The little sister at work who was preparing for pregnancy asked me what was the biggest change after becoming a mother. I glanced at her wavy hair that had just been dyed chestnut color and said: First of all, you need to cut your hair. The little sister looked horrified: Why? ! What does having a baby have to do with cutting your hair? Me: Think about it, I won’t be able to dye my hair or perm it anymore, and I won’t have time to put on elastin every morning like now. Long hair is so troublesome, so it’s better to cut it short, which is refreshing and trouble-free. I\’m kidding, there\’s no rule that says you can\’t have big waves after giving birth. However, what I said is not entirely a lie. It is best not to dye or perm your hair while breastfeeding, and in the two years after giving birth, how many mothers have the time and leisure to style their hair? Alas, yes, after becoming a mother, it seems that the word \”beauty\” has become far away from us. Let’s talk about weight first. Before I was pregnant with my daughter, I had always been at a standard weight. After I became pregnant, I had an excuse to eat delicious food. In a relaxed and happy mood, I gained 40 pounds without noticing. I thought I would recover after unloading, but I didn’t expect that after giving birth, I still weighed ten kilograms more than before pregnancy. Then came the lactation period. How to lose weight during lactation? In order to ensure high milk quality, I drank pig’s trotter soup and then ate another. Pig\’s feet, in my mother\’s words, it\’s not good to just drink soup. You have to eat the meat with milk to be nutritious. Well, just like that, not only did I not regain my figure during lactation, but I actually gained another five kilograms. I finally succeeded in shaping myself into a fat and round figure. I could still wear maternity clothes during maternity leave. After work, all my pants were just I can buy it again because all my previous pants were waist-length! too! Small! Let’s talk about skin. I didn\’t have any stretch marks when I was seven months pregnant. I was very proud of it. During my prenatal check-up, I showed off to a group of mothers who had stretch marks: They all say \”daughters dress up\”. Maybe I was pregnant with a daughter, so my skin was thicker than before. Alright. As a result, I was not happy for a long time. During a prenatal check-up before giving birth, I sadly discovered that countless ugly lines suddenly appeared on my round belly, just like thin cracks on a ripe watermelon due to exposure to the sun. Who told me I could just apply some olive oil and it would disappear? I smeared a whole bottle! It hasn’t disappeared either! There is also the famous Palmer\’s stretch mark removal cream. I have also used it. I can responsibly say that it has no effect. Could it be that those hot moms who advertise that it is effective with just one application are due to individual differences? And IQ. The saying \”one pregnancy lasts three years\” is really not a legend. I have personal experience. When my baby was more than a year old, I came home from get off work and ran to the 6th floor of Building 13. But I obviously lived on the 6th floor of Building 12. I took out my key and pushed it into someone else’s door, but the key wouldn’t fit in! I called my parents at home angrily: Come and open the door, my key can\’t open it! Finally, let’s talk about temperament. Before I got pregnant, I at least had a little fun. I drank afternoon tea from time to time. I knew which dessert shop made the best puffs. After work, I would detour to a small shop to buy the newly acquired succulents. I would also sing K with a few friends on the weekends. Dinner together. After becoming a mother? As the saying goes, this disease of literary young women can be cured by giving birth to a child. My bar counter, which I planned to use for drinking red wine, has become my daughter’s graffiti station. I plant some daisies on the balcony and imagine myself among the daisies. In the middle, the night wind is blowing, which is really indescribable poetry. The result was the next dayWhen I get up in the morning, all the petals are stripped off… I think there must be many mothers like me who are depressed because of the huge changes after giving birth. Otherwise, there wouldn\’t be so many postpartum depression. For example, celebrities who value appearance suffer from it. High-risk groups for postpartum depression. At the New Year\’s Eve party in 2010, Li Xiang, who had not yet lost weight after giving birth, appeared at the party looking good. However, not long ago she was troubled by postpartum depression. After becoming a mother for the first time, Li Xiang was stuck in a psychological dilemma because her image had changed so much. Later, after a long period of adjustment, she was able to face the problem head-on and said frankly: People who point fingers at my figure, please don\’t give me too much. Stress, it is natural to gain weight after giving birth. Another person who had the same experience as her was Na Ying. Na Ying recalled the scene at that time and said: When I see little Gao Xing lying on the side, crying and laughing, I will go crazy for no reason, and I will think, what is this? Na Ying, who was a mother for the first time, didn\’t know what was wrong with her. Every day, she didn\’t want to talk, sleep, or interact with anyone. Her only thought was to die. Not to mention celebrities, postpartum depression is equally common among ordinary mothers. Statistics show that 50% to 57% of women will experience symptoms of mild depression after delivery. New mothers may feel sad and anxious for no reason in the first week after delivery. Some often cry. These unpleasant symptoms usually subside within 2 weeks without treatment, but there are many first-time mothers who cannot relieve themselves or even worsen. Doesn’t it sound a bit scary? After living for more than thirty years, I found for the first time that I was not far away from depression! But some fathers still don’t understand that giving birth has been a woman’s bounden duty since ancient times. In the past, there was no problem with having seven or eight children. Why is there still postpartum depression now? For men, the changes after having children are mainly reflected in their responsibilities. From a man to a father, the burden on their shoulders is virtually heavier. But for women, not only do they have greater responsibilities, but they also undergo huge changes in appearance, mentality, self, etc. The transformation from woman to mother means that they have to pay a greater price and lose more than men. Among them are Contains worldly standards of \”beauty.