How to judge whether a child is smart or not? Where to look?

Do you believe? Chatting with children often will make them smarter, which is even more effective than asking children to read more and do more mental training. Chatting is a comprehensive training for children, which can stimulate the development of hearing, visual senses and language skills, so that children\’s intelligence can be effectively developed. An organization in the United States once conducted a survey of parents across the country and asked them: In today\’s society, which skill do you think can make children stand out from the competition? Most parents think it’s communication skills. Children who often chat with their parents not only have greatly improved communication skills and emotional intelligence, but also have good social skills, making it easier for them to have a bright future. Parents who are good at communication have a more harmonious relationship with their children. American anthropologists Betty Hart and Todd Risley once conducted a famous \”30 million word\” gap survey. This survey took 2 and a half years and followed 42 families, including 13 families with high economic status and 6 families from poor families. They recorded conversations between different parents and children, and finally came to the conclusion Yes: Children from poor families, by the age of 4, have heard 30 million fewer English words than children from wealthy families. How do parents communicate with their children? The most acceptable education method for children.mobi In addition, according to the investigation team, the quantity of language between parents and children also determines the quality of language. The more parents talk, the richer their children\’s vocabulary will be, and children with rich vocabulary will perform better. Casual conversations between parents and children may seem trivial, but they affect their language skills, academic performance, and future development. Some parents may have questions, why do some parents \”talk at length\” to their children every day, but why do their children still have so little to say? According to the latest research from MIT, what affects children\’s brain development is not the difference in vocabulary, but the number of interactions between children and parents. It is the decisive factor affecting children\’s brain development. The research team took more than 30 children aged 4-6 as the research subjects. By scanning their brain activity while listening to stories, and examining the interaction between parents and children, the following comprehensive results were obtained: The frequency of communication between parents and children The higher they are, the stronger the language activity area in their brains, which is not directly related to the family\’s economic status. In other words, even if the child\’s family is relatively wealthy, if the parents communicate little with the child, the child\’s language development and brain response ability will be poor; and for children from poor families, if the parents communicate more with the child, Their language skills will also be greatly enhanced. What\’s more amazing is that through chatting, the gap between parents and children is reduced, the relationship between parents and children is more harmonious, and the children\’s social skills are significantly improved. Incorrect communication methods will harm children. American education experts once pointed out that the correct communication method with children should be: listen to and respect children\’s feelings, allow children to make independent choices, but give fair and clear explanations for wrong behaviors. limit. This means that when chatting with children, you should pay attention to the following chat methods. Otherwise, it is very easy to cause children to have rebellious psychology and damage their self-esteem. 01Talk too much to your child. For example, when your child is doing homework, if you tell your child, \”Today\’s task is to write 2 homeworks, do 10 math problems, and practice piano 3 times. If you delay, it will affect you.\” Time to practice piano or read books, oh, by the way, there are other things to pay attention to…\” When you talk to your child continuously for more than 30 seconds, you will find that the child has long been impatient, because to him, you The amount of information in the words is too large and illogical. The brain has no time to process it, and a lot of information is ignored. So don\’t blame your children for being disobedient, because they can\’t remember what you said. 02 Constant nagging and warnings. Every morning, I would prepare breakfast for my children and help them pack their schoolbags and school supplies. However, my children not only lingered, but even stayed in bed. So I began to nag and warn: \”Not yet.\” Get up, do you know what time it is? You\’re going to be late for school, get dressed quickly!\” Maybe less than 5 minutes later, when I saw that the child still hadn\’t moved, I couldn\’t help but say, \”I\’ve told you so much, why don\’t you get dressed? Not moving! Do you want to be late? Have you sorted out your homework? Do you want to sign it?\”… This cycle repeats. Many times, parents have good intentions, but they simply do not believe that their children can do things well. Excessive language will not only suppress their children\’s self-confidence, but even make them resentful. 03 Not listening to what the child said Once, my child won a prize in a speech contest in the class. After returning home, he excitedly told me that he wanted to share his happiness with me, but I was cooking at the time and had no time to take care of it. I just said casually. : Not bad, go watch TV and then continue to do your own thing. He didn\’t even make eye contact with the child, and he was obviously perfunctory. There are many parents like this. Some parents will even say impatiently: \”Don\’t you see I\’m busy? Don\’t bother me!