Mom and Dad, it’s okay! I have become accustomed to you not being around. The truth is heartbreaking…

A few days ago, in a variety show, Huang Shengyi and his son Andy participated in a question session. He was asked, \”Does Andy feel lonely when his parents are busy at work?\” Huang Shengyi said guiltily that his son \”should be lonely.\” But the son\’s answer was: \”I\’m not alone, I\’m used to it.\” When he said this, he still had a cute smile on his face, but this moment made the parents feel sad. Hearing her son\’s answer, she choked and said: \”He looks cool and doesn\’t say much, but he is actually very soft on the inside and not too exposed. All of his exposed emotions are what he wants you to see.\” , but he won’t let you see the real emotions.” Every mother will shed tears when she hears her child say this. Because little children can sometimes be so sensible that it makes people feel distressed. In fact, children\’s hearts are the most sensitive. But I heard that they sometimes hide their little thoughts. Just to get closer to my parents. Just like sometimes my son and I are crowded on the sofa. Sometimes I deliberately put my shoulders against him and then put a little pressure on him to test his reaction. Every time he wouldn\’t say anything, but would lean closer to her. The same is true when sleeping with him. When you hold him tightly, he will not push away, but will just say, Daddy, you are holding him too tightly! But what about us? Sometimes I feel a little unsatisfied and feel depressed. The child is jumping around him and bumping into him. Maybe he just yelled, \”Be quiet, don\’t touch me.\” I\’ve told you many times not to make such a fuss. We often say that we are willing to give anything for our children. But in reality, the time spent with children is getting less and less. Is there any child in the world who has never longed to be with his parents? It\’s just that they didn\’t say it out loud. Maybe reality has already changed the children\’s hearts and made them accustomed to it. Compliance and habit are the only comforts we have to make ourselves feel better when we face hopeless situations. Not to mention a small child. And if there are, the children won’t talk about it. They may even put up a stubborn face and tell you it’s okay. I remember that when my son was more than two years old, he lived with his grandma in the countryside. My wife and I would rush back every weekend just to spend more time with him. At night, he didn\’t want to sleep with us and had to go find his grandma. But I will try my best to tell him stories, show him stickers, and play games with him. Finally stayed in our room. And when we left on Sunday afternoon. Tell him: \”Mom and dad have gone to work! Be obedient, baby! Come and say goodbye!\” He seems to be fine, but he will never wave goodbye to you. If you observe carefully, you will see that he usually likes to wave goodbye to other people. Why did he turn his head and ignore us when we left? In fact, there was already deep reluctance in Xiao Xiao\’s heart. Maybe he didn\’t even understand what kind of feeling it was and couldn\’t express it. But I felt the desire in his heart. There is also the growing time that disappears day by day and will never come back again, ticking away. Many parents think that their children will grow up naturally and just need to feed them enough to sleep well. Is this really going to happen? A few days ago, a business friend asked for help in the groupHelp, my son who is in primary school is addicted to games every day. No one in the family can say anything. If you talk too much, he may even stay out all night. If you take away his cell phone, he will go crazy. Moreover, I have been invited to the school for interviews by teachers many times. I remember we met once when his son was in kindergarten a few years ago. Chat with him that time. He said that those who want to take care of their children are too pretentious. It is fine to leave the children at home to be looked after by the elderly. You don’t need to worry about this or that at all. He said that being able to earn money, send his children to a good school, and buy him a house or car in the future would be more useful than anything else. In his eyes, companionship is meaningless compared to business. So the children have always been taken care of by the elderly. As a result, the old man obeyed the child in everything and had no control over it. So my child is only in the second grade of elementary school and is already an experienced mobile game player. I really don’t know what he is thinking now. I heard that his business has become very big, but it is just as he said. \”My son\’s problems are more troublesome than my business.\” When parents beat their chests one day and teach their children a lesson. What I regret most in my heart is probably that I didn’t raise my children well back then. I just wish I could do it all over again. She lamented that she didn’t understand her own biological child at all. I once said in an article: \”I think the greatest harm to a child is that you are invisible when the child needs you most. And when the child grows up and does not need you, you are tight Follow, step by step.\” Many parents were deeply moved. A mother left a message saying that this is how she got here. When I was a child, my parents didn\’t care about me, but when it was time to take the college entrance examination, they showed up. Tell yourself which university you want to attend and which major you want to choose. In fact, at that time, she had already made plans to go to other provinces, the farther away the better. Because she is used to her parents not being around. The best gift a parent can give their children is their time. Especially in the first 7 years of your child’s life, you must spend more time with your child. Don\’t let your children get used to you not being around. In 1964, the great British director Michael Apted, who had filmed 007, began to record 14 7-year-old British children. He would find these children every 7 years and take pictures of their latest conditions, so \”14 Up\” was created. , \”21Up\”, \”28Up\”, \”32Up\”, \”42Up\”, \”49Up\”, until 2013, the children became the elderly in \”56Up\”. It tells the life experiences of 14 children from the age of 7 to 56, silently asking for the answers that determine life. This is not just an unprecedented and thought-provoking documentary, or in other words, it is a sociological research report questioning the fate of ordinary people. We look at the protagonists in the film, see them start from childhood, slowly grow older, see them struggle hard, and see them struggle in vain. From them, we more or less see our own shadow. In this documentary, we get a glimpse into the lives of ordinary British people. The lives of those people all confirmed the director\’s initial speculation. The influence of childhood family is indelible on a child\’s life. Each episode of the film begins with a sentence: \”Let me take care of a child until he is seven years old. From now on, you can take care of him as you wish. Let him grow up as he pleases, and whatever he will become.\”Such people are destined. \”One of the protagonists in the film said something to encourage everyone when he was 56 years old, \”The best gift parents can give their children is their time. It is very important to accompany them as they grow. \”Director Michael said, \”Observing the growth trajectory of these 14 children is both \”interesting\” and \”chilling.\” Some people have a certain understanding and vision of life and society very early on; some people are busy worrying about their livelihood every day for their entire lives. \”Everyone who has watched the film will notice that there is a child who lives in a boarding school where no one cares about him. His name is Paul. When he was 7 years old, he didn\’t have any dreams. He just hoped to be beaten less and made to stand less often. The sad and helpless little face made people feel heartbroken under the black and white lens in 1964. Although he found many jobs as an adult, he was frequently unemployed. In his later years, he could only find a job in a nursing home where his wife worked. He works as a small repairman. Is he suffering from low self-esteem because he did not receive a good education as a child, or is he lacking perseverance due to his natural cowardice? No one knows the answer. Is there such a person around you? This film allows us to see an important reality: no one can deny that different family environments and family conditions have a huge impact on the growth of children. In this era of \”dad\”, parents\’ own struggle and efforts are necessary . Because we must work hard to give our children better growth conditions, so that they can have more opportunities. But when you are trying to move forward, don’t forget to spend more time with your children. And whether you are poor or rich, this is yours What you can give to your children.