\” Is \”beauty\” really far away from us? I was unwilling to give in, so I started losing weight as soon as the lactation period ended. I really made up my mind and would not give up until I regained my previous figure. At first I just stopped eating my favorite desserts. Later, I felt that the effect was not obvious, so I even stopped eating staple food. I had a glass of milk every morning and only vegetables at noon and evening. Don’t eat rice, basically don’t touch pork, eat some beef with low fat content at most. Moreover, with such a small dietary intake, he still insists on two hours of aerobic exercise every day. After doing this for three months, my weight has dropped significantly, and I can wear the pants and clothes I used to wear again. However, the side effects have also appeared. One or two years after giving birth, the body is still in a period of recuperation. After losing weight, the resistance plummets along with the weight. Coupled with the fatigue of raising a child, various diseases will soon appear. Come to the door. If the weather changes slightly, I will catch a cold and start coughing as soon as I catch a cold. Especially at night, I cough so hard that I feel like my whole lungs are about to be destroyed by coughing. Once, when I was three years oldMy daughter helped me bring medicine, but her father complained to me: You are just trying to lose weight. You don’t eat this or that. You are undernourished and your resistance is reduced. Why don’t you get sick? My daughter suddenly said: Mom, I still like you when you are fat. You should gain weight. Fatter will look better! I know that my daughter doesn’t really think being fat is good-looking, but she thinks I am healthier when I am fatter and can play with her and take her to many places. But her words also shocked me. Maybe there is a difference between the beauty in children\’s eyes and the beauty we pursue. What we pursue is an external standard of beauty. This beauty requires women to be slim. It doesn\’t matter whether your slimness is healthy or not. It\’s morbid. In the eyes of children, the beauty of their mothers is not like this. They don\’t care whether their mothers are fat or thin. What\’s important is that they are healthy, optimistic, full of vigor, and have the power to protect her. Slowly, I discovered that although I lost something when my child was born, at the same time, I gained a lot as my child grew up. I got a chance to re-perceive the world. After having a child, I observed everything around her with her. It was like living a new life. The heart that was once sensitive to feelings came back. Through the child\’s sight, I saw A beautiful and novel world; I gained the ability to learn. I once felt that I could no longer learn anything after I turned 30, and it was difficult to even read a book. But after I had a child, I was forced to regain my ability to learn and cultivate her reading skills. As I got used to it, I also developed a reading habit. I learned English from her, and my vocabulary increased unknowingly. I was able to have simple conversations when I traveled abroad some time ago. I even gained the reappearance of my own value. I compiled my daily experience of accompanying my children into a document and shared it with more parents. Through this, I met many friends with similar values, and quietly influenced more people… and also gained what? Power, yes, and power. I used to avoid even driving, saying that I didn’t have the skills to go on the road alone. But when my child had a fever, I drove alone without thinking, following the navigation system in the city in the middle of the night to find the nearest children\’s hospital. \”A woman is weak by nature, but becoming a mother makes her strong.\” After becoming a mother, she gained strength for no reason. If I don\’t protect her, who will protect her? What you get is much, much more. The resulting sedimentation in my body forms another kind of \”beauty\”. I gradually understood that before I thought that the word \”beauty\” was insulated from me after becoming a mother, I was actually wrong. After becoming a mother, \”beauty\” has just begun. It\’s just that it has changed from a \”beauty\” recognized externally to a \”beauty\” that seeks strength from within! This is the unique beauty of a mother, calm, calm and confident. Moreover, as the children grow up, especially after entering kindergarten, the mother will have more time for herself. She can use her leisure time to do some exercise, and her complexion and figure will also improve unknowingly. Perhaps, many mothers have experienced the same mental changes as me. Perhaps, some mothers are in the first two years after giving birth and are grieving for the loss. To this end, I would like to give you a set of photos taken by photographer Beall as the first gift of the new year. Beall collected postpartum images of about 50 mothers and compiled them into a book.The title of the book is \”Beautiful Bodies\”. These mothers who accept themselves calmly have a kind of beauty that transcends worldly standards. Finally, I wish all mothers to become more beautiful in the new year. The self you can accept wholeheartedly is the most beautiful self. ^_^
You are Here
- Home
- Parenting knowledge
- Fetal period
- I just realized that after becoming a mother, beauty has just begun.