True enrichment is to give children a sense of security

The day before yesterday, after breakfast, I was reading in my room, and my son shouted to me: \”Mom, I\’m going to the library to return books and borrow them!\” After that, he went out in a hurry. After a while, I stood up and walked around to move my body. I accidentally caught a glimpse of a pile of books on the sofa, which was what my son was going to take back. The library has regulations that allow you to borrow ten books at a time, provided that you return the previously borrowed books. This is a big haha! It\’s a waste of time. I couldn\’t help but laugh. Since we moved, it has been less convenient for us to go to the library. The new library is far away from us, about half an hour\’s walk one way. My son didn’t want to take the bus. He said walking was good, so he treated it as exercise. Even so, it took an hour to go back and forth, and the weather was hot. In the end, he had to return empty-handed. He must have felt disappointed and guilty, and it was quite distressing to think about it. It was noon when my son came home sweating profusely with a flat backpack. He glanced at me embarrassedly and laughed at himself: \”Oh, look at my memory, I actually forgot to bring the book back. However, I read a book there, a science fiction and suspense genre, it was really good…\” Look Looking at his face which was red with heat, I quickly handed him some water to drink. I said: \”Are you thirsty? Drink water quickly. It doesn\’t matter. Just remember to bring it with you next time. Although you didn\’t borrow any books today, you read books in the library and exercised, and you gained a lot. In the future, Every time before you go out, don\’t panic and take stock of what you need to bring.\” The child feels very uncomfortable when he fails to accomplish something. He is also aware of his own problems and has to worry about criticism and scolding from his parents. At this time, as parents, we should not add insult to injury by criticizing and accusing them, but should first comfort them, tell them \”it\’s okay\”, \”it\’s okay\”, \”it doesn\’t matter\”, so that they don\’t be nervous and sad, and then analyze it from the positive side, and finally tactfully Remind them what to pay attention to next time. In this way, children will feel the understanding and care from their parents, their mood will get better soon, and they will do better next time. Yesterday, my son had breakfast, put the books he wanted to return into his backpack, took his library card and water, and happily went to the library again. He came back around noon, carrying a bag full of books, all of which he loved to read. He happily told me about whom he met in the library, and his face was filled with happiness. At three o\’clock in the afternoon, he is going to learn to swim. Before setting off, he lowered his head and felt a little depressed, losing the excitement of the first two days. I asked him what was wrong, and he said that the coach said that he was too nervous, stiff and not relaxed enough. If he continued like this, he would not be able to learn even if he studied for a month. I understand, he is worried that he will not be able to learn. We chose a pair of small classes of five. He is the oldest among these children. If others have learned but he has not learned, he will feel very embarrassed. I tried my best to say in a relaxed tone: \”Son, it\’s okay. When we signed up, the coach had already promised that we would teach and swim, so don\’t worry. Just remember the skills taught by the coach and try to relax as much as possible when swimming. Nothing else.\” Don\’t even think about it, it will be fine.\” \”Really? Is it guaranteed to teach me?\” My son then raised his head and looked at me, his eyes shining brightly. \”Of course, go ahead and relax.\” I replied with a smile and certainty.answer. You could feel him sighing in relief and going out happily. When he came home after studying, I saw that he was very happy, so I asked, \”Did you make a lot of progress today?\” He said yes, and he made a lot of progress. In order to further encourage him, I told him about my experience of learning to drive. I told him: It was really painful at first. I felt like an idiot and couldn\’t master it. I wanted to give up several times. But I still gritted my teeth and persevered, carefully pondered what the coach said, studied hard and practiced hard, and slowly I found the feeling. I was the one least favored by the coach, but I was the only one among the four who passed all subjects at once. Looking back, those pains and difficulties are really nothing. As long as you persist and believe in yourself, you will definitely be able to master it. \”Yeah, I will persevere. I will definitely learn it.\” The son\’s face was full of confidence. Everyone has times when they are timid and helpless, let alone children. At this time, parents’ encouragement is particularly important. A word of encouragement and comfort can help them eliminate their anxiety, muster up courage, and move forward with confidence. How can we make children feel happy and confident? In fact, it is very simple, as long as they fully feel safe and cared for by their parents. A sense of security is the most important quality of life indicator and the biggest factor in measuring a person\’s happiness, and this is no different for parents and children. The feeling of security in childhood is very important. If a person does not obtain a good sense of security in childhood, he may not be able to get rid of the psychological shadow of insecurity throughout his life. If there is a source of uneasiness in a child\’s heart, the child will be unable to concentrate on studying and have a depressed personality; at the most severe level, many fears will sprout, which may eventually turn into misfortune. And this is equivalent to destroying a good child. Psychologists point out that from the formation of the living body to the individual development and maturity of the child, what is most needed during this period is a sense of security. This initial sense of security in life is called primitive security. A child\’s original sense of security is given by his parents and will affect the child\’s life. If parents are unable to take care of their children, the children will feel insecure. Many parents feel that they are fully confident in taking care of their children, but they do not know that their own anxiety can also cause emotional disorders in their children. When children make mistakes or encounter difficulties while growing up, parents should try to be calm, help analyze the problem in a calm tone, encourage them, and care for their young minds. Let the children understand: Mom and Dad will always love them, don’t worry, don’t be afraid, do it bravely, tomorrow will be better. Children who have a sense of security are full of confidence and sunshine, calm and detached. True enrichment is to give children enough security so that they will not dwell on the past, not be afraid of the future, and spend this life bravely and happily.