A mother’s emotional stability is a blessing to her children

My daughter has a best friend in kindergarten. The two of them sit together in class and play together after class. My daughter often talks about this little girl. The little girl has a lively personality, is optimistic and confident, and is very lovable. As time goes by, there will naturally be friction between the children. The two will get angry with each other and ignore each other. Soon they will get together again. I am also very happy for my daughter to play with this child. I got to know the little girl’s mother because I picked up her children and participated in group activities in the kindergarten. After getting acquainted with her, I discovered that there was a reason for the little girl’s good character. I have never seen a little girl\’s mother lose her temper with her. She always has a smile on her face and looks at her children seriously when answering their questions without any impatience. When talking to outsiders, her voice is soft and she occasionally smiles shyly. I said, \”Have you never lost your temper with your child?\” She said, \”Very rarely, I can usually control it. The child is so young, and getting angry with her will only alienate her from me and not solve any problems.\” Yes. With such an emotionally stable mother, I believe that this little girl will not be any worse off in the future. When I was a teacher, there was a student in my class who gave me a lot of headaches. Although she is a girl, her personality is no weaker than that of boys. She dares to challenge the teacher in class, and the teacher\’s words go into her ears. At night, after turning off the lights, she crawls out of the school gate and goes to the Internet cafe to surf the Internet. Once again, after evening self-study and checking the dormitory, I did not leave immediately, but asked a male colleague to follow me to the Internet cafe. Sure enough, I found her in the Internet cafe closest to the school. I first arranged for her to go back to sleep, and then called her parents the next day. I felt that it was necessary to have a good communication with the parents about the child\’s problems. The child\’s mother came here. Her mother said that she was in charge of the child\’s affairs and that the child\’s father was not available. I briefly explained the student\’s situation. Before I finished speaking, the mother stood up, grabbed the child, and gave her a slap in the face. This slap caught us all off guard. The child was stubborn and didn\’t say a word. The mother wanted to reach out, but I pulled her back. My mother said, \”Teacher, if this child disobeys, you should be beaten or scolded. We parents have no objection.\” After the parents left, I had an in-depth talk with the student. She told me that her mother had taught her this way since she was a child. For her and her brother, whenever they did something bad, their mother would either scold or beat them. Later they got used to it, and sometimes she would deliberately act rebellious to piss off her mother. The child\’s father is away from home all year round. When he comes back, the two of them can\’t say more than a few words before quarreling, and the child hides away and doesn\’t dare to express his anger. Later, I communicated with the parents again and reminded the mother to pay attention to her attitude towards her child. After one semester, the child\’s performance improved significantly. She said that her mother no longer scolded her during the holidays. She probably felt that she had grown up. When we first took the baby back and took care of it ourselves, we, mother and daughter, often had fights. The child has a stubborn temper and starts pouting whenever he disagrees with his words. I believe that I should set rules for my children from an early age, so naturally I will not compromise. Although he wouldn\’t raise his hand to hit her, a cold war is inevitable. This is often the case at home: one is having a temper here, the other is angry there, and neither of them pays attention to the other, nor does anyone compromise. The one who suffers is the child’s father.He was coaxed and persuaded, but no one paid any attention to him. Things have to be solved, and the solution is often my compromise. As long as I walk over and say a soft word, and then hold my daughter in my arms, she immediately stops losing her temper and sheds a few tears of grievance, and the matter is settled. Chapter. Later, I stopped confronting her head-on. I learned the way of my child\’s father and solved the problem in a roundabout way. I became calm and it was naturally difficult for my child to express his temper. Of course, being emotionally stable does not mean being unprincipled, but having a gentle and firm attitude. You can tolerate the child\’s various emotions. You can reason with the child with a gentle attitude and express your love for her. However, you must stick to your own opinions on matters of great right and wrong. in principle. Fully considering the child\’s emotions without losing principles is the basic principle of an emotionally stable mother. The most important thing is to let the children understand what should be done and what should not be done. This understanding is not expressed by the mother getting angry. Many mothers work during the day, take care of their children at night, and have to take their children to and from get off work. The workload can be imagined. Sometimes they are busy and tired. If their children do not do well in some aspects, they can\’t help but lose their temper with them. When the mother loses her temper, the child will naturally become frightened, and the mother will think that the child knows that he is wrong. In fact, at this time, the child cares more about his mother\’s attitude towards him rather than his own right or wrong. Only when the mother controls her temper can she start discussing matters with her children rather than venting each other\’s emotions. It is not difficult to find that the mother\’s mood in the family is stable and peaceful, the atmosphere of the family is generally not bad, and the children generally do not do anything out of the ordinary. If the mother\’s mood is stable, the atmosphere at home will not be tense at all times, and the child will not be too cramped if he or she grows up in a relaxed environment. On the contrary, in a family where the mother loses her temper all the time, the family is prone to chaos, adults and children cannot have peace, and the children\’s problems will not be solved in any way. I believe that behind a calm child, there is usually a calm mother. And behind a moody child, there is usually a moody parent.