Important Reminder: As a parent, you are about to expire

On Friday night, I asked my son to accompany me for a walk in the park. He was not very happy. He wanted to paint and do crafts at home. After some hard work on my part and the truth that \”the body is the capital of revolution\” and so on, he reluctantly agreed. I couldn\’t help but feel a little disappointed, thinking of my son when he was a child. At that time, no matter where I went, he would follow me every step of the way, and he would look for me everywhere when I lost sight of me. Sometimes, because I have to go out for something and I can\’t take him with me, he will burst into tears. In the first few days of kindergarten, he cried and shouted that he wanted to go home with me and not be separated from his mother. The past events are still vivid in my mind. How much that little baby needed his mother’s company! But now, this boy, who is in the fifth grade of elementary school, prefers to be alone quietly rather than go out in a noisy way with me. There were a lot of people in the park. We passed by several young people and found them with hair dyed red and green, wearing strange clothes, flip-flops on their feet, cigarettes in their mouths, laughing and chatting as if no one else was around, and spitting out ugly curse words from time to time. As usual, I seized the opportunity to educate my son: \”You must not imitate them. Remember at all times to have social ethics, be civilized, and pay attention to image…\” \”Mom, I know! This sentence comes from You\’ve been talking about it since I was two years old, right? You\’ve been talking about it for ten years, and I can memorize it. Please don\’t talk about it again in the future. Don\’t worry, I won\’t learn to be bad. If I want to learn to be bad, I should have learned to be bad. Now, I don’t even know a bad word, aren’t you worried?” My son’s words made me laugh. Yes, my son has grown up under my high standards and strict requirements. Now he loves the motherland, respects his teachers, unites his classmates, is civilized and polite, does not curse or fight, and is a sunny boy, like a tall and upright tree. Little white poplar. In the park, trees can be seen everywhere. I pointed to two trees on the side of the road and asked my son: \”These two trees are exactly the same species. Why is one tall and strong, and the other crooked and short?\” My son thought for a moment and replied: \”The tree on the left has deep roots. It is rooted into the ground and continuously absorbs nutrients, so it grows strong and straight. As for the tree on the right, you see, the roots are exposed and the roots are not deep. Of course, it is malnourished, and it soon grows crooked and forked. , so you are short and small.\” \”You said it very well. This is why your parents have been teaching you how to be a human being since you were very young. They just hope that you will take root deeply and absorb nutrients so that you can grow strong in the future. Growing up. Now that you are older, you spend less and less time with me and my father. I hope you will always remember the teachings we have given you and live a positive life.\” The son seemed a little moved, and his tone became a little… Gentle: \”Mom, don\’t worry, I\’m a good person!\” I smiled, put my hand on his shoulder, and walked side by side together, not like mother and son, but more like friends. I clearly feel that as a mother and a parent, my validity period is getting shorter and shorter, and my influence on my son is getting smaller and smaller. He is drifting away and there is nothing I can do. Fortunately, in the past ten years, we have been carefully guarding him and constantly instilling nutrients into him, so that his little sapling can grow healthily. Now that he is growing vigorously, we can rest assured and gradually let him go. I often collectI received messages from some parents asking me about educating their children. One of the parents impressed me deeply. Her words made me very sad: Teacher, please help me and save my child! Saving him means saving our whole family! A boy of fifteen or sixteen years old dropped out of school and stayed at home, never leaving the house and having no contact with society. You must buy him a mobile phone and allow him to play games before he is willing to go to school. At first glance, many people will say: You are so old, why are you so ignorant? Books are read for yourself, not for your parents! Although he is right, have you ever thought about why he is like this? What was his family environment and education like when he was growing up? After detailed understanding, it turned out that his parents were too doting on him, and they always responded to his requests since he was a child. When he was in kindergarten, he had a slight cold and didn\’t want to go to school. OK, then he would rest at home. When he entered elementary school, he didn\’t want to learn to do housework, OK, so he wouldn\’t do it. When he entered junior high school, he had too much homework and couldn\’t finish his homework at home. OK. , then don’t do it… blindly indulge, the child grows into a wild horse, loose and free, going its own way. Now that I have reached adolescence, I have become more and more lawless and can never be pulled back. Only then do my parents realize the seriousness of the problem, become anxious, and start to think of solutions. Talk to him and reason with him, but if you ignore him, you just won\’t listen. If someone gets tough, he\’ll run away from home. He once said: Do you think I want this? If I get bad grades, I will be criticized by the teacher, but I will not be laughed at by my classmates for anything. I have no friends, and I feel more comfortable only in games. You only blame me, what about yourselves? Why didn\’t you teach me when I was a kid? It makes me look like an idiot now! I hate you! save? Easier said than done? A small sapling is left unattended when it is time to absorb nutrients and take root deeply. When it reaches half its size, it is discovered that it has grown crookedly and is malnourished. No matter how much fertilizer is applied and no matter how carefully cultivated, it will be difficult to straighten it. From now on, we can only work hard to make the best use of it and bring out its value. Sobering and heart-wrenching. I can only advise this parent to sincerely apologize to his child, communicate with him sincerely like a friend, don\’t put too much pressure on him, encourage him, accompany him, make progress bit by bit, and make him a useful person. . But whether they are willing to admit it or not, no matter how hard they try, the results are definitely not as good as before. Because everything has its corresponding season, and they have missed it. Parents have missed the best time for education, and children have missed the best time for growth. Every child is born with a blank piece of paper. Parents play a vital role in the child\’s childhood, as to what kind of work it will be painted into later. Society is a big dyeing vat. Children are exposed to all kinds of people and environments. If they are not careful, they will be painted with messy backgrounds, which will be difficult to change. Parents must be the guardian angels of their children, teach them to distinguish right from wrong and stay away from filth. There is only one life, and there are only a few key steps, and the early childhood period is particularly important. The outlook on life and values ​​are gradually formed from an early age. Parents have the responsibility to be their children\’s first life mentors, help them establish a positive outlook, and guide them in the right direction. Long Yingtai once said: When children are young, their parents are omnipotent to them.Totally dependable. This is the golden period for parents to educate their children. Once the children reach their teenage years, the parents’ “expiration date” is approaching. What should be said, what should be taught, and what should be done should have been done long ago. It is time for acceptance. This acceptance is based on the parents’ educational policy and the child’s ability to adapt to the outside world. No matter how hard parents try after \”expiration\”, they will never be as effective as they were 10 years ago. Yes, as parents, there is also an expiration date. I hope all parents can use this golden time and within the expiration date to teach their children various necessary skills and help them prepare for the future. One day, the children will drift away and we will retire. I hope that on that day, it will not be loss and worry, but mutual trust, both for children and parents. That will be the most beautiful separation in the world, full of hope and joy.