Don’t be a parent who “shames” your children

For years we have been saying, “Don’t embarrass your parents.” It seems that children have to work hard to look good to their parents. Of course, children who work hard will always look good to their parents. However, no one tells the parents. \”Don\’t let the child be embarrassed!\” If the child makes a mistake, he will say that he has lost the face of his parents. When a parent makes a mistake, why doesn’t anyone say anything to embarrass the child? In fact, the impact on children\’s sensitive hearts is far greater than that of adults whose faces are thicker than city walls. And those who shame their children never feel that they are hurting their children. Every time a friend mentions that relative in his family, he grits his teeth. It\’s a pity that those two children were born in the wrong child and found the wrong parents. That relative of his family had a daughter and a son when he was young with his honest husband who worked as a farmer at home. At the beginning, everyone was poor anyway, so she didn\’t mind it. But after working in a big city for a few years, my whole person changed. When my daughter was thirteen and my son was six, they ran away with a man in the city. And took away all the few savings the family had. For a time, there was a lot of gossip in the village. There is even a saying in school: \”The mother of such and such a family is shameless and ran away with a wild man.\” The six-year-old brother asked his sister, \”What is a wild man?\” My sister bit her lip and said nothing, but said, \”You\’re still young, don\’t worry about it.\” Thirteen-year-old girls are sensible. She began to become dull and inferior, going to school and going home with her head down every day. Even when her best friend called her, she didn\’t even raise her head to answer. She felt like people around her were always pointing fingers at her. \”Look! This is the daughter of that shameless woman! How pitiful.\” In fact, the venomous tongues of the tongue-tied women are more terrifying than the mother\’s abandonment. When she was young, she felt that she was responsible for all the wrong things her mother had done, and she was afraid that someone would say that she was the same as her mother. What her mother did made her suffer from shame and low self-esteem throughout her life. After graduating from high school, she went south to work and found a young man to marry. Because she didn\’t want to go back to that village, let alone that hurtful home. If the marriage is not handled well, it will lead to unhappiness in the family. It is always the child who gets hurt the most in the end. Under the cover of the nest, there are completed eggs. If the parents are not well educated, the children will be humiliated. I remember taking my son to dinner once. The dining table next door is a bureau. On one side were a fat, middle-aged man and a woman of similar age. Opposite him is a \”teacher\” who is dressed in an avant-garde style and has long hair and a beard. Next to him sits a young man of seventeen or eighteen years old. The young man was very sensible and kept getting up to add tea and wine to everyone. I heard the middle-aged man across from me talk about his business experience. He made hundreds of thousands more last month. The teacher opposite was absorbed in drinking and eating. At half pay, a friend came and handed cigarettes to everyone. I also handed one to the young man, but he took it without smoking. \”Aha! What a nice guy! He doesn\’t smoke!\” said the friend who handed him the cigarette. I saw that woman speaking up, maybe because she had drunk some wine, with full firepower and a high-pitched voice: \”Smoke quickly! What are you afraid of? Let me tell you, \’Men who don\’t smoke or drink are not men.\’ Such people are either Beggars are either in jail. You are eighteen years old and you have toSmoke, if you don\’t smoke outside, why are you doing it? Who are you pretending to show! \”The sound was so loud and the reason was sufficient that the young man was so frightened that he quickly lit up his cigarette. It also made many diners nearby look sideways to see who was talking about the \”standards of a real man.\” After a short rest, the young man may be under pressure. He was a little big, so he smiled at my son and teased the child. Looking at that sunny smiling face, at that moment I felt that he was a big kid. The middle-aged man opposite began to get closer to the teacher, and he was extremely polite Question: “Teacher, my child is going to the army, please give me some advice. \”Serving tea and cigarettes, he was so polite. He seemed to be a very polite and easy-going person. However, he found that the beer was gone. So he turned around and shouted sharply: \”Waiter, bring the wine! \”Because the hotel\’s business is good, the waiters are too busy. \”If you don\’t come, where are you dead? \”The waiter hurried over. \”Sir, how many bottles do you want? \”Just one bottle!