What should you do if your child cries when he first enters kindergarten? How to deal with admission anxiety? You have to do this…

September is the season for kindergarten children to enter kindergarten again. For an old mother who battles wits and courage with her baby every day, this is really a great joy: Now that the baby has entered the kindergarten, we will solve it! put! Got it! Halfway through the ecstasy, the bright smiles of the old mothers have not yet fully relaxed, and they are choking on their laughter as if having a heart attack. They are worried about another thing: their children don\’t want to go to kindergarten, what should they do? ! Every year during the kindergarten admission season, there is a spectacular scenery outside the kindergarten wall. Some netizens joked like this: \”If you see this kind of situation outside the kindergarten, don\’t panic or call the police. They are not human traffickers, they are just children entering the kindergarten on their first day!\” The neighbor\’s little grandson gets up and puts on his clothes happily every day. Clothes, eating, going to the toilet, as long as the grandma picks up the school bag and says \”go to kindergarten\”, the little boy will be possessed by a drama, howling \”Wow\”… and then crying and rapping: \”I want to\” \”Look for mom, dad, grandparents, grandpa, aunts, uncles, aunties…\” The whole family shouted their names all the way from high to low, shouting all the way from home to the kindergarten, and the sadness and despair were evident. The neighbor\’s grandma was extremely worried: \”My child has been in kindergarten for a month and he cries every day. What should I do if my body is damaged by crying?\” Separation anxiety after entering kindergarten is like a fish bone, happily crossing the children\’s road to grow up. For example, there is thick phlegm that cannot be swallowed or spit out, which makes the parents choke. A survey shows that within three days of entering kindergarten, more than 60% of the children have separation anxiety. That is to say, two-thirds of the new children entering the kindergarten will have more or less anxiety. A teacher who has worked in a kindergarten for 20 years said: \”Anxiety about entering kindergarten is normal for children who are stepping out of the family for the first time. However, whether parents can give their children correct guidance at home will affect the degree of anxiety about entering kindergarten. The key is to cultivate various habits early. When children first enter kindergarten, they are unfamiliar with the new environment and new caregivers, and it is normal for them to shrink back and be afraid of strangers for a short period of time. If children can develop their self-care abilities and habits as early as possible and make their lifestyle, routine and rest consistent with those in kindergarten, then the \”highly similar\” life rhythm will give children a sense of security. My colleague’s daughter was raised by her grandma, who is a “relative from another generation” and is very pampered towards her little granddaughter. A three-year-old child needs to be fed when eating, peeing when going to the toilet, and even when drinking water, he only needs to point to the water cup, and grandma will happily bring the water over. Although my colleague’s daughter had been familiar with the kindergarten many times before entering the kindergarten, and even the teachers were neighbors in the same unit and were no strangers, the child still felt particularly uncomfortable after entering the kindergarten. The little girl cannot use a spoon, cannot squat to defecate, has not developed the habit of taking a nap at noon, and cannot express her needs correctly. Although the teacher was very careful and patient, she seemed out of place when she first entered collective life and had no ability to take care of herself. She huddled in the corner and became even more depressed. The girl Liu Siqi in \”Metamorphosis\” was fed by her second aunt at home. When she moved to a farmhouse in the mountains and had her first decent meal after surviving in the wilderness, the 16-year-old girl sincerely sighed: \”I miss home so much. I miss my second aunt to feed me.\” Liu Siqi, the eldest girl, encountered the problem of \”not being able to eat well\”.When children are in distress, they will reflexively think of the original caregivers at home, not to mention the children who have just entered kindergarten? Those children who adapt quickly are those who have strong self-care ability and whose living habits are highly consistent with those in kindergarten. When children\’s habits, routines and collective life are often out of sync, it is easier to get emotional. To relieve children\’s anxiety about entering kindergarten, it is important to familiarize themselves with the kindergarten environment in advance. More importantly, it is important to cultivate children\’s living habits that are consistent with the kindergarten. Is it easier for a second-born baby to enter kindergarten? When my eldest child entered kindergarten, even though I made thorough preparations, it was still very difficult for the child to enter the class in the first three days. When it was Erbao\’s turn to enter the kindergarten, the young man just frowned and said to me with a little sadness: \”Mom, you were the first to pick me up when the mothers didn\’t come!\” Could it really be the second child? Are you born smarter than the boss? Erbao is clearly familiar with the process of going to kindergarten. Not only is he less anxious, but he is also so knowledgeable in what he says – \”Be the first to pick me up!