\” But what are you busy with, scrolling on your phone or playing games? What\’s more important than children? Have you seen the look in the child\’s eyes that turned from excitement to disappointment? Chatting with high emotional intelligence makes children smarter. If you want your children to become smarter and win at the starting line, you must not only let your children learn more knowledge, but also keep communicating with them. Communication is not difficult, but communication with high emotional intelligence requires attention to the following points, which requires us to understand them carefully. First of all, guide children to communicate more. When we chat with children, we don’t need to deliberately stick to a fixed location or place. We can do it anytime and anywhere. For example, when your children are getting dressed in the morning, you can talk to them about the appropriate clothes to wear, including the style, color, style, fashion, and how to match them, etc. You can use a question-and-answer method to allow your children to participate. , and it allows him to learn a lot of knowledge. Some parents may say that their children are too young to understand. But everyone knows that it is because the child is young that we need to guide him in the little things in life so that he can learn how to live happily. Secondly, do more scene-based communication to chat with your children. In addition to not only regardless of place, but also regardless of scene, it can be used in any scene. For example, after dinner, when walking with your child in a park, square or street, you can talk to your child about some of the surrounding buildings or interesting people or things. My friend Lin has done a great job in this regard. every timeWhen she took her child for a walk, everything they encountered on the road became a topic of conversation for them after dinner. The child began to ask some \”weird\” questions: \”Mom, why does this street look slanted?\” ?\” \”Mom, why are there such strange fruits on the tree?\” Lin patiently explained to the child, and at the same time, she also deliberately guided the child to think. They walked and chatted, and the child was very happy. Furthermore, consider communicating with children from their perspective. The most taboo thing is to always communicate with your children based on your own ideas, without considering why the children think that way. For example, not long ago, when I was reading \”Puppy Money\” with my child, he always asked me, why is it that Monica\’s family is so rich, but Gia\’s family can\’t even afford a house? Some parents may think it is childish, but in fact, if you think about it from the child\’s perspective, you will understand why the child would ask this. There is a term in psychology called \”empathy\”, which means to learn to put yourself in someone else\’s shoes and understand the other person\’s emotions. When you understand your child\’s intentions, patiently answer and explain them in a way that the child can understand. Parents are their children\’s first teachers, and every word and gesture you make subtly affects their children\’s understanding of society and life. Maybe your family is not very wealthy and your child\’s IQ is not very high, but the rich language exchange between you and your child is like a beacon, illuminating the child\’s way forward and allowing him to move forward on the right path. OK. When you are still envious of those children who are eloquent and whose families are wealthy; you are jealous of those children who attend various interest classes and have super memories; please don’t forget that chatting with your children is the simplest way to shape their strongest brains, and it is also Education that any family can afford. Some people say that the best time to plant a tree was ten years ago, followed by now. Therefore, no matter how old your child is now, please take every communication you have with your child seriously from now on. This is the best emotional connection between you and your child, and it is also the real starting line for your child. Improve your language expression skills. What do you want to play tomorrow? How to play exactly? Can you teach my mother? What did you find most interesting today? Tell your mother about it? Who was in the cartoon you watched today? What did they do? Exercise logical thinking skills Today we went out to play, what did we play first? What are you playing again? What did you play after you got home? Why do we need to bring umbrellas when we go out today? We have to clean up at home tomorrow. What should mom and dad do with you? What do you think are the benefits of playing games? What\’s the harm? If you were our parents for a day, how would you arrange our lives? Improve spatial orientation perception: Let’s go to the supermarket later. How should we go after going out? Where does the sun rise and set every day? Download the Duo Huhui New Mind Development Series of Young Children\’s Talent Development [3-year-old series, 8 volumes in total, ultra-clear, full-color PDF version] Our family lives on the 8th floor, and my grandma lives on the 6th floor. When we are at home, where is grandma? Where was grandma with us when we were playing in the garden? Where is your good friend Xinxin\’s home from ours? Where is your favorite slide in the neighborhood? Enhance observation and memory by closing your eyesEyes, recall what color clothes your mother is wearing today? Are you wearing pants or a skirt? When you went to kindergarten today, who was the first child you met? What did the teacher say to you today? How many types of household chores can you name? What was your favorite dish you had today? Exercise your number sense memory. Let’s count how many floors the house we live in has? How many rooms are there in the house? How many buttons are there in total on Mom\’s shirt? How many bears are there on the baby\’s clothes? How many pieces of clothing are in the storage basket? There are 5 bananas in the fruit plate. Mom ate one and dad ate two. How many bananas are left? Enhance safety awareness After kindergarten, a strange uncle tells you that he is your mother\’s friend and that your mother asked him to pick you up. Will you go with him? While walking on the road, your mother and you encounter bad people, and your mother stops them. What should you do? The uncle in the community said he would take you home and give you fun toys. Will you go? If one day, my mother is captured by a monster, will you come to save me? If you were home alone and a stranger knocked on your door, would you open the door? Improve self-awareness What do you think you are best at? What are you least good at? What do you like and dislike about your mother? Where is dad? What do you most want to do when you grow up? Why? What do children say about you? Do you agree? Who is the most powerful in your opinion? Who is your idol? There are also many divergent questions [Guide your imagination] If you turned into an animal, what would you most like to become? [Focus on privacy issues] We all share a little secret, how about exchanging it? [Improve caring ability] If your mother is unhappy, how will you comfort her? [Exercise the ability to resist frustration] You worked very hard to play football but lost an important game. How do you feel? [Enhance Social Maturity] When do you feel that others are lying to you?