What can adults do when a child loses his temper?

In the early days of raising children, I was a parent with a bad temper. When I saw my children imitating me and throwing things out, I realized the impact of parents\’ emotional handling methods on their children, and I began to curb my temper. Slowly, I began to learn about parenting, but I still had no way to deal with my child’s temper. Later, in a conversation with the teacher, the teacher said that mothers also need successful experience in raising children, but I looked back and it seemed that every time I said to practice again, I never succeeded. The first real success came when my daughter was 3 years old. I forgot why my daughter lost her temper, but at that time she lost her temper and threw the oranges out of her hand. If it were before, I might have gotten angry all of a sudden, or I didn\’t know what to do, but that time, I very calmly said to my child: \”Well, mom knows you are very angry now, but you can\’t throw things when you are angry.\” , please pick it up.\” Of course the daughter refused to pick it up and continued to cry. I waited, and while I was waiting, she was still very angry, crying, shouting, and stamping her feet in anger. I immediately said: \”Well, you can stamp your feet when you are angry.\” At this time, my daughter looked at me and immediately started stamping her feet. I didn\’t speak during this process, I just stayed with her silently, waiting for her to calm down. I can’t remember everything that happened next. I only remember hugging my daughter and picking up the oranges she threw away. What I remember deeply is that it was the first time I had faced a child’s emotions for such a long time, and my own emotions were not affected. Slowly, every time I faced the emotions of myself and my children, I began to consciously observe myself and my children, and accumulated personal experience. Experience 1: When dealing with children’s emotions, we practice staying calm and not letting the children’s emotions affect our emotions. Lesson 2: When a child has emotions, accept the child’s emotions. There is no right or wrong in emotions, any emotion is just an expression of a child. Experience 3: Children’s incorrect ways of venting should be corrected and children should be told what to do when they lose their temper. Later, because I realized that my emotions were largely influenced by my family of origin and had nothing to do with my children, I made an agreement with my daughter. When she was about 4 years old, I said to my daughter: There is a hole in my mother\’s heart. This hole is usually invisible. Sometimes it will come out on its own. When it comes out, my mother may not be able to control herself. Quarrel with you. But mom doesn\’t want to quarrel with you. I want to make an agreement with you. If mom says \”pause now, I want to stay by myself for a while\”, then mom will set a time on her phone, and when the time is up, mom will come out to find you. You can read or do other things outside. I don\’t know if my daughter understood this agreement at the time, but later on when I said \”pause, please give mom some time\”, my daughter was very cooperative. I would process my own emotions in the room first, and then come out and face my child\’s emotions. Gradually, my daughter also learned this method. I don’t know when it started. When she was angry, she would say: \”Now I want to be alone.\”Then I will go to my room and we will come back to talk after calming down. Of course, after all, the child is still young. In some cases, I will give her some \”steps\” in a timely manner to help her get out of her emotions.