I have a shy baby, here’s what I do

According to surveys, about 1/5 of children are shy, and they cannot completely get rid of it as adults. If the child\’s shyness is not changed in time during the critical period of growth, the child is likely to become a sensitive and shy adult when he grows up. So, how does shyness arise and how can it be avoided? Ruirui\’s mother has been a little anxious recently. The teacher sent each parent a singing video from a period before the kindergarten. After watching it carefully, she found that every child came on stage generously, sang with the teacher, and actively interacted. Only Ruirui kept his head down from beginning to end. Under the encouragement and guidance of the teacher, he reluctantly sang a few words, but his face was expressionless and his voice was very low. \”We, Ruirui, have been shy since childhood. Now we are in kindergarten and middle class, but we often don\’t say hello to people when we see them! When I ask him why, he always refuses to say anything!\” Shyness is a very common psychology. State is an important part of human emotions. Everyone is born with some shyness. However, unlike the complex shyness of adults, children\’s shyness is actually just a response to unfamiliar guests or environments. In this example, Ruirui seems to be unsociable and unwilling to interact with others, but in fact, he is interested in external people and things, but he has some worries, sensitivity and worries in his heart, which inhibits them. Interest in external things. There was a scene in the variety show \”Where Are We Going, Dad\”? Wang Shiling went to hold Kimi\’s hand. She held it several times, but Kimi didn\’t respond. At this time, Wang Shiling did not think it was because of herself, but said to her father: \”Kimi.\” Did you wake up?\” Contrary to the confident Wang Shiling, Kimi is a relatively introverted and shy child. He behaves calmly and carefree in front of his father. However, when he meets strangers or comes to an unfamiliar environment, he will become shy because of his shyness. Acting differently than usual. The father, Lin Zhiying, did not worry or even blame the child. Instead, he worked hard to encourage him to explore his own strengths and build up his self-confidence. Niu Niu is a smart little girl who is good at singing. She can hum the songs on her mother’s phone after listening to them several times. Several of her mother\’s good friends knew that she was very smart. Whenever they came to the house as a guest, they would always praise her: \”Niuniu, auntie knows that you are very good at singing. Can you sing a song for us?\” However, after hearing these words, Niu Niu She always shyly grabbed her mother\’s clothes, shook her head, and refused to sing anything. Children are naturally timid, afraid of not doing well enough and afraid of being laughed at. In this example, Niu Niu obviously has very good talents, but she is unwilling to express herself boldly, which shows that she may not know her own strengths, but is worried that she is not good enough. Some children feel that they have no outstanding talents, or find that other children are worse than themselves, so they lose confidence and are afraid that they are not as good as others. And this feeling of underestimating yourself is an important reason for shyness. At this time, some parents will become anxious and blindly blame or complain about their children, or pay too much attention to them, make strict demands on their children, or even sarcastically and picky children., if done too hastily, it will cause the children to worry more about gains and losses and be hesitant to move forward. Therefore, we should encourage children to express themselves boldly and tell them that everyone has their own strengths and everyone will make mistakes, so don\’t be afraid of it. Mingming learned to speak relatively late, and when he was three years old, he could only speak some simple sentences. After entering kindergarten, most children can already express their thoughts freely, but Mingming can still only speak some short sentences. Moreover, Mingming knew that his ability to express himself was worse than that of other children, so he became increasingly silent and would not speak if he could. I would often hold it in until my face turned red, and I wouldn\’t tell the teacher \”I need to go to the toilet.\” I even wet my pants a few times. According to statistics, about 25% of people were not shy when they were very young, but because they encountered some setbacks in the process of growing up and did not correct their psychology in time, they gradually became timid and afraid of not doing enough. Okay, so I have many worries and have developed a shy mentality. Mingming here may be because he had some unknown troubles in the process of learning to speak, which made him feel bruised and even more reluctant to express. Therefore, parents should patiently communicate with their children and open their hearts. Listen carefully to his inner thoughts and help him let go of his burden step by step. Of course, everything has two sides. Shy children also have their own advantages. Expert surveys show that the psychology of shy children is more colorful than other children. They will be better at studying people\’s thoughts and will add their own imagination. Therefore, if children can be helped to overcome this shyness in time, they will have stronger social skills than others when they become adults. However, if it is not overcome in time, over time, it will show personality traits such as introversion, silence, timidity, lack of self-confidence, and lack of assertiveness, and it is likely to continue into adulthood. During the critical period of children\’s personality growth, this is how I treat my children: 1. Fully accept the children. Don\’t force your child to act generous all of a sudden, but get to know your child deeply, find out the real reason why your child is shy, and help him change this mentality step by step. If you find that your child is upset, give him a hug and let him feel that his parents are not making a fuss or blaming him, but will give him full safety and warmth. 2. Encourage children in time. You can choose some simple and easy activities and let the children do it by themselves. When the children achieve results, praise them without hesitation and gradually build up the children\’s self-confidence. Shyness is not a disease, it is just a lack of social experience. Only when a child has sufficient self-confidence will he have the courage to step out of the shadow of shyness. 3. Create opportunities for children. Because children are shy, they will lose many opportunities to express themselves, and in this case, they will also aggravate their shyness and make them even more afraid of expressing themselves in front of others. Therefore, parents can intentionally create some opportunities, such as letting their children speak, sing, and play games with other younger children, so that their children can experience this feeling of being the \”king of children\” and then increase their confidence in themselves and gradually overcome their shyness. . 4. Cultivate children in a targeted manner. ShyChildren have delicate minds and have more unique ideas about people and things. This is an advantage that other children do not have. Therefore, it is necessary to make use of the child\’s advantages and carry out targeted training, such as letting him draw, read, and do more such activities. Activities that require quieter and more patience are needed to give full play to the child\’s strengths, and encourage the child more to show the child\’s strengths to others. In this way, unexpected results will be achieved.