Being a boy is actually not easy, please love him well

What is a boy\’s world like? \”Time flies so fast! You are already a little man.\” \”No, I am an adult. I have grown up.\” \”You are an adult now, so you shouldn\’t be afraid of sleeping alone, right?\” \”Ugh!\” Then it was gone. These little guys don\’t look like men in any way. Sometimes they are shyer than girls, and sometimes they are more timid than girls. What about the promised generosity of a man? Not at all. Sometimes I cry when I talk about it, and my aggrieved look is even worse than Lin Daiyu\’s. But when it comes to skin, it\’s all a virtue. Use endless energy and fight endless fights. They are also the ones who often cause trouble. But if we don’t raise them well, it really won’t work. Because there will be a good girl related to him, because he will become a husband. There is a child also connected to him! Because he\’s going to be a dad. The concept of raising a boy is the same as raising a girl, and the love of parents is the same. But in some actual parenting processes, there will still be some differences. Because their world has its fascinating parts, but also its parts that make you worry. Please open the boy\’s world correctly. Because being a boy is actually not easy, please love him well! Look! That\’s the evaporation of testosterone. Why are boys more aggressive, more adventurous, and more emotionally agitated? This was set by the Creator at that time, and the boy\’s vigorous vitality can be said to be a godsend. Because boys have 15 times more testosterone than girls, and serotonin, which makes people feel calm, is much lower in boys than girls. So don\’t expect a boy to be quiet and behave all day long. I remember that before my son went to kindergarten, I would take him out for a walk every evening. From the moment I go out, I feel like I\’m on Hot Wheels. I never stop for a moment in the square, either sticking my butt up in front of you, patting myself and saying, \”Come after me!\” Or say, \”Dad, if you don\’t run away, I\’ll eat you!\” and then chase me behind. Trying to be weird in every possible way, but just can\’t stop. If you say \”be quiet\” or \”don\’t run\”, it\’s useless. This is just natural. The only thing we can do is keep him safe and run with him. But now, even if he comes home from school, he will always look for opportunities to have fun with me. If it pisses you off. Say be careful and I\’ll spank you. \”Come on! Come and hit me!\” He is eager for you to have a fight with him. Look, this is the \”aggressive\” boy. Don\’t always tell him to be quiet, be quiet. Because of the effects of testosterone in the body, they sometimes really can\’t control it and don\’t know how to express it. In reality, many boys’ hands and feet are tied. I still remember our former neighbor, who also had a four or five-year-old boy at home. Every time I meet that kid in the park, he always has to behave. Once the child has climbed a little higher, or follow a friend to the bush. His grandma would appear immediately and say, \”Come back quickly. If you don\’t come back, I\’ll leave immediately.\” Sometimes she would say, \”It\’s dangerous there! Come here quickly. If you don\’t come back, I\’ll go home.\” These threats added up. If you are given a warning, tell the child to come over quickly and obediently. But I can feel the expression in the child\’s eyesSomething to come. That is the yearning of birds for the sky, and the dandelions waiting for the wind to come. They are born little hunters, not small pets that want to be leashed. If you have boys at home, you must remember not to tie their hands and feet. Many parents feel that boys are obviously more stubborn than girls. Especially if there are children at home, parents will feel the difference even more. Why are boys so stubborn compared to girls who are considerate? I found that for a while, the little guy was particularly unwilling to accept setbacks and acted very stubborn. We have talked about some stubbornness in previous articles, which are caused by the sensitive period of order. This period generally occurs between the ages of 0 and 6, and the performance at each stage is different. There is a characteristic that children insist on something almost like a demon. The child will cry and fuss because the order is broken, but once the order is restored, the child will calm down immediately. For example, the most common door opening. The door downstairs in our house must be opened by him every time we go out. No one can open it. Even if you open it, he will cry and ask you to close it and let him open it again. For example, when climbing the stairs to go home, he will always be the first one and say that he is the first one. Just put yourself first. This kind of stubbornness can be accepted by anyone who really understands children. Our compliance shows our parents\’ understanding, not doting. Because after a year, my son no longer cares who opens the door, nor does he care about his ranking when walking up the stairs. In fact, children will naturally get better once they pass that stage. On the contrary, some parents who don\’t understand their children like to take advantage of others. I think you must listen to me today. Using parental authority to suppress children harms their sense of security and their inner nature. Why is it better to take care of girls during the same order-sensitive period? Because their emotional development is earlier than that of boys, they will be more sensible. We will find that a little change in daily life, or a slightly stricter tone from mother or father, may make the little boy more irritable and restless, and sometimes even secretly cry alone. For boys in stubborn mode, acceptance from their parents is the most precious gift. If you force your child not to do something or force him to accept your ideas and opinions, this can create real frustration in your child. Very simple things are often messed up by excessive wrong love. Please accept the boy\’s \”late maturity\”. Compared with girls, boys develop later physically, especially emotionally. So we will find an interesting phenomenon: many little boys are obviously stronger, why do they always lose when they grab things with girls? Why do boys and girls quarrel, and the girl is relieved, but the boy is confused and doesn\’t know what to do? Why are boys always criticized by teachers, saying they are not as good as girls? And why do girls write more love letters to boys? That\’s because their emotions are more fragile, and girls are more sensible. For example, when Xiao Xiaoyu and his cousin who are two months younger are together, they basically lose every time they fight over something. Even if he is strong, he can\’t use it. Comparing boys when they were young, they were not as good as girls in many places. In fact, it is much more than that. Overall, boys\’ ability to adapt after going to school is not as good as girls. YouyanResearch shows that from the day they start school, boys develop literacy skills two years behind girls. But our expectations for boys are not low at all. Some parents will definitely object, saying that their boys are among the best in school and cannot be compared to some girls. This is definitely the case, because boys with delicate emotions and a girlish personality are more likely to become academic leaders. However, most boys lag behind girls, and even their finger nerves develop later than girls, so it is more difficult for boys to hold a pencil and write beautiful Chinese characters. Physiology has found that the development level of the language area of ​​​​the brain of a 5-year-old boy can only reach the level of a 3-and-a-half-year-old girl. So boys will have a lot of difficulty learning. For example, one time my son’s class was preparing for a final performance. Girls do almost all the procedures. The script was drawn by girls and the rehearsals were organized by girls. And what about the boys? Play your own heroic role and listen to the girl\’s arrangements. Or I went to the props team and used knives, rulers and tape to stick them in every day. After the performance that day, my son stood in the props group and said that he was very happy to make props for his classmates, and he was still willing to do it even if he cut his finger. His mother asked him why he didn\’t choose to act as his own hero? He said, \”Because I like making props.\” In fact, he was not ready! \”When you are ready, will you give it a try?\” \”I\’ll think about it!\” Saying this is also to protect your own little self-esteem! Never attack a boy\’s shortcomings. Don’t send them to daycare or childcare center prematurely. Because separation makes boys before the age of 3 more susceptible to separation anxiety. And boys will react more violently than girls. For boys under 3 years old, it is far better to be cared for by attentive relatives or responsible nannies than to go to day care. For little ones, they need to spend a lot of time with their caregivers, who have a special significance to the child. In a loving and relaxed environment, nature can bloom. In a world that accepts yourself, you can learn how to accept others and how to express your emotions. The most important lesson for boys is to learn to have a close relationship with the person who cares for them and to trust that person – so that they are warm inside and understand the kindness of others. This is a very important psychological foundation for them to enter their teenage years. And it will also affect how he will be a husband and father in the family in the future. If you have a boy at home, please love him!