Mom’s “It doesn’t matter” is a poison

How do you deal with your children when they make mistakes? What if he bursts into tears? We are always told to treat children gently and tolerantly, to give them enough sense of security, and not to hurt their young hearts. Therefore, when a child does something wrong, we sometimes comfort him: \”It doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter, it\’s okay.\” However, saying \”it doesn\’t matter\” too much can be a kind of poison, and children can easily get poisoned. If you don’t believe it, take a look at the story of this little rabbit. One day, the little rabbit spilled the milk. She kept crying, kept crying, kept crying… Mother Rabbit rushed over and said to the little rabbit: \”It doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter.\” From then on, whenever the little rabbit made a mistake, she would say to herself: \” It doesn\’t matter!\” \”It doesn\’t matter!\” \”It doesn\’t matter!\” \”Okay, that\’s enough!\” Mother Rabbit said, \”Now I\’m going to punish you and get out of the house right away!\” \”It doesn\’t matter!\” The little rabbit walked outside and met Mother Frog, The mother frog asked the little rabbit: \”Have you seen my little frog? She is missing! The milk is gone, the table is gone, the stool and the candle are gone! How strange!\” \”No, I didn\’t see it! \”Okay, okay, forget it if you didn\’t see it, but I think you\’d better open your eyes, as if a wolf is trying to figure you out!\” \”Oh, this hole is so fun!\” said the little rabbit to himself. Said to himself. Suddenly, the little rabbit stumbled and fell… right on the little frog\’s table! \”You spilled my milk!\” said the little frog. \”It doesn\’t matter!\” \”The cup is broken too!\” \”It doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter…\” \”Oh, it\’s on fire!\” \”It doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter!\” It started to smoke, and it became more and more smokey, and the coughing got worse! The wolf started to cough, and the cough got worse and worse, and the cough got worse and worse! The little rabbit floated up and down, and then fell down…and landed at the wolf\’s feet. \”Ouch… Ouch…\” \”It hurts so much!\” \”Is it okay?\” Little Rabbit asked her mother nervously. \”It doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter, it doesn\’t matter at all, it doesn\’t matter at all!\” \”You\’re wrong, it does matter, it\’s very important, it\’s very important, it\’s very important!\” Woooooooooooo! \”Of course, it must be serious if you fall and hurt.\” Mother Rabbit said. \”…But there are many more important things than this!\” *The story comes from the work \”Never mind!\” by (French) Michel van Zeffren. 》So, when a child makes a mistake, we don’t need to get angry and speak harshly, but we must clearly tell him what he did wrong and what the consequences are. Because our tolerance may become \”it doesn\’t matter\” in the eyes of the child; and he can easily, or even be happy to, acquire this \”it doesn\’t matter\” attitude and treat everything nonchalantly. In the long run, how to cultivate his sense of responsibility and responsibility! Don’t let our “it doesn’t matter” become a poison. It’s time to hold your child accountable and make him feel sad and guiltyWhen the situation arises, he should be allowed to bear it and face it. This is the growth he must experience.