If you don’t love your child, please use these seven ways to hurt him

Concubine, are you okay? ! Don’t you often share good educational concepts with us? Aren’t we often told to love our children with wisdom? Why are you trying to scare us with a title like this again? You may think so in your mind before reading the specific content. Don\’t worry, everyone, of course I know that there is no parent who doesn\’t love their children and would not want to hurt them. However, in the process of love, parents often make some actions that unknowingly turn love into a kind of harm, and this harm often has a long-lasting impact on their children. Xiaofei once saw this summary: If you master the following 7 points, you can basically destroy your own children. Don\’t think about whether this statement is exaggerated. Parents can check to see if they have done such a thing. ① Please make your child feel that he is not good at anything and that no one appreciates him. For example: he is not good at studying, his appearance is not good, he is not good at socializing, he is not good at housework, he is sloppy and careless, and his family is burdened by him… In short, make him feel that he has nothing good to do. . ② Often compare him with people who are \”better\” than him. For example: often say this: \”Look at who they are, never let their parents worry!\” Such words are the most impactful and destructive. It is one of the best quotes to destroy children. ③Create yourself as a victim of the family and make your children feel guilty. For example: often tell your children that since you had him, you haven’t even watched a movie, and you have been so worried about him that you are sick from exhaustion; It would be better to be more specific about which disease in your body is caused by him. In other words, if it weren\’t for taking care of him, I would have made great progress in my career. In this case, children will feel guilty if they listen too much, and may even be unable to face their future lives positively. ④ Frequently use a rough and strong tone, saying words that attack and belittle children. For example: when talking to children, use a commanding tone instead of a discussion tone. The volume is often above 70 decibels, and even include some sarcastic words, such as: \”You are so stupid\”, \”I have never seen you so stupid\”, \”How did I give birth to you\” and so on. ⑤The child has no freedom, and everything about him is decided by you. For example: you must keep a close eye on his whereabouts; if he has a diary, you must try to check it; if he has letters, you must review them. Doing so can make him feel like a puppet and lose confidence in himself. ⑥ Taking anger out on children. For example: If something goes wrong at work, you will lose your temper at your children unconsciously when you come back. Without clarifying the whole story, he would teach the child a lesson whenever something happened, and he would not be allowed to complain or cry. Doing so will severely damage the child\’s self-esteem and enhance the child\’s sense of inferiority. ⑦The first 6 tips for embarrassing your child in public are all \”single exercises\” in the family. If you really want to completely \”destroy\” him, the 7th tip is the trump card. That is to criticize and scold him in front of outsiders (or classmates, relatives, friends or neighbors), making him feel ashamed. From a psychological point of view, doing so will make children fear society and make them feel ashamed of themselves. After reading this, are you convinced? How many of the seven landmines have you stepped on? Maybe in the eyes of some parents, these practices are just \”inappropriate\” or \”a bit excessive\”, but in the eyes of children,From the concubine\’s point of view, these seven points are very pertinent and not alarmist. Because children who are in a critical period of physical and mental development are fragile and sensitive and need the affirmation, care and correct guidance from their parents. If parents treat their children in these inappropriate ways for a long time, the negative impact on them will be very serious. serious. For example, the third one is to portray yourself as a victim of the family, so that your children will feel guilty. This can be seen in many families after divorce. Usually it is a self-pitying single mother who places her own value on her children. When the children make decisions that are not in line with her wishes, the sentence \”I did not remarry for you…\” turns into a shackles, binding the child\’s freedom. There are also the second and fourth items, which remind the concubine of a proverb: a kind word warms three winters, and a bad word makes June cold. The power of language is so for strangers, and even more so for the closest children. Often, an unintentional bad word or serious injury from a parent can make it difficult for long-adult children to let go. Therefore, please do not use the seven practices mentioned above to harm your children. Unless you really don\’t love him. Unless you want to destroy him.