Children who have never suffered hardship will not be very happy in the future

When you were in kindergarten, I took you home one day. The heavy snow has just stopped, and you are calling to build a snowman. I said I wanted to go home and put on a down jacket and gloves, but you wouldn\’t, so you rushed into the snow happily. After playing so hard, you got a fever that night and coughed for the next few days. I blame myself very much for not being cruel enough to hold you back that day. We went to see a Chinese medicine doctor and got back several sets of decoctions, and we drank a small bowl of them every day. On the first day, I tried my best to persuade you to finish the drink. As soon as you put down the bowl and felt relieved, you vomited all over. The next day, I changed my strategy and seriously ordered you to drink. You drank it with difficulty with tears in your eyes, and felt like vomiting after you drank it. I yelled: Don’t vomit! You were a little scared. You pursed your lips tightly and sat upright, not daring to move. You looked funny and pitiful at the same time. In the evening you asked me if I wanted to drink tomorrow. I said yes. You said that Chinese medicine is so bitter and my mother is so cruel. I said I knew it, but if I didn’t drink it, I would have to go to the hospital to get blood drawn and get injections, which would be even more painful. I also said that when people live, they have to suffer some hardships. If they don’t do this, they will have to endure that. For example, if you don\’t go home and put on your down jacket on a snowy day, and you don\’t want to suffer the pain of being patient for a while, now you have to suffer the pain of drinking Chinese medicine. If you don\’t want to take the pain of traditional Chinese medicine now, you will have to take the pain of injections tomorrow. This is often the case. The first hardships you suffer are small ones, and only by enduring the small ones can you avoid the big ones. In fact, I also want to say that it’s too late for my mother to be cruel. If I had hurt you earlier that day and asked you to go home and change clothes first, God would not be able to hurt you now. You like to eat everything, potato chips, lollipops, chocolate ice cream… except vegetables. But I just let you eat vegetables, and you must eat the specified amount at each meal. You were very angry and said, \”I won\’t let you eat what I like, and I will let you eat what I don\’t like! How did you become a mother!\” You even told other children: Your mother is so kind, you can eat whatever you want. My mother is so bad, she just wants me to eat green vegetables. I burst into laughter. Of course I hope to be a mother who does everything you want, but I can do whatever you want, but God won’t. A friend’s son grew up eating fried chicken and potato chips. Now I am fifteen years old, weighing one hundred and eighty pounds. I have high blood lipids, high blood pressure, fatty liver, lethargy, and poor immunity… I also have low self-esteem and am not liked by girls, so I won’t talk about it. He exercised to lose weight. He ran for an hour every day and did aerobics for an hour. He also had to cooperate with various trainings, which was very hard. And you have to be on a diet, let alone fried chicken and potato chips, you can\’t even eat too much rice. Now you only know that eating vegetables is bitter and quitting snacks is bitter, but you don’t understand that losing your health will be a hundred times harder than this. And my \”bad\” mother understands. Therefore, in order to prevent you from great suffering in the future, I have to give you some small suffering now. When you were in first grade, you repeatedly didn\’t want to go to school. You said class is so boring, like going to jail. Every Friday after school you would be happy and cheerful, every Monday morning you would be frowning, depressed and confused, and occasionally you would cry. Now you are in third grade. You said you hate people who invent schools and homework the most. If you become a high official, the first thing you will do is order the schools to be blown up. In fact, every time I see you fussing about your homework until late at night, I feel a little sad. I have been to school and know that study is hard. It’s just that I’ve been around the world and know that it’s even harder if you don’t study. If you don’t learn calligraphy now, when others can write beautiful papers in the future, you won’t even be able to chat on WeChat. youIf you don\’t learn English now, you will look like a fool standing next to others when you talk fluently with foreign friends in the future. If you don\’t read much now, in the future when others talk about finance, high technology, and black holes in the universe, all you can think about is celebrity gossip about the rising price of pork. If you don’t insist on learning now, when others use knowledge to create value and get rich returns in the future, you will have no choice but to work hard from dawn to dusk, running around for food and clothing. If you don\’t study, you are a mentally disabled person, and most of your dreams will be impossible to realize. This kind of pain is a thousand times harder than studying. So, I have to send you to school in cold blood and make you suffer. Also, you are learning to swim, and the coach yells at you to go back and forth in the swimming pool every day. It is very tiring. If you want to give up, I strongly object. Your friend broke your toy, and you want me to negotiate with his parents, but I won\’t cooperate, so you have to bite the bullet and go it alone. When your friends come to play at home and you chase them away if you disagree with them, I ask you to apologize so that you can avoid the difficulty of saying sorry. Your toys were scattered all over the floor and your clothes were piled on the bed. I asked you to tidy them up yourself, but you reluctantly did it and you were a little angry with me. I signed you up for a hiking training camp. You walked ten kilometers and you collapsed from exhaustion. When you came back, you got angry at me. I seem to be a heinous mother, so inconsiderate, unreasonable, and unkind. I insist on making you unhappy, causing you trouble, and making you suffer. But you don’t know that after all these hardships, sadness, frustration, and irritability, you have become stronger, gained knowledge, courtesy, and ability to survive, learned self-discipline and patience, and learned to fight and persevere. These will make you as free from suffering and fear as possible in the future. I am a somewhat pessimistic person, and I always feel that there are more sufferings than happiness in this world. If there are ten points in a person\’s life experience, I think it would be six points dull, three points hard, and one point happy. If you want to adjust this ratio, you need to swallow all the hardships you deserve in time. Otherwise, all the suffering you escape now may consume tenfold and a hundredfold the happiness you deserve in the future. Just like getting a vaccination, it hurts, but if you endure the pain, you will avoid greater pain when the disease comes. There is some bitterness and you will have to eat it sooner or later. If I don’t give it to you, others will give it to you, and God will give it to you. And what they give will be a thousand times more painful than what I give. The world you will face in the future will not be as gentle, cautious, or considerate of your feelings as your mother. They may give you a sudden and cruel blow, regardless of whether you are willing to accept it or whether you can bear it. Then, rather than letting you suffer great hardships from others, I would rather let you suffer small hardships from me. A good mother must be a little cruel and cold-blooded. I am the person who is most reluctant to let you suffer in the world. Even so, and because of this, I have to add a little suffering to you in my love to reduce the risk of you encountering greater suffering. Hope you understand.