alert! The four favorite ways of raising babies will sooner or later ruin the child

Yesterday, a friend in the mom group retweeted a Weibo picture. Breast department colleague: I just finished treating a poor little baby girl. Parents who see it must educate the people around them: Do not squeeze the nipples of newborns. If the nipples of baby girls are squeezed and infected, the milk buds will rot and may cause one breast to be missing and underdeveloped. I will need breast reconstruction when I grow up! After becoming a mother, when I see similar news, I can’t help but have red eyes. When classmate Zhe was just born, the relatives who came to visit saw that his nipples were a little inverted. They enthusiastically suggested that I squeeze the baby\’s nipples, saying that if I didn\’t squeeze them, they might remain inverted in the future. Fortunately, I checked online and learned some knowledge about the dangers of squeezing my nipples, so I didn\’t \”do it\”. Those old people who are superstitious about squeezing their babies\’ nipples often have two reasons to support their actions: one is that the newborn\’s nipples are sunken, and the other is that the baby\’s nipples are swollen and even ooze yellowish liquid (called neonatal lactation). Whether it is depression or lactation, it will improve or disappear on its own as the baby grows up, so there is no need to squeeze. If the situation does not improve, we should seek help from a doctor instead of \”squeezing\” to solve the problem. If the operation is not done properly and it causes skin infection, it will really affect the whole life! Of course we should be grateful to the elderly for taking care of their children, but gratitude does not mean that we do not have our own principles, and gratitude does not mean that we completely obey the experience of the elderly. So in addition to wearing too thick clothes, over-protecting, chasing after feeding and other shortcomings, today we will talk about 4 behaviors that are easily ignored but have far-reaching consequences! Randomly running a red light – \”They dare not hit me anyway!\” Red light running is relatively common in China. Unless there is a traffic policeman on duty at the intersection and it is clear how much it costs to run a red light, for pedestrians, the red light is useless. There are especially many old people who run red lights. Their point of view is: Anyway, I am so old, they dare not hit me; even if they hit me, they will have to pay compensation! This morning, when I was sending my child to kindergarten, I almost witnessed a traffic accident: an old man was riding a bicycle with his child across the road from south to north. The straight traffic light had turned yellow, but she wanted to cross before it turned red. Crossing the road, the bicycle was riding very fast; when she reached the middle of the road, the east-west traffic light turned green, but she did not slow down. A car started slowly and then braked suddenly, almost hitting the grandfather and grandson. For things like running a red light, maybe you have done it 99 times without incident, but the hundredth time you are hit or hit someone, the result is 100% injury. Who can afford such a result? Therefore, parents who let the elderly take care of their children must explain to the elderly the dangers of running a red light, especially if they have children. Unruly – \”What do you care about with the children?\” There is a set of slides in the community. At four or five o\’clock every afternoon, the children gather near the slides to play. Most children obey the rules and know that they have to wait for the child in front of them to slide down before they can play. One day, a boy about 4 years old had to climb up the slide. The girl who had already sat down and was about to slide down asked him to get out of the way. He turned a deaf ear and the boy\’s grandfather did not stop him. The girl\’s parents stopped their child from sliding down, and explained to the boy that this is not how the slide works. You should go up from the stairs and then slide down. The boy still couldn\’t.Moved. When the grandfather saw that his grandson had been criticized, he retorted in a very unfriendly tone: \”The slide is not yours, you don\’t care how we play! We have ideas!\” When the grandfather secretly felt that his child\’s brain was When the hole was bigger, a bigger child ignored the presence of the boy on the slide and slid down directly. As a result, the back of the boy\’s head fell firmly to the ground and he cried loudly. If something goes wrong, it will be useless to find out who is right and who is wrong. It will just make the child suffer in vain. It is definitely a mistake in the guidance of the parents. Therefore, if you let the elderly take care of children, you must let them understand the importance of rule awareness, so as to prevent the children from suffering a big disadvantage in the future – children can be little princesses and bullies at home, but you cannot prevent the existence of big rules in society. When individual consciousness meets social rules, it is often the individual who suffers. Shirking responsibility – \”I didn\’t do it!\” Many mothers born in the 1980s feel the same way about their parents who refuse to admit their faults and put face above all else. They are willing to give us the best material conditions, but they have never thought of achieving spiritual equality with us. Moreover, because of face issues, they feel that saying \”I\’m sorry\” to their juniors is too embarrassing. When they become grandparents, they will still refuse to admit their fault or laugh it off in order to evade responsibility. Therefore, when children raised by the elderly are unwilling to take responsibility for their mistakes, or try to be clever in order to prove that they are right, we should not blame the children, but that their growing environment does not give them the opportunity to \”learn from their mistakes.\” Regarding this, we cannot change our parents. All we can do is that in the process of getting along as a family of three, family members boldly admit their mistakes and resolutely correct them, and the party who accepts the apology does not criticize them. When children understand that everyone makes mistakes and it doesn\’t matter as long as they correct them, they will no longer resist taking their own responsibilities. Extreme guidance – \”We won\’t play with him anymore.\” Does this sentence sound familiar? When a child has a dispute with a friend, the elderly will often teach the child afterwards to stop playing with the \”bad boy\” who \”loves to hit people\”/\”loves to grab things\”/\”loves to yell\”. But often the adults are still angry about the dispute, and the children get together to play again. Yesterday, I saw two children in kindergarten who had conflicts coming together to have fun. One of them was forcibly taken away from the scene by his grandfather. Amidst the child\’s crying, the grandfather kept saying: \”Have I told you? Stop playing with him, why don\’t you remember more!\” The child\’s tolerance He came together with the living, but in the process of growing up, he was ruined by the old man\’s black and white, friend or enemy outlook on life. Therefore, if you leave your child to an elderly person with a relatively extreme outlook on life, you must provide the child with guidance on diversified values. After all, a child with too single or even extreme thinking habits will have many problems in getting along with his friends in the future. .