erroneously marked prices and violated the interests of consumers, causing the institution to close down. I lost my job continuously, and after deducting the money I spent on medical treatment for enteritis, I only had 280 yuan left in my card, so I couldn’t afford the tuition. My roommates who were repeating my studies at the time had all gone to college. When they heard about my situation, they introduced me to part-time tutors. At the same time, they also raised funds to help me study for another year. With the support of my sisters\’ fundraising and my tutoring income, I paid the tuition again. This is my fourth year of re-study. I worked hard to brush papers and do questions. I am almost familiar with every question type in the college entrance examination, and I even know its evolution better than the teacher. This year, my tutoring income is relatively high and I have more time. Fortunately, in this college entrance examination, I passed the first line for the first time, just over one point. As we all know, this score is still too high to be low, and it can only be ranked among the lowest. However, the progress in the past few years greatly encouraged me. I gritted my teeth and tried again in 2018, using the same deception methods as before. This time, I exceeded the first line by 51 points and could apply for a lower major in 211. But faced with the results, I hesitated again. The past five years of re-reading have been like walking on thin ice, and the past five years have been hard work. The rotten smell before grandma\’s death seemed to stimulate my sense of smell again, making me tremble all over – could I do better? Will I pass 985 if I study for another year? I read it again. Due to my \”legendary experience\”, I have become somewhat famous in the local tutoring community. Coupled with the publicity from teachers, my tutoring fees have skyrocketed. Students who repeat the previous course online are exempted from tuition fees and receive an additional 250 yuan per month for living expenses. This is the most financially prosperous year for me. My parents once said that they wanted to come to my workplace to have a look. I excused myself: \”I just changed my company and it\’s my trial period now. Don\’t come, otherwise you won\’t be able to stay when you arrive.\” During the Chinese New Year, I would still give them two hundred yuan red envelopes each and give my brother a hundred yuan red envelope as a token of appreciation. I am a working adult, but my income is not high. Even if I can\’t go home, I will send it on WeChat. In the circle of friends, I also follow the life track of 9 to 5.renew. They actually had no suspicion at all. My disguise was indeed so meticulous that it was almost terrifying. A gambler who bets on his own destiny, who is paranoid, crazy, and meticulous. In 2019, the seventh college entrance examination. This year, I am 25 years old. My high school classmates and repeat high school classmates have all graduated from college. This year, I exceeded the first-class standard by 32 points, and still could only go to the ordinary one. The night I found out my results, I was enveloped in an unprecedented confusion and panic. It’s been six years since I woke up from chaos for the first time. I seemed to hear others pointing behind my back: Look, that old girl has repeated her studies for six years and still accomplished nothing. Six years of golden years are much more important than an ordinary book. Is it true that if you choose the wrong girl, it’s not worth it and you deserve it? I also feel that I deserve it. I have long felt that I have a psychological problem, but I can\’t get over the hurdle in my heart. I always dreamed about my grandma crying before she died, about my father’s ferocious expression when he beat my mother, and about my brother and brother leaving me alone at home… I thought of committing suicide. I stood on the roof of the teaching building, thinking about what would happen if I jumped. In the end, I discovered that although I was a gambler in life, I was still a coward in the face of death. I crawled downstairs tremblingly and confirmed my decision with tears. My application is for the History Department of an ordinary liberal arts college in the South. That year, I was 25 years old and a freshman in college. How old I feel among a group of young boys and girls aged 18 or 19. It was also difficult for me to communicate with them normally in the dormitory. They are full of longing for the future, but for me, going to college, getting married, and having children are all too late. When I run to listen to professional lectures with a book in my arms, I will vaguely remember how stupid I was back then, and what I believed in was not worth the price I paid. Later, I told Aunt Liu about my experience. She sighed in shock: \”You have misunderstood life and society. Human youth only lasts for ten years.\” Yes, I see the long-distance running of life as It has become a sprint. I regard the college entrance examination as a once and for all thing, and I just keep going my own way. That night, Aunt Liu comforted me: \”What parents don\’t love their children? Your parents love you and your two brothers the same way, but in different ways.\” I decided to walk out of this place that was so overwhelming that I couldn\’t breathe. I lied angrily and hesitated for a long time. I finally plucked up the courage to call my mother. What I didn\’t expect was that after listening to my crying, my mother also cried on the other end of the phone. She told me that in fact, she sensed my difficulties from the time she wanted to see me every time and I always pushed back. It\’s just that she thought I was unsatisfactory at work and having a hard time, but she didn\’t expect that I was under such great pressure alone. In the end, my mother kept apologizing to me, saying that they did something wrong, failed to take good care of me, and failed to understand me in time. The long-lost maternal love made my inner defenses burst instantly. I cried to my mother, I don’t know what the future will be like, even if I graduate, I will still be 28 years old. Who would want an older girl who is not 985 or 211 and has no experience? My mother comforted me and said: \”Silly boy, what is more important than life? Although you have wasted a lot of time, the detours in life are not inevitable.See more scenery. \”I never thought that my mother, who was not well educated, would have such a profound understanding of life. After that, my mother and I communicated more, and my personality became more and more cheerful and optimistic. Every time I met When things get difficult, I always encourage myself: “Be myself. \”In college, I applied for a scholarship and have been working as a tutor part-time. When I walked quickly on the university campus with my books and passed the leisurely 18-year-old boys and girls – the world unfolded before my eyes, cruel and cruel. Shining again. But I believe I will catch up.