Parents must ask their children 3 sentences after school, especially the first sentence

Many people will ask me this question: \”What should I pay attention to most in the parent-child relationship?\” Is it understanding? Is it patience? Or companionship? In fact, whenever this happens, I will answer with two words: \”Communicate.\” Communication is a bridge. Only when the bridge is built can there be a stable parent-child relationship. Last weekend, when the weather was nice, I took my children to go to the small park downstairs. I happened to see this scene: a little boy who may not have been out to play for a long time was very excited, grabbing his mother\’s hand and asking questions. But the mother was chatting with the aunt next to her. She responded to the child\’s questions in a perfunctory manner. When the child got tired of asking questions, she even asked the little boy to go aside and play and stop messing around. \”Mom, why are you ignoring me!\” \”Didn\’t you see mom talking to others? Play by yourself for a while!\” \”No! You talk to me!\” \”I\’m already here with you, you still want to What are you doing!\” Seeing such a scene, I felt very sorry that such good family time was wasted by this mother. What this mother did is not an exception, it is even common. Download the full collection of a real Yu Shiwei lecture: Preschool children’s family education story case selection, all 156 issues. Ignore your children’s words now, and wait until later, when you speak for yourself and the children ignore them, parents may blame their children. Why do children love their words? I ignored him. Every individual needs communication. Don\’t let the \”high wall\” in your child\’s heart gradually build up. At that time, you won\’t be able to get in even if you want to. Many parents understand the importance of communication, but many times, a word or a question we throw to our children is like a small stone thrown into the sea, unable to stir up a splash. In fact, children sometimes become more and more impatient and don\’t want to talk to us. In fact, the best time to communicate with your children is the ten minutes after school. But what is the first thing you say when your child comes out of school? Most parents may ask these questions: \”Have you had enough for lunch today?\” \”How was your day at school/kindergarten today?\” \”Did the teacher assign homework today?\” \”Did the teacher criticize you? ?” Some parents may ask these questions in succession, making their children more and more irritable and unwilling to communicate. This vicious cycle of \”useless communication\” also lays landmines for future conflicts between parents and children. As parents, what questions should we ask so that our children can talk to us and feel our care? The following three sentences are a good example: \”Did anything interesting happen in class today?\” Childhood should be the most carefree time in a child\’s life. However, many parents often ask their children on the way to pick up their children from school, \”Did the teacher criticize you today?\” \”Did you get scolded today?\” Although this is also a concern of parents, it invisibly adds to the pressure. A study on Chinese college students that included 39 studies from 1997 to 2015 and included 32,694 people showed that the incidence of depression among Chinese students was 23.8%. The World Health Organization has also stated that 1/4 of Chinese college students admit to experiencing depressive symptoms.. Therefore, when the child has just left school and is relatively relaxed, we can first ask him what interesting and happy things happened today, so that the child can recall and easily describe what he saw and heard at school that day. At the same time, this sentence is also a positive guide that can help children recall fun things at school, thereby creating enthusiasm for going to school the next day. If parents ask their children whether they have been criticized, it is a reverse guide, and the children will have negative thoughts about school life. \”What did you learn today? Can you teach me when you go home?\” Many parents have asked about the first half of this sentence, but almost no parents can say the second half. In fact, letting children teach \”us\” knowledge is far more important than simply asking him what he has learned. Everyone must be familiar with the top student \”Lei\’er\” in \”Little Joy\”. In one episode, Wang Yidi\’s mother hoped that Lei\’er could give Wang Yidi tutoring lessons, but Lei\’er\’s aunt Tong Wenjie disagreed because Wang Yidi\’s mother had a strong sense of superiority, and Wang Yidi was not a lovable person. child. But our top student Lei\’er said this: It can be seen that teaching others is actually a process of rearranging ideas and truly digesting knowledge. In addition, letting children \”teach\” us topics, and more importantly, allows children to receive full respect and encouragement, and improves children\’s self-confidence. If things go on like this, he will continue to work hard towards a certain learning goal in order to gain the recognition and appreciation of his parents. \”Do you need help from your dad/mom?\” This sentence actually has two meanings: First: Mom and dad are your most loyal supporters. If you have any difficulties or need help, you can tell us. Let your child know that his parents are always caring about him. The second level: guide children to think independently about how to deal with problems and how to solve difficulties. This is what we really want to teach our children. It is far more meaningful to let a child grow up in difficulties and setbacks than to let him live in a safe haven. Therefore, when a child raises a difficulty, we can first guide the child to think for himself and let him know that his parents cannot always be with him when he goes to school, and he must first find a solution when encountering difficulties. This is how Wu Zun\’s daughter Neinei gradually grew up. Due to program recording requirements, Neinei needed to be separated from Wu Zun briefly in \”Where Are We Going, Dad\”. Neinei, who couldn\’t accept it for a while, told her father that she didn\’t want to participate in the show at the end of the first recording, but Wu Zun discussed with her and try again. Take a look once. As a result, during the second and third trips, Neinei became more and more independent and took care of other younger siblings. Gradually, she became the little leader among the children. Children are actually not as fragile as we think. As parents, what we need to do is learn to let go. However, if a child is really bullied at school and cannot solve it on his own, we must also stand up to protect the child. Different questions reflect parents’ different educational philosophies and methods. Is Sun Luhong’s course worth buying? In addition to the children\’s academic performance, we should be more concerned about their emotions and feelings. Educating children requires us to use a childlike innocence, discover the beauty of life with children; use adult wisdom and experience to enrich children\’s feathers and teach them to face all aspects of life. Let us use love and patience to care for our children and grow up slowly.