How many children have been ruined by their parents’ values?

When I was a kid, I had a neighbor brother who often came to my house to play. Every time he goes there, he loses some of my toys, coins, stickers, etc. So I was very repelled by him coming to my house. Same goes for other kids. One time we met his mother, and she complained all over the place, saying that we had lost something, and all of this soon appeared on him. I thought he would learn a lesson. As a result, we were the ones being taught a lesson. His mother frowned and curled her lips, and said in annoyance: \”Isn\’t it just that crappy thing? Let him play with it, and he will return it to you after he has played with it enough.\” ——In fact, he never paid it back. I have also heard my mother show off to others: We kids always have something to do without spending money. When he was 19, he was imprisoned for theft. No one is surprised. There is a distant uncle who is very capable and very mean. I earned a lot of money as a bricklayer, but I saved it all and was reluctant to eat or use it. There was no decent furniture in the house. My daughter grew up wearing second-hand clothes. The couple never participated in weddings and weddings that required gifts. And his daughter later became such a person. She now works in a kindergarten. It is said that because her clothes are too shabby, she is often mistaken for a cleaner by their parents. She also never attended the weddings of her colleagues and classmates. When others treat her to Western food, she treats them to Malatang. Once the director was seriously ill and had surgery, and everyone pooled their money together to buy gifts for visits, but she neither contributed nor showed up. Later, colleagues basically did not take her with them to their group activities. When she got married, she booked a dozen wedding banquet tables, but only two tables were filled. Nuo Da\’s room was deserted. Come to think of it, her life must be the same. My university teacher once told me that she had a student who was very outstanding and was the president of the school student union. Unfortunately, after graduation, I returned to my hometown, a small town on the 18th tier. At that time, she felt that it was a pity that such a good piece of material ended up in the county. She urged him to go to Beijing and helped him contact a good job. He didn\’t want to go, thinking it would be good to go back to his hometown and become a civil servant. The teacher called his father and wanted him to persuade him. But his father said proudly: \”It\’s great to be a civil servant. You will have a stable job and no worries about food and clothing.\” \”Our small county is great. Now we have high-rise buildings and everything.\” \”We are just looking forward to his coming back. Go It’s better to go home anywhere.” The teacher finally understood why this boy was so determined to return to his hometown. She said that it cannot be said that it is not good to be a civil servant in the county, but it depends on the person. If he goes back, it is really a loss of talent. If this kid goes to a big city, he will probably have a big career. A female classmate got divorced. Because he didn\’t have a son. Her parents-in-law favored sons over daughters to the point of perversion. They kept saying that their sons were theirs and that their daughters were raised by others. Her husband has been accustomed to hearing his parents ridicule and ridicule relatives and friends who have no sons since he was a child. He has a deep-rooted belief that if he doesn\’t have a son, he will be shameless and will be sorry for his ancestors. When things get serious, we all try to persuade them. Her husband burst into tears and said over and over again: We have a very good relationship, but I really feel life is meaningless without a son, and I am a single generation… Now he has remarried and given birth to a daughter. I heard that he and his second wife were not on good terms, and he was injured every now and then. I wonder if his life is interesting now. Parents are their children\’s first teachers. This teacher hasHow important? How important it is. They determined a child\’s factory settings and entered the most primitive and important information into his life – without even brainwashing, he inserted it directly into a whiteboard at will. Good or bad, he must accept them all. Every child once accepted the words of his parents as truth. \”Mom said you can\’t eat sweets\” \”Mom said it\’s embarrassing to wear short skirts\” \”Mom said it\’s useless to go to school\”… These are all the standards and basis for our words and deeds. Only after reading a lot of books and experiencing a lot of things can we gradually adjust the information and get rid of the dross. It\’s just that often, although we have our own thoughts and judgments, and already know that what our parents say is not a golden rule, \”Mom said\” is still deeply rooted in our subconscious. Even if we vaguely feel that something is wrong, we can\’t defeat the powerful and colorful concept implantation before. , struggled again and again, but failed to reverse it. As a result, many people are kidnapped by their parents\’ three views and have never been independent throughout their lives. And no parents are perfect, some are very imperfect, and imperfection is enough to ruin your life. Therefore, when we grow up, the first thing we must learn is to think independently and re-examine the will of our parents. When thinking and making decisions, for example, if you think it is embarrassing to have a daughter, making more money is more important than a job with good prospects, returning to the county is better than staying in Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou… you have to ask yourself, \”Is this my idea or my parents\’ idea? \”Is this the right idea?\” Then expand your thinking and do your best to make a judgment that truly comes from you. Some of what my mother said was right, and some of it was wrong. You need to be vigilant, sober-minded, and take drastic measures to correct the wrong parts. In this way, your life is your own. And if you are a parent, you must be more vigilant, read more, see more, think more, do your best to improve your three views, give your children the right guidance, and never let your stupidity, conservatism, and short-sightedness ruin your children. The child\’s life.