Don\’t children understand how to feel sorry for their parents? This is the truth that most parents ignore

To be honest, I really hate those artificial gratitude education. I don\’t like the imposed filial piety either. But I am full of awe of gratitude and strive to care for the elderly at home. Perhaps this is why I hope this beautiful character can be treated sincerely. I have a child, and I don’t expect him to be very filial to me in the future. I hope he\’s doing well, and I hope he cares about me. That kind of care is enough without sacrificing himself. I also hope that he can repay love and help to those who love him and help him. Therefore, in the process of raising small and large fish. Gratitude education is what I work hard to do carefully. Because I didn’t raise you for your gratitude. But I still have the responsibility to let you understand the meaning of gratitude. If you receive help from others, treat it as something you deserve, be ungrateful, and even ask for it endlessly. That\’s just going to be a person that everyone hates. I found that some children would rather burst their bellies and eat everything in one go than leave some for tomorrow. Once you see something you like, you will quickly satisfy yourself without caring about others. Some say it\’s nature. Indeed, this is greedy nature, which may not be good. And such children are often not grateful. Many parents think that \”when children are still young, they can be more relaxed and stricter when they grow up\”, or \”children will naturally become sensible when they grow up.\” In fact, this is not the case, because \”the big tree looks at the seedlings, and the big people look at the small ones.\” When children are young, the influence of parents is the most profound and direct. If you indulge and pamper your children since childhood, it will probably be too late when they grow up. And children without a grateful heart are really scarier than white-eyed wolves when they grow up. Gratitude is not something you are born with. It needs guidance, it needs role models, it needs parental wisdom. Rousseau pointedly pointed out in \”Emile\”: \”Do you know how to make your child suffer? That is, let him have whatever he wants. The more he gets, the more he wants, Sooner or later, you have to reject him. This unexpected rejection will hurt him far more than the harm he has never received.\” So you can\’t arrange your child\’s life, so don\’t let him feel anything. It’s all “off the shelf” and the result is ungrateful. Sometimes others don\’t know how to feel sorry for you, not because you give too little, but because you give too much. Many of our families regard their children as the center of the family. Then pamper them in every possible way and give them whatever they want. For example, if a bag of fruit is given to you by your parents, it will be returned to you after washing it, and then you can eat it yourself. The whole family revolves around one child, and the child plays the role of being loved all the time. Parents will do everything possible to satisfy them no matter what they want. Too strong love from parents not only makes children lose the opportunity to appreciate life. It is easier for children to become numb. Children take these things for granted. For example, some children even feel that the food will become cooked by themselves, and then they can just bring it to them. But they don’t know how hard their parents work. There is an advertisement in Thailand that I will always remember. The girl quarreled with her mother and ran away from home. Unexpectedly, the words of the roadside stall aunt made her burst into tears. She\’s been hanging out all day, my stomach growled with hunger, but I didn’t bring any money with me, but I couldn’t bear to go home for dinner. Until evening, she came to a noodle stall and smelled the fragrance. She really wanted to eat a bowl, but she had no money, so she could only swallow her saliva. Suddenly, the noodle stall owner asked kindly: \”Little girl, do you want some noodles?\” She replied sheepishly: \”Yes! But, I didn\’t bring any money.\” The boss laughed: \”Haha, it doesn\’t matter, today Call me a treat! The girl couldn\’t believe her ears. She sat down. After a while, the noodles came. She ate them with gusto and said: \”Boss, you are so kind!\” The boss said: \”Oh?\” How to say? The girl replied: \”We have never met, but you are so kind to me. Unlike my mother, you don\’t understand my needs and thoughts at all. It\’s really annoying!\” The boss laughed again: \”Haha, little girl, I just gave you a bowl of noodles, and you are so grateful to me. Then your mother has helped you cook for more than 20 years, shouldn\’t you be even more grateful to her?\” \”When the boss said this, the girl suddenly woke up from a dream, and tears burst out of her eyes! She didn\’t even bother to eat the remaining half bowl of noodles, and immediately ran home. That night, the girl deeply realized her mother\’s love for her. Love. We are always grateful for the person who bought us two meals, and we are harsh on the person who has taken care of us for more than 20 years. We love our children, but we must also teach our children to \”love\”. Our own needs You should also be satisfied. After being a parent for a long time, don’t forget that you are also a person with needs. Many mothers want to get rid of their temper in order to make their children feel comfortable. As a result, they almost suffer from mental illness. Why don’t you take a good look at it? Look inside yourself? You may be tired. You feel like you are trapped. You also need a hug and a word of comfort. In fact, you need to vent your stress. You can clearly tell your children how you feel, as long as you don’t express it casually. Just have a good temper. For example, I will tell Xiao Xiaoyu that daddy stays up late to work, so he needs to sleep in the afternoon, and you don’t disturb him, otherwise daddy will feel very uncomfortable and will get angry and lose his temper. Tell the child this way, if he goes into my room to get things, he will He is cautious. Because he knows that Dad needs to be quiet. Only when you face this problem can you solve these problems. You will not fall into self-denial and emotional depression. You will definitely not be tired, stressed, and lose your temper easily. Popular. Of course, when giving love to your children, please remember to give them the love they want. Many times, when we say we love our children, it is based on our own judgment and ignore the needs of the child. This judgment often comes from our own childhood. Some experiences. For example, some parents suffered from hunger when they were children, so they think that feeding their children is love. Some parents were very poor when they were young and did not have good clothes and shoes, so they think that buying beautiful and expensive clothes for their children , that is, loving children. Because I have felt the pain of childhood, I don’t want my children to repeat my pain. So I will try to make up for my children. In fact, this is also making up for my shortcomings in childhood. But such behavior is not necessarily It’s the kind of love that children need. At least, not the kind that children need. So when you’re angryComplaining incessantly: \”Why didn\’t I even kiss my mother when I bought you such nice clothes?\” \”Why didn\’t I feel that my child loved me even though I spent so much money on my child?\” \”Why couldn\’t my child feel it?\” Are you ungrateful for my love?\” In fact, the answer may be that the child does not feel it at all. The two of you have different past experiences, different ways of thinking, and even different needs. You are disappointed with your child\’s lack of gratitude, and your child is confused by your anger. So when you spend the whole day decorating the room and want to give your child a birthday surprise. As a result, the children turn a blind eye and destroy your masterpiece. Please do not get angry. Maybe you can have a pillow fight with him to make him feel your love even more. They want you to spend the whole day playing with them, not decorating the room. Just because we give all our love does not necessarily make our children feel bad for us. Because how much can they receive? It often depends on how much you understand their world. Also remember to reflect on how much you have satisfied your children, and is it just to satisfy yourself?