How to make children confident lies in this habit

In life, we often look in the mirror. By looking in the mirror, we can see our appearance and know whether our face is clean and whether we are well-dressed. If something goes wrong, we\’ll be able to make adjustments in time. When people face their own appearance, they need to look in the mirror. When facing their own inner self and their own cognition, behavior, and emotional state, they also need to have a process of \”looking in the mirror,\” and this process is the process of reflection. After reflection, we may be very satisfied with ourselves, so that we will be in a better mood and have more confidence in ourselves; or we may see many of our shortcomings, so that we can adjust in time and become a better version of ourselves. Understanding yourself will make you more confident about things, such as children\’s exams, daily study, as well as our daily work and getting along with others. It does not end when things are done. We must often reflect on ourselves. Reflect on what? It means reflecting on the whole story, thinking about what you did, how you felt, why you could do it well, or why you didn\’t do it well, and how to deal with it better next time you encounter such a thing. The habit of reflection is very important. One of the most important purposes of review and reflection is to better understand yourself. The process of children growing up is also a process of constantly understanding themselves. If a person is not clear about his own characteristics, ability level, and shortcomings, he will feel confused and unconfident. Why do many young and middle-aged people feel confused now? It’s because you don’t know yourself well enough. Logically speaking, the person who knows us best should be ourselves. Because in the process of experiencing things and people, your own feelings are the most direct and cannot be replaced by anyone. This is how American mothers teach self-confidence pdf download. If our self-confidence comes from feedback from the outside world, such self-confidence is extremely unstable. Because whether we are working or studying, our performance will fluctuate and rise, so the outside world\’s evaluation of us is also unstable. Only when we truly understand our own core will we feel more confident and will not be easily manipulated by others. We will not belittle ourselves because of someone else\’s criticism, and we will not overestimate ourselves because of someone else\’s praise. The most important thing is to review and reflect on our own feelings, which should become our daily habit. So how do we do the daily review? In fact, it is very simple. The entire process of review revolves around four types of issues. In any situation, we can use these four types of questions to self-reflect and guide children to reflect: \”What is it? Why? How do you feel? What should I do?\” These four universal questions are our \”Four Golden Questions\” . The Four Golden Questions are divided into two categories. One is based on rational thinking and is related to the path to solving problems; the other is based on perceptual thinking to better understand one\’s own feelings and emotional state. When reviewing, many parents will ignore their children\’s feelings and just mechanically ask their children, \”What did you do today? What didn\’t you do well? How can you change it next time?\” But in the process of doing something, feelings are actually very important. of. Whether a person can continue to do something, the most important thing is not how much he can gainnot the benefits, but how you feel when doing it. If we feel happy, happy and refreshed, we will be willing to do it. If we feel fear, fear, anxiety, boredom, or unhappiness about this matter, all of which are negative emotions, we definitely don’t want to do it. Even if you have to do it, you will feel pain during the process, and it is impossible to persist in doing it for a long time. then what should we do? First, we need to find ways to make the process of doing this thing less painful and as happy as possible; second, we need to let the children feel through reflection that the feeling caused by this thing is not just pain, but I am getting happier and happier. Don’t ignore rational thinking. When a person makes decisions and takes actions, 80% of them may be driven by emotions rather than rationality. However, we cannot ignore the importance of rational thinking. If we completely let our emotions drive us, we may feel happy in the short term after making our choice, but over time we may regret it. But when emotions come, it is impossible for us to suppress them through reason, and even no force can suppress the outburst of emotions. So what should we do? We need to let this emotional state flow for a while first. In the process of emotions flowing, the needs behind our emotions are satisfied bit by bit, the emotions are slowly vented, and the rational brain can regain the high ground. This is also a kind of acceptance of our emotions. In the process of guiding children to reflect, we must first guide their emotions. When the child\’s emotions are vented and his rational brain comes online, ask him again, \”What is it? Why? What should I do?\” Under the guidance of parents time and time again, children gradually become more and more harmonious with their emotions. His behavior is also constantly adjusting. Whether it is life matters or studying and writing homework, he will do better and better. If we want to understand our appearance, we need a mirror; if we want to understand our inner self, behavior, and emotional state, we need another \”mirror\”, which is self-reflection. When we have objective and stable self-understanding, our self-confidence comes from the inside out, and we will not overestimate or underestimate ourselves just because of what others say. This kind of self-confidence is true self-confidence.