\” How many bottles do you think I want? \”Extremely impatient, looking like an uncle. He was completely different from the one he had just gotten close to, but he was a perfect match for that woman. I saw that child lowering his head the whole time, listening in ignorance to the teacher\’s three things to pay attention to. Big deal. I broke into a cold sweat when I saw that wealthy father. Fortunately, he was not my friend. The woman next to her could successfully keep me out of their circle. It was really different. Don’t fight against each other. As a parent, it is human nature to host a banquet for teachers and familiarize children with social etiquette. But seeing other people subvert children’s three views and using those so-called social laws to educate children without stopping is inappropriate. It was the fault of his father. And he yelled at the waiter in public, arrogantly, exposing his uneducated nature. Uneducated behavior will only bring shame to the child. Look at that delicate and thin child. But now He is still young, has immature thoughts, is not financially independent, and is still controlled by you. When one day he discovers that your world is not acceptable to him, then you should be prepared to be alone. Your arrogance and sinking over the years is You will shed tears of regret in the future. Some parents always ignore the rules of society. That not only brings shame, but also often harms the children. Once in the park, I saw a father and son playing in the flower garden in front. Because there were too many people playing, someone stepped on a path in the middle of the flower garden. At this time, my father wanted to pass through it. At this time, the child quickly stopped me: \”Dad, it is written there that flowers and trees are affectionate, please show mercy under your feet!\” My teacher also said not to trample on flowers and plants! \”It\’s okay, your teacher just told you to behave yourself!\” People need to be flexible, society is much more complicated than school. \”No, there is a security guard there.\” \”He dares!\” Come on, daddy is here. \”The child still stood there hesitating. At this time, his father had already strode in. \”Hey! That gentleman, don\’t step on flowers and trees, come out quickly! \”The security guard reminded. He ignored it and continued walking. \”Come out quickly, or you will be fined 200! \”You set the rules!\” The fine is 200, why don\’t you grab it? Either you kneel here and I\’ll throw 500 to you! \”This is the rule!\” Please cooperate.\” The security guard became anxious when he heard this. \”Cooperate, you idiot! \”Then he kicked the flowers on both sides hard with his feet., the surrounding flowers were folded in half. \”Dad, come on!\” the child shouted. Seeing that the child was there, the father still came out. The child tightly held the corner of his father\’s clothes and hid behind him. He whispered, \”Dad, go back, forget it, forget it!\” The security guard was not a vegetarian either. Seven or eight managers were called in instantly. There were also a bunch of tourists watching around. At this time, the child hid his head and was frightened. This seems like a small thing, but it should be an unforgettable event for the child. Dad not only denied his values, he trampled on them. What he trampled was not the flower garden, but the child\’s dignity. Such unbearable parents are destined to bring shame to their children\’s lives. As a parent, if you really love your children, you will have far-reaching goals. This \”plan\” does not mean how much money to save, nor does it mean how many unspoken social rules you teach him. Rather, good habits and correct values ​​​​are a person’s character and cultivation of life. It really doesn\’t matter if you are poor, as long as you don\’t complain about life, don\’t be negative in life, as long as you are morally noble, well-educated, and have a tireless and progressive heart. Your children will not dislike you for being poor. And even if you are rich, but your outlook on life is ruined, even if you make a fortune every day, you will only bring shame to your children. For example, ordinary parents can dress appropriately and generously when attending parent-teacher meetings. Have great respect for teachers. Parents who are kind and gentle to their children’s classmates. Children can feel that their parents are excellent and popular, which can make them look good and increase their confidence. And even if you are extremely wealthy, have luxury cars and fine clothes, you boss around your teachers, look down upon your classmates and their parents, and look aloof. The child will only think that you are boring and tacky, and the people he respects and likes will not like you. What do you think the children will think? As a parent, on the way to educating your children, you must first become an educated person yourself. Only in this way can the children not be \”shamed\”.