If a child who loves to talk back is educated in this way, he will definitely be successful when he grows up.

To be honest, when faced with a child who likes to talk back, have you ever wanted to beat the child for a moment? If you answer this question honestly, I think the answer for most parents would be yes. It’s just a thought for parents who can manage their emotions well. And parents who easily lose control of their emotions will really take violent action against their children. Some parents said that they were really angry and sad when they talked back. They were angry that the child was disobedient and constantly challenged their authority; they were sad that the little thing who had been so cute since he was a child and could not leave his side for a moment actually followed him. Against yourself. Faced with many \”resistances\” and \”talks back\” from children, parents should not rush into anger. They might as well think about it first: Why do children \”talk back\”? Children talking back is mostly related to their parents. 1. Use your own words to replace the child\’s thoughts. This is a mistake that many parents tend to make, which is to impose their own feelings on their children. \”I think you should be happy now, because I feel good.\” \”It\’s not fun.\” \”I think this dress looks good. The one you just wore is not as good as this one.\” \”But I like that one.\” \”You You always talk back to me like this, and I think you are just fooling around and looking for a beating.\” \”Ahhhhhh\”… Many similar situations are based on \”my\” feelings without taking into account the child\’s true feelings. idea. As a result, the child will act out, cry, make trouble, and talk back. We sometimes think that the child is unreasonable and troublesome. In fact, this \”reason\” is often the parent\’s own standard, not the child\’s. 2. What parents say to their children does not count. Some parents like to use coaxing to restrain their children. Agree to your child\’s requests, and if you follow your own ideas, you will be able to satisfy him. But often in actual practice, most of the coaxing turns into cheating, in order to let the children temporarily do their own thing. As for whether you will fulfill your promise afterwards, it is up to you. For example, the following scene: \”Dad, let\’s go downstairs to play.\” \”You do your homework first. I\’ll take you downstairs after you finish your homework.\” \”Okay, okay, let\’s pull the hook and I\’ll do my homework.\”… \”Dad, I\’m done. , let\’s go downstairs.\” \”Baby, it\’s too hot outside now. It would be nice to have the air conditioner at home.\” \”But you said it, dad, you are such a bad guy.\” 3. The child just wants to explain. I once asked many children a question: Under what circumstances would they talk back to their parents? The children\’s answers were surprisingly consistent: I only talk back when my parents misunderstand me. That time I was washing the dishes, and I was still thinking about the manuscript. Without paying attention, Youyou ran over from behind and wanted to pick up the freshly washed bowl and put it in the cupboard, but her little hands couldn\’t pick up two plates at the same time. After a few attempts, the plate fell to the ground and broke. One and the other also have a small gap. At that time, I got angry at my child, \”Who asked you to take the plate? Didn\’t you see that mom was busy?\” I regretted saying it, and I saw Youyou humming with tears in her eyes, \”I just want to help mom.\” . I was really annoyed with myself at that moment. 4. What you ask your children to do is something you cannot do yourself. Children are the mirror of their parents. If you want your children to act according to their own ideas, you must firstSet a good example. Take watching TV as an example. We are worried that children will delay their rest and study because of watching TV. But the adults did not include themselves. Either holding a mobile phone or tablet, or holding on to the remote control, watching TV series. However, children are required to do their homework on time and go to bed on time. This is simply a dream. The child will not only imitate you and lie on the sofa, but also respond to your discipline with the reason of \”you are watching too, why can\’t I play?\” It is not a bad thing for children to talk back. Children talk back, which troubles countless parents, but what other information is behind \”talking back\”? In my opinion, it is not a bad thing for children to talk back. On the contrary, what I fear most is that in order to please their parents, children ignore their true feelings or even give up on themselves. If a child talks back, it means that he has his own ideas. In the argument with his parents, he knows what to do to achieve his own goals; he can point out what his parents failed to do and instead asked for themselves. In talking back, children can always learn more or less debating skills, except of course for unreasonable nonsense. For example, the little girl downstairs in our house wants to learn martial arts, but her mother insists on letting her learn dancing. The little girl retorted: \”There is a little girl in our class, Xiao Hong, who learned martial arts and is now very good.\” \”What\’s so good about her?\” \”No boys in our class dare to bully her!\” The little girl understands her own interests. , is thoughtful and opinionated, and has found arguments that can prove her arguments, and knows the skills of debating, which will be beneficial when she enters the workplace, goes to the negotiation table, or in some social processes in the future. Teacher Tian Xian, a must-read lecture for parents, once mentioned in a class on the influence of native families on children that “talking back can greatly stimulate the development of children’s language skills. The logical skills that children gradually master through arguing are also good for the development of children’s logical thinking. A big help.\” When children talk back, try to do this. When parents look at their children talking back with a tolerant and understanding attitude, there will be more reasonable humanity and mutual fun in the family. joy. Parents can try this. 1. Encourage the child to finish the sentence. There are many reasons for children to talk back. Our harsh suppression and yelling are actually equivalent to blocking an outlet for children to vent their emotions. On the surface, children may show obedience to their parents because they are in a disadvantaged situation, but in their hearts, they may always be unconvinced and begin to alienate their parents little by little. Parents might as well give their children more patience, listen to his thoughts, and encourage him to finish speaking. Let him feel the attention and respect from his parents, and it will be easier for him to reach a consensus with his parents. 2. Set an example and speak well as a family. When I was watching TV with my children at night, I suddenly drove them away: \”It\’s already 9 o\’clock, go to bed!\” But the children didn\’t understand why their parents could watch TV until late, but they couldn\’t? Since parents are good role models for their children, they should set an example. If they want their children to sleep well, they should also turn off the TV and mobile phones; if they want their children to not be picky about food, they should not be picky; if they want their children not to say bad words , we should also be civilized. 3. Use a consultative tone. when a childParents should feel relieved when they resist their demands for room sharing. This is exactly how children prove their growth. We cannot raise a child who will never grow up. When a child has his own opinions, it reminds the mother that he should be treated in a different way. Parents should not take over everything for their children, but should adopt a consultation approach to understand their children\’s thoughts. For non-principled issues, you can discuss them with your children, but for principled issues, parents need to have a firm attitude. Let your children know that there will be consequences for messing around and that there is no use in talking back. We do not encourage children to talk back rudely, but our purpose has never been to attack children and let them spend their childhood in embarrassment, but to stand firmly with them and help them grow more steadily.