China\’s first remote phone kidnapping case, all parents should take warning

One morning in 2015, Mr. Feng from Xi’an received a phone call. A man claimed that he had kidnapped his son and asked Mr. Feng to prepare 2 million in cash to redeem him. At first, Mr. Feng thought it was a prank and immediately called his son, but his son never answered. Mr. Feng called his wife again. His wife told him that his son had taken the TOEFL test in the morning. The two people rushed to the school to find their son, but the school told them that the child did not come for the exam. Mr. Feng and his wife had only one son, and they had placed great hopes on him since childhood. In addition to strictly requiring his children to study, Mr. Feng also did not allow him to make friends casually, for fear that he would become a bad learner. The child went to a boarding school for high school. In order to take care of their children and prevent them from making bad friends, Mr. Feng and his wife bought a house near the school and urged their children to go home and study every day. The child is also very obedient. Throughout high school, he did nothing but study. He didn\’t even buy anything by himself. His parents would help him buy whatever he needed. After graduating from high school, the child was admitted to a key university in Xi\’an. Mr. Feng and his wife were very pleased and planned to send their child to study in the United States after he finished the TOEFL exam. Unexpectedly, the child was kidnapped at this juncture! Mr. Feng quickly called the police. After testing the kidnapper\’s call on Mr. Feng\’s mobile phone, the police found that the kidnapper\’s call was from Malaysia. But the strange thing is that his son\’s phone signal shows that he is in a certain district in Xi\’an. Could this be a transnational kidnapping gang? The next morning, Mr. Feng received another call from the kidnapper. The kidnappers threatened Mr. Feng that if he did not hand over the money tomorrow, he would chop off his son\’s fingers. The police repeatedly confirmed the child\’s social relationship with Mr. Feng. But the child\’s social relationship is very simple – no girlfriend, not even friends. The people I interact with the most every day are my parents. Even if I go to college, I always go home after school every day. The police asked Mr. Feng again whether his son had been exposed to huge sums of money recently. Mr. Feng thought for a while and said, yes. Because in accordance with the procedures for studying abroad, they deposited 300,000 yuan into their child\’s bank card half a month ago. The police immediately checked the bank card and found that the money had been transferred to a bank card in Malaysia in six installments. After the police searched the location of Mr. Feng’s son’s mobile phone signal, they finally found him in a hotel. But to the shock of the police, when they broke in, they found the boy lying alone on the bed. There were no kidnappers, not even one to keep an eye on him. This scene surprised everyone. What is going on? Under police questioning, the boy told the whole story. On his way to take the TOEFL exam, he received a phone call from a person claiming to be a police officer. The \”police\” said that one of the boy\’s credit cards was found to be involved in a major bribery and money laundering case. The boy asked the other party dubiously: Who do you think I am? The \”police\” immediately reported his name and ID number. In this way, the boy easily believed what the \”police\” said and panicked and asked the \”police\” for help. The \”police\” asked him to reveal his family situation and his parents\’ phone calls. He also told the boy that all his bank cards were not safe and he had to tell them his bank card number and password. Wait for them to transfer the money to a safe place first, and then investigate clearly before transferring it.return. The boy agreed immediately. The \”police\” also told the boy not to tell anyone where he was, including his family. Because his parents have also been involved in money laundering criminal organizations. As long as he obeys the instructions, the \”police\” will slowly help him deal with the matter. The \”police\” also emphasized to him: Don\’t answer any calls, and if there are any text messages, forward them all to the \”police\”. In this way, the boy gave up the exam and found a hotel to stay in a secluded alley. Except for the kidnapper\’s phone calls, he did not answer any calls or reply to any messages. He forwarded all the messages he received to the kidnappers. After reading this incident, you may be thinking, is this boy stupid? In terms of IQ, he is definitely not stupid, otherwise he would not be able to get into a key university. The reason why he lost his judgment and did such unbelievable things is because he has always lacked an ability when he was growing up – the ability to control internally. When people face emergencies, their emotions will fluctuate violently, and strong emotions can affect a person\’s judgment. At this time, people can rely on two ways to adjust their state – rely on themselves; or rely on others. Those who have strong self-regulation skills can quickly self-soothe, allowing them to withdraw from the current crisis environment and view their situation objectively. They are not easy to blindly follow other people\’s suggestions, nor do they easily believe in other people\’s persuasion. And those who are unable to self-regulate in the face of emergencies will either experience anxiety, panic, and nervousness for a long time, and need outside help to adjust their mental state. And \”liars\” can just take advantage of this situation – the \”comfort\” words of the liar are the adjustment and comfort given to them by the outside world. At this time, it is difficult for them not to accept everything. The inner ability to adjust when facing emergencies is gradually formed as a person grows up. As a child grows up, he or she will have many opportunities to deal with emergencies personally. These conditions may seem like minor issues at the time. For example, what should I do if it suddenly rains on the way home but I don’t have an umbrella? What should I do if I realize I forgot to bring my homework when I get to school? What should you do if your best friends suddenly fall out? …. As children deal with \”unsatisfactory\” emergencies, they gradually strengthen their self-regulation abilities. They can learn to adjust their state by themselves rather than by the outside world. Mr. Feng and his wife\’s \”strict\” protection of their son deprived him of the opportunity to develop his inner control ability. He didn\’t even buy the things he needed. All he did in life was study. It is not difficult to develop a child\’s inner regulation skills. As long as parents do not interfere or do what their children should do, every challenge a child faces during his growth may become an opportunity to exercise his inner adjustment ability. Of course, parents can tell their children that when they can\’t think of a solution or need help, they can give them some suggestions and help when necessary. This ability can start to be exercised when the child is very young – when the child falls, encourage him to stand up on his own and continue to do what he just did. Do not exaggerate the harm of this small setback, norBlame the child for being stupid. If your child has a scratch, put a Band-Aid on him, wipe the tears from his face, give him a hug or kiss as a comfort, and tell him what to do to stay safe. Do you really love children? If you love, when the child grows up, you should let go at the right time. This is the way to help children grow better.