The cruelest thing about growing up is to force your child to go faster

In the eyes of ordinary people, faster is more efficient, faster is not a waste of time. As parents, we often say to our children \”Can you hurry up?\” However, always telling your children to hurry up may be the cruelest thing for them when growing up. Children who are forced to grow up by their parents often lose themselves easily. Xiaoguo, the daughter of colleague Xiao Wang, has been a slow-tempered person since she was a child. She does things in a leisurely manner and grew up under the urging of the impatient A Fang. At first, Xiao Wang\’s urging was very useful. Xiao Guo was a little faster than his peers whether he was eating or getting dressed. But after Xiaoguo entered elementary school and was forced to grow up by her parents, she began to show problems. Compared with her peers, she is less able to think independently and is not confident. She has to ask her parents or teachers for everything to know what to do next. As children grow up little by little, they will continue to explore the world. Children have their own way of perceiving the world, and these perceptions are unique. It is also the unique feeling that gives them different understandings and different ideas. Parents forcing their children to grow up quickly will make their children question themselves. The child will doubt himself. Could it be that I did something wrong, so my parents forced me to go faster? Is it because I am not as good as others that my parents force me to keep up with others? Children who have been pushed by their parents for a long time will lose their own judgment and only grow up according to their parents\’ standards. Such children will lack the ability to think independently and lack self-confidence, and will definitely lose themselves. Going faster does not mean that children are more competitive. Nowadays, there is great pressure to compete in society, and parents have a greater say than their children. When parents see their children procrastinating and taking their time in doing things, they will think of their children\’s future and worry that their children will be eliminated by society and will not be able to gain a foothold in society. But, does being faster really prove that children are more competitive? If children do things faster, it does not mean they are more efficient. Paying too much attention to speed and ignoring quality is not good for the growth of children. On the contrary, if during the growth process, parents give their children enough space to slowly explore, learn to think, find their own learning methods, and gradually develop self-confidence and independence, such children will be able to develop a sound character in the future. Only children who can truly think independently, learn independently, and have a sound personality will be competitive when they grow up. Children have their own rhythm, let them take their time. The reason why parents think their children do things slowly is because they use their own rhythm to measure their children. When your child just learns to eat, and you see him scattering the rice everywhere, and half an hour passes without finishing the meal, you will get anxious and force the child to eat faster; when you make breakfast, you find that the child is still lying on the bed. When you are sleeping, you will directly lift the quilt and force the child to get up quickly; when you are about to go out, you see that the child has been dragging his feet for a long time to tie his shoelaces, and you are anxious to ask the child to hurry up… The child needs to slowly adapt to the rhythm of life. , it is impossible to become as proficient as an adult all of a sudden. We now eat faster than our children, get up faster than them, and tie our shoes faster than them. At that time, because of meWe have decades longer than children for us to learn slowly. If someone urges us to hurry up every day, we will probably feel upset too. Why can\’t you just let your child take his time? It is a happy thing to accompany your children to grow up slowly. We always wish that our children would become sensible and mature all of a sudden, so that we would be much more relaxed and less worried. However, we have overlooked the process of accompanying our children to grow up, which is also a happy experience. Long Yingtai wrote in the book \”Child, Take Your Time\”: \”I was sitting on the steps under the setting sun, watching this child with clear eyes doing one thing attentively. Yes, I am willing to wait. In a lifetime, let him tie this bow calmly and calmly, with his 5-year-old fingers. Child, take your time, take your time…\”. Accompanying the child to grow up little by little, watching him grow from babbling to articulate, watching him stagger to a healthy pace, from a little baby in the hands of his parents to a little adult who can take charge of his own life, time passes quietly, They are growing, and so are we, which is so beautiful and happy.