How can a stay-at-home mother keep her children after being divorced?

In the 11th episode of the TV series \”The First Half of My Life\”, Chen Junsheng, who was cheating and divorced, wanted to steal the child from Luo Zijun. Luo Zijun, who has been working full-time for N years, has almost completely lost his ability to make a living. In order to fight for the custody of her child, she had to have a job. For this reason, she worked as a promoter in a supermarket and as a salesperson at a luxury goods counter in a shopping mall. In order to prove to the judge that her family can help take care of the children, she needs the whole family to appear in court and perform a harmonious scene. However, Luo\’s mother has become dissatisfied with her second son-in-law Bai Guang. They are like mortal enemies and there will be a quarrel within three minutes of meeting. At the entrance of the court, Zijun bowed to his mother, sister and brother-in-law and thanked his family for their cooperation because \”today is very important to me.\” That scene made me burst into tears. A divorced stay-at-home mother feels so terrified and helpless when faced with the possibility of losing her child! Children have different meanings and weights for working mothers and stay-at-home mothers. Although every mother loves her children, working mothers do not necessarily love their children less than stay-at-home mothers. But for stay-at-home mothers, in addition to being children, their children are also their emotional and spiritual sustenance, where all their efforts and career lie. If a stay-at-home mother is divorced and loses another child, she will really have nothing. Zijun in the play has no job, love and marriage, and her children are everything to her. Regarding the cheating Chen Junsheng, I somewhat understood him at first. It was not unreasonable for him to be attracted to Ling Ling. Seeing him in various dilemmas, I even felt that this man was actually quite pitiful. However, when he hired a lawyer to file a lawsuit and wanted to sue Zijun as the plaintiff in an attempt to steal the child, I not only hated him, I even wanted to hate him on Zijun\’s behalf. A dad wants his own kids, I understand. However, he should not compete with a woman who lives full time at home and has nothing but her son, otherwise he will push this woman to a dead end. Although Zijun won the lawsuit in the play, her victory was not without any suspense. She was almost defeated and lost her last spiritual support. Changing places, if I were to encounter this situation: my husband cheated on me and snatched the child away, I am afraid that the only way to calm the overwhelming hatred in my heart is to kill him and set him on fire. You cheated on me and want to divorce me: Get out! If you get divorced and take away my children: die! Li Li married from the countryside to a county town. Her husband cheated on her daughter when she was less than two years old. The cheating partner was introduced by her mother-in-law. It is said that the woman\’s family has been full of boys for generations, and she is the only daughter. Her mother-in-law thinks that she will probably give birth to a son. When Li Li found out, the woman was already pregnant. Li Li\’s family lives in a rural area and she has been weak and meek since she was a child. She didn\’t want to get divorced, but her mother-in-law and husband forced her to leave because the mistress and her \”son\” wanted to take over. Her husband works in a company in the county town and has a house and a job, which Li Li does not have. She wanted a daughter, but her husband and mother-in-law refused to give her. Her relatives also advised her not to have children so that she could remarry later. In desperation, Li Li left home and returned to her parents\’ home. When they divorced, they agreed that they could see their children once a month. When the day came to visit their daughter, Li Li failed every time: the locks on the front door had been changed, no one knocked on the door, and no one answered the phone. Li, who hasn’t seen his child in half a yearLi, with the help of relatives, sued her ex-husband to fulfill her promise to visit her children. After the husband agreed, Li Li still couldn\’t see the child. Every time she went, her ex-husband always said that the child was not at home, either taken out to play by her grandma, or taken back to the countryside by her grandma, with a lot of excuses. Li Li wanted to cry but had no tears, and there was no way to ask for help. She bought clothes and toys for her children and placed them in front of their house, but neighbors told her that these things would always be thrown away by her ex-mother-in-law. More than a year later, Li Li finally saw the child with the mercy of her ex-husband. However, the child no longer recognized her and said to her: \”You are not my mother. My mother is at home.\” She regarded her stepmother as My biological mother. The ex-husband said that the child did not know that it was the stepmother and that there was no psychological shadow. She and the stepmother were very close. He said that for the sake of the child, he suggested that Li Li should not visit her, not recognize the child, and let the child never know. Li Li was speechless. Several years have passed, and now that the child has entered elementary school, Li Li has only seen her from a distance a few times in front of her school. Li Li understood that she had completely lost her child, as if she had never been born… Xiaofei\’s husband had cheated on her, and she found clues from her husband\’s belongings. After several suspicions and guesses, Xiao Fei chose to ask her husband directly. She hoped that her husband would deny her suspicion and give a reasonable explanation. Then, her husband calmly admitted it. He apologized to her and said that he was wrong, but he did not say that he would correct the mistake or that he wanted a divorce. What he means is that he hopes both sides can coexist peacefully. Xiaofei was angry and sad, but more importantly, she felt sad. This man doesn\’t even bother to find excuses to deceive himself. He eats himself to death and looks down on him. He is sure that he can\’t leave this family and that she can\’t pull any tricks. If her husband apologizes to Xiao Fei and promises her that he will never find a mistress again, just like in countless bloody TV dramas, Xiao Fei intends to forgive him, and she will only make a fuss for a while at most. However, his calmness and indifference made Xiao Fei completely despair of this marriage. After a few days, she figured it out and decided to leave this scumbag. Xiaofei quietly consulted a lawyer and received the following information: The house was her husband\’s pre-marital property. As a full-time mother, she had no job and no ability to raise children. If her husband wanted to fight for the children, she would probably not win. For this reason, Xiaofei endured it for a year before filing for divorce. During this year, the child went to kindergarten, she also found a job, and even got evidence of his cheating. In the end, Xiaofei got the custody of the child, and she also took the lion\’s share in the division of property. Xiao Fei said: \”In one year, I won a child and more property, it was worth it!\” Whether it is Luo Zijun in the TV series or reader Xiao Fei, the key to winning the lawsuit and keeping their children is: self-reliance and having a job , with the ability to raise children. In my tweet in April, \”How will a 40-year-old stay-at-home mother get divorced, have no job and raise two children?\” I once said: You can be a stay-at-home mother, but please maintain the ability to return to work or start a business. You can be raised by others, but you must not be \”wasted\” by being raised. You don’t have to make a living, but you must not lose the ability to make a living. Today I would like to add a sentence: If there is no way to make a living,If you don\’t have enough power, you will lose even your children. Many readers have asked: I know nothing, have no high education, no work experience, no special skills, and no funds to start a business. As a stay-at-home mother, I am busy every day and I am getting older. How can I make a living? Ability? I want to say that the most important thing is that you have to have a sense of crisis. Without a high degree of education and good work experience, you may have no hope of becoming a white-collar worker in the workplace. But as long as you work hard, it is still possible to find a job that is not demanding. Without capital and entrepreneurial experience, you may have no hope of becoming a big boss. But as long as you are willing and accumulate more every day, you still have a good chance of starting a small business. Without time and no longer young, you may have no hope of becoming a professional. But if you have a little more knowledge than the average person in a certain direction, you should be able to do it. A score of 90 is hopeless, but a score of 60 should not be difficult. In today\’s era of rapid development and extreme diversification, the means of making a living are unusually abundant. If you have enough sense of crisis, you should look for opportunities in the usual trivial food, oil, salt, sauce and vinegar. Maybe you like makeup, maybe you like shopping, maybe you like cooking food, or you like taking care of children, you like cleaning the house, you like online shopping, you like reading, you like dancing… Don’t underestimate any interest, develop it well, and it may become your livelihood. rely on.