\” This is really thanks to Erbao following me to pick up and drop off my sister every day when he was a child. Out of true knowledge, he knew what \”going to kindergarten\” meant. Many children are full of ignorance and confusion about \”going to kindergarten\”. Some babies even figure it out after a week after entering kindergarten: \”It turns out that when I go to kindergarten, it\’s not that my parents don\’t want me, they will come to pick me up!\” The \”confusion\” between children and adults is the biggest source of parenting difficulties. . A foreign video asked 100 children to talk about \”what you don\’t understand about adults.\” Facing the camera, the innocent and lovely children said many things that are common to adults, such as: \”Why do adults drink coffee?\” \”Why do adults know how to cook?\” \”Why do adults always have boring conversations?\” … …Many children are \”opaque\”, not because adults lack understanding of children, but because children lack awareness of adults\’ behavior. Regarding the matter of \”going to kindergarten\”, it is difficult for babies around three years old to understand without experience. Parents can use some auxiliary means, such as: kindergarten-themed picture books, role-playing games, and picking up neighbor brothers and sisters to kindergarten, etc. This will allow the children to fully realize that going to kindergarten is just a short separation, and we will eventually return home together. When children have sufficient understanding and awareness of \”brief separation\”, \”going to kindergarten\” will soon become an interesting thing. Parental attitude is very important. I remember at this time last year, Sun Li once posted on Weibo: Deng Chao was going on a business trip, so he sent Wait and his sister to kindergarten. In addition to asking the children over and over again if they would miss him, sending them to the classroom was also a three-step process. Look back. Watching Deng Chao, a seven-foot-old man leaning against the wall of the classroom, reluctant to leave, it really makes people laugh. Anxiety about entering kindergarten is always two-sided. In addition to children\’s discomfort, parents often express concerns. When I used to work in a kindergarten, every year at this time, the kindergarten would stage a series of realistic versions of \”parting in the world\” dramas. In order to appease their children, all the parents tried their best to comfort their children: some held the door frame and refused to leave; some looked out from the corner of the window like spies from time to time; some parents cried with their children.Crying; some parents lie to their children, saying that they have been waiting outside the door… Jane Nelson, the author of \”Positive Discipline\” said: Children\’s perception ability is very strong, but their interpretation ability is very poor. Faced with parents\’ anxiety and reluctance, children will only become more depressed and anxious. My best friend\’s child is like this. He cried for three years in kindergarten. My best friend is a very anxious person. She is always worried that her child will not be able to adapt. The child\’s conditioned reflexes are average and he will cry after arriving in kindergarten. In the end, the child himself didn’t know why he was crying. Psychologists say: This is the child crying to cooperate with the mother\’s anxiety. The subtext is \”Okay, Mom, I can\’t live without you\” to satisfy the mother\’s inner needs. Going to kindergarten is a process for children to grow up. In fact, it is not only the children who need to grow up, but also their parents. When children are allowed to vent their emotions when they cry when they enter kindergarten, many parents will comfort them, tempt them with material material, or scold them loudly. Over and over again, the child still cries, and the parents are finally at their wits\’ end. When children get angry, parents become anxious. Every child\’s performance of kindergarten anxiety is different, but no matter the severity, intense or restrained, the child\’s emotional expression should be accepted. Psychologists believe that acceptance is the nourishment of one life to another. When a person is nourished, he will experience the flow of love, which is the ability to repair grief. My daughter’s kindergarten teacher often says to children who are in a bad mood when they enter kindergarten in the morning: “If you feel uncomfortable, just lie on me and cry for a while!” This kind of comfort often has a very magical effect. Children are allowed to express their feelings, which makes them more comfortable. It is easy to overcome bad emotions and return to the group. After children express their anxiety about entering kindergarten by crying, being alone, etc., they can also reduce the chance of getting sick. Allowing children to have a buffer and allow them to vent their emotions is the best acceptance for children. This kind of nourishment is better than any verbal comfort. When they first enter the kindergarten, the teachers are particularly attentive and hardworking. As parents, in addition to making adequate preparations at home, you should also try your best to cooperate with the teachers. The children can feel this friendliness from it, and the anxiety of entering kindergarten can be overcome more easily. some. Roy Clift said: \”I love you, not only because of what you look like, but also because of what I look like when I am with you.\” A child\’s first step into society is not a step in the growth of his parents. I grow up with you, and you grow old with me. That is not only the beauty in the painting, but also the path we are taking. The figure of the child waddling into the kindergarten like a penguin contains his strength, and even more, your success. Help your children get through the anxiety period of entering kindergarten, parents, let’s work together!