How to develop a self-disciplined person in your child

Every parent hopes that their children can take the initiative in doing things, study more seriously, take care of their own affairs, and let their parents worry less. But the children always find various reasons to procrastinate, dawdle, and do things perfunctorily. They always procrastinate in doing things and are not self-disciplined enough. Their parents worry very hard, but it is ineffective. Parents are worried, but their children still can\’t get up on time, refuse to eat well, can\’t take the initiative to do homework, and have no plans for study and life… 01 Are your children obedient? Huan Huan became obsessed with assembly toys after he entered elementary school. The Gundam Warrior had more than a thousand small parts that dazzled me, but in the child\’s eyes, they were just magical snowflakes, and he was completely attracted to them. From the moment he opened the box, whether you yelled at him or scolded him, he turned a deaf ear and sat on the desk with his head buried for a long time. The homework has not been finished and the meal has not come. This child is really disobedient – this is what I thought at the beginning. The so-called disobedience actually means \”did the child complete/do things well according to my requirements?\” But this is not a truly self-disciplined child. A truly self-disciplined child does not \”do whatever my parents want me to do,\” but will take the initiative to do these things under the guidance of self-awareness. It first requires the child\’s brain to say \”I want to do it, I want to do it\” by itself, and then convert the thoughts into real actions. 02 Self-discipline must first have \”self\”, and then \”discipline\”. What is self-discipline? Self-discipline refers to demanding oneself by oneself, changing from passive to active, and consciously restraining one\’s words and deeds without anyone\’s on-site supervision. A self-disciplined person does not need supervision and reminders from others and can focus on doing things and improving himself. The children upstairs in my house get up at 7 o\’clock every morning, have breakfast at 7:30 and go to school. They come home from school in the afternoon and do homework first, practice piano at 8 o\’clock in the evening, and watch TV for a while before going to bed at 9 o\’clock. Every time the child\’s mother talks to us, she has a complacent expression. She feels that her child is very self-disciplined, doesn\’t need to worry, and is very good. Hey, he is really someone else\’s child. He is very well-behaved and obedient. He also seems to be very self-disciplined. He follows this template every day. In fact, this is completely the parents setting a program for their children according to their own will. The children have not asked themselves whether they agree with their parents and whether they enjoy these arrangements. Some children do not play or make trouble and study and do their homework when their parents are present; but when their parents are not present, they immediately drop their homework and play hard. This is obviously a kind of heterodiscipline, not self-discipline. These are not the true self-discipline of children. The final result is that the child\’s subjective initiative is restricted, and the child will become more and more passive, preventing the child\’s self-discipline from being developed. Once out of the parent\’s vision or control, the child will become at a loss. 03 The Ultimate State of Children’s Self-Discipline What qualities does a child who truly knows how to manage himself need to possess? 1. Children have self-awareness of the current situation, that is, they know their own affairs well. Parents should let their children pay attention to their current feelings, let them understand their current situation more and more clearly, and gradually help them form an understanding of themselves and guide their children to pay attention to their own status. Mothers can ask their children like this:How to help children develop self-discipline – self-driven growth – free reading mobi+epub+azw3 \”Do you want to relax first, or do you want to finish your homework first?\” Let your children know how much homework they have written and how much they have left to finish. \”Are you frowning all the time because the homework is difficult?\” Let the children know what they have learned and what they have not learned. \”You have regressed in this exam. Do you feel frustrated?\” Let the children know that the exam is to test the degree of learning and mastery, and to know their own shortcomings. ·······In this way, children can evaluate their homework and their own learning status, and formulate study plans based on this. 2. Allowing children to have a clear self-understanding of their own pursuit of future achievements is the basis for children to develop self-discipline; and the pursuit of achievements is the key to children\’s development of self-discipline. Only when a child thinks about it on his own and accomplishes something can he feel strong self-satisfaction. He believes in himself that \”I can do it.\” Huan Huan worked on Gundam Fighter, dismantled it, dismantled it and put it together again. When a finished product is displayed in front of his eyes, his satisfied and confident eyes will really shine. When it comes to assembling toys, the child completes it consciously and disciplinedly. When he completes the learning task seriously, the child will also feel that the knowledge he has learned through his own efforts is enough to give him the joy of success. Based on this joy, what parents should do next is: leave the scene gracefully, return subjectivity to their children, and let them experience self-achievement. When a child has a clear understanding of the current situation and a persistent pursuit of future achievements, he will form an internal driving force that urges him to continue to explore, break through, and become a better person. Own. In order for children to achieve true self-discipline, they must consciously restrain their words and deeds through the drive of their own will in a calm and stress-free environment, and enter a state of concentration on learning or doing things. Therefore, parents should not put pressure or overly intervene to force their children to grow; nor should they require their children to be comprehensive and omnipotent; and should not use the advantages of other people\’s children to demand their own children. Give your children enough time and space to grow and make progress little by little, and become a better version of themselves step by step.