Dong Qing: You should be whatever kind of person you want your child to be.

I just watched CCTV\’s \”Face to Face\” on April 23, and I was very moved. The guest in this issue is Dong Qing. 2017 seems to be a year that belongs to Dong Qing. \”The Reader\”, in which she served as producer and host, became very popular. I watched every episode of \”The Reader\”, but what moved me the most was not Dong Qing\’s performance in a certain episode of \”The Reader\”, but when she was interviewed by \”Face to Face\” and talked about being a mother for the first time. , the attitude when talking about continuing to grow. Dong Qing once chose to leave the stage at the peak of her career and go to the University of Southern California to study as a visiting scholar. Until 2015, Dong Qing returned to CCTV. At this time, she also had an additional identity: mother. Wang Ning asked Dong Qing why she chose to be a mother at this time. Dong Qing did not give too complicated reasons, but just said that this was just following the laws of nature, and she was afraid that she would never have the chance to be a mother after her current age. She said that people have awe of the word forever. She became a mother very naturally in this way. I think that, like all first-time mothers, she may have experienced a period of confusion, not knowing how to give her children the best growth or how to plan for her own future. Dong Qing said that it was a word from a friend that suddenly made her understand. Her friend told her that what kind of person you want your child to be is very simple, you just need to become that person first. The so-called path from complexity to simplicity means that the seemingly most complex questions in the world often have the most direct and simple answers. After thinking about this clearly, Dong Qing began to plan his career development after giving birth to a child. On the one hand, she didn\’t want to give up the possibility of continuing to grow and stop moving forward because of her children; on the other hand, she felt that she should also work hard to become better. In this way, when the child truly understands in the future, he will not only love and respect his mother, but also learn many good qualities from his mother. A mother\’s responsibility should not stop at caring for her children, she should also be a role model for her children, inspire her children, and encourage them to respect, appreciate, and work hard. In recent years, many of my friends have gotten married and had children. After giving birth, many of my friends no longer want to make progress at work, or they quit their jobs directly. They told me that because \”I missed my children too much when I was at work, I really had no intention of working\” and it was too hard to balance work and family, so they quit working as soon as their family\’s financial situation allowed. I have no intention of commenting on this reason for resigning. I just feel that if you really want to take both things into account, it will definitely work. Dong Qing said that she returned to CCTV after giving birth and began to prepare for \”The Reader\”. She is the producer of The Reader, which is a brand new identity for her. She cannot just pick up the experience of being a host, but must learn from scratch how to be a producer and how to coordinate a team. She must continue to grow. . The challenges Dong Qing faced in the workplace after giving birth were obviously more challenging than most new mothers. But she still manages to balance the roles of a career woman and a new mother. The secret to both is to strike a balance. Dong Qing said that she must find a balance in the world of herself and her children, neither \”my world is only me\” nor \”my world is only him.\” Let your independent identity be with your childrenThe role of the son is integrated into one\’s own life at the same time, which is a kind of wisdom. And this kind of wisdom is also an ability that parents must possess. Dong Qing\’s parents both graduated from Fudan University. Every summer vacation when he was a child, his parents made a reading list for Dong Qing. Therefore, reading became a recreational activity in Dong Qing\’s youth, and it was also like a required homework. Some people say that parents who want their children to study during summer vacation are too strict. But I think that even if her parents don\’t arrange reading tasks for Dong Qing during the holidays, Dong Qing will be happy to read. Because her parents, who graduated from Fudan University, must also love reading and have a rich collection of books at home. Children who grow up in such an environment will naturally fall in love with reading. And it is conceivable that Dong Qing, who loves reading, is intellectual, and never gives up on growing up, will also teach by words and deeds and pass on these excellent qualities to her children. This is what she said in the interview: \”What kind of person do you want your child to be? It\’s very simple. What kind of person do you want to be first?\” In other words, what kind of person you are, your child What kind of person will he become. If you want your children to love reading, it’s very simple. You should read carefully first and complete in-depth reading in high-quality books, instead of lying on the sofa and playing with your mobile phone when you get home, yelling loudly and only playing games. Children who are studying; if you want your children to love sports and have a wide range of friends, it is very simple. You can take your children to climb mountains and play ball, or maintain the habit of fitness yourself, instead of sitting at home watching TV after work and being a homebody; you want your children to love sports and make friends. If you want to know how to love and have a happy family in the future, you should first take good care of your lover, let your children learn how to love from you, and let your children grow up in a harmonious and beautiful environment. There is a saying: Loving parents is the best Tutoring. That\’s the truth. Instruction through words and deeds has a subtle power and will affect a child\’s life unconsciously. Some time ago, a reader asked me. She said that she bought a lot of books for her children, but her children just didn’t read. She was very angry and asked me how I should educate disobedient children. I am not a parenting expert, but I feel that her child is not a hopeless \”disobedient child\”. So, I asked her: \”You bought a lot of books for your children, but how many books did you buy for yourself? Do you have a lot of books at home that you often read?\” \”I\’m already married and have children, what books should I read? I don’t read it, and it’s a waste to buy it. Now I just think about raising my child well.” This mother looked like a broken person to herself, but she was very anxious about her child. But after hearing this, I was just dumbfounded. It is too difficult for a family that doesn\’t like reading to raise a child who loves reading. I remember when I was a child, my mother didn\’t force me to read every day. I just often went to my mother\’s house and groped around on the bookshelf, and especially liked to read the \”adult books\” my mother read. My mother has a set of \”A Dream of Red Mansions\” reviewed by Zhi Yanzhai. She has read it so many times that the pages have turned yellow. When I was a child, I read this set of \”Dream of Red Mansions\” by myself. When I was 12 years old, I read the entire book. That was the first time I read \”A Dream of Red Mansions\”. No one forced me to do it. It was all based on my personal wishes. After reading \”A Dream of Red Mansions\”, I felt thatI felt a special sense of accomplishment because I felt that I had finished reading the \”adult books\” that my mother loved to read. After that, the habit of reading continues to this day. Growth is not a mysterious thing. It is very simple to hope that children will grow up well, as long as parents do not give up on their own growth. Don\’t wait until your children grow up and then say to them: \”Mom gave up her career, her life, and her chance to grow for you.\” Don\’t treat your unwillingness to work harder or continue to grow. The laziness is attributed to the children, and the children will not appreciate it. It is better to study hard and learn from Dong Qing. After giving birth to a child, use the child as motivation to continue to work hard and grow, thereby forging a new and better self. This kind of growth makes me happy and respected by my children. As for the reasons and direction for your own growth after giving birth, it is very simple. What kind of person do you want your child to become, and what kind of person do you want to become first? I hope our lives will make our children proud. In that way, our children\’s future will also become our pride. This is like a kind of reincarnation, and it is also the most concise and clear truth in the world.