Most of the children who have always been with their mothers come from the third type of families.

As parents, we all hope that our children will always be close to us. We hope that whether their children are young or grow up, their relationship with their parents will not become alienated, and they will not have nothing to say to their parents. Especially for mothers, from the tenth month of pregnancy to the birth of the baby, the child has always been the most attached to the mother, the most dependent on the mother, and the closest to the mother. Everything is shared with the mother, and the mother is also very happy and satisfied. Mothers have all experienced taking care of their babies day and night. Some mothers have quit their jobs for the sake of their babies. Mothers are getting older day by day because of taking care of their children and worrying about them. However, in order to My child, my mother feels that whatever she does is worthwhile. When one day, the mother discovers that her child has become less and less close to her as she grows up, and the relationship between her child and herself is getting further and further away, she must be very sad. The root cause of children not being close to their mothers when they grow up is actually directly related to the family environment in which the children grew up. I have read a parenting book about \”How do parents speak so that their children will listen?\” The author of this book, Adele Farber, has done a lot of tests on this and organized many parents to communicate. Through communication and research on multiple groups of families, he found that the closeness between children and their parents does not lie in age, but in parent-child communication methods and family relationships. Those children who are still close to their parents when they grow up have always been \”always with their mothers\”. Most of the children who are parents come from these three types of families. Category 1: Respect children, be democratic, and have a good family atmosphere. A relatively relaxed and democratic family atmosphere will make children feel free and relaxed at all times, make them feel respected, and also feel the harmonious and warm atmosphere of the family. Children who grow up in such a family atmosphere can easily develop their enthusiasm, initiative and creativity. Children are also better able to fully understand their self-worth and have strong independence, problem-solving abilities and ability to adapt to society. Children who have been respected by their parents since childhood also have more self-esteem and self-confidence, and they have a more grateful heart. As the person who spends the most time with the children in the family, the mother is the one who worries about the child in most families, whether it is tutoring the child with homework or the child\’s daily food and clothing expenses. In this process, if the mother does not respect the child, it will be very serious. It is easy to have a tense relationship with your children, especially after the children reach adolescence, the relationship will become even more tense. My friend Lulu is a person with a strong personality, and she has the final say at home, so she has the final say at home since she was a child, and both her husband and son have to listen to her. For this reason, since the son turned 10 years old, he has started to fight against his mother and parent-child relationships. The relationship is very tense. Lulu\’s son is in the second year of high school. She has been accompanying her son since he entered junior high school to attend school. Now that her son is in the second year of high school, she still rents a house near her son\’s high school to accompany her. She devotes all her attention to her son and requires him to listen. her. Whatever the son wants to do must be approved by his mother. Even though he is already in high school, his mother still does not give him the right to make his own choices. For this reason, the son has a lot of complaints against his mother, and the family atmosphere has always been tense. During a chat, Lulu said that she accidentally saw her son’s diary.She just wants to stay away from this family, as far away as possible, and want to live a free life. This makes Lulu, a mother, very sad. She doesn\’t understand why her son is becoming less and less close to her when she is so good to her. ? In fact, those children who have always \”followed their mother\” have been fully respected by their parents since childhood. They have a certain degree of autonomy, and the family atmosphere is relaxed and active, and the parent-child relationship is very harmonious. This leaves many wonderful things for the children. Childhood memories, even when the children grow up, they still \”keep up with their mother\”. Category 2: Families that do not control their children for their own good. Many parents use the name of \”for your own good\” to make detailed arrangements for their children. Such as: what shoes to wear, what clothes to wear, what kind of children should be friends with, not this, not that, control the children very strictly. As everyone knows, parents\’ \”for your own good\” arrangements are like shackles, suffocating children. When they are young, they are unable to resist, but when they grow up and can stay away from the family independently, they will I want to escape from my parents and live freely. I accidentally saw a post from a netizen saying that she had grown up in the name of her parents \”doing good for you\”. Since she was a child, her parents have not allowed her to eat snacks, drink drinks, or be friends with children with poor grades. . Even in junior high school, her mother wanted to know everything about her. She even peeked at her diary, lest she fall in love early. If she got close to a male classmate, her mother would interrogate her. She said that she lived under surveillance every day without any freedom. When she wanted to resist, her mother always said hysterically: \”Isn\’t this all for your own good? Why are you so ungrateful?\” She had no choice but to give up her resistance. It wasn\’t until she entered college that her mother couldn\’t control everything about her. However, the girl said that after entering college, she finally breathed a sigh of relief. Even during the holidays, she did not want to go home. Thinking of her mother\’s previous control over her, she was still frightened. She wanted to escape. The university she chose at that time was in another province. , only went home once more than a year, and she just couldn\’t get close to her mother. Therefore, if you want your children to still be \”close to their mother\” when they grow up, then during their growth, the mother should care for her children with love and give them trust and freedom. Don\’t always do it in the name of \”for your own good\”. Controlling your children is counterproductive. Category 3: Families whose parents are emotionally stable and do not get angry easily with their children. Parents are under great pressure and will always be in a bad mood. If the children are not obedient at this time, the parents will transfer this bad mood to the children. , and loses temper with the child, which will seriously affect the child\’s physical and mental health. It is said that parents are children\’s first teachers. Parents\’ words and deeds directly affect their children\’s growth, and parents\’ emotions will also affect their children\’s emotions. If parents are very positive and optimistic every day and are in a good mood, this emotion will infect their children. When a child faces happy parents every day, then the child\’s heart will be happy. At this time, no matter what he does, he will be successful. If you treat it with optimism, you will definitely become an optimistic, positive and sunny child in the future. on the contrary,If parents are always emotionally unstable, get angry at every turn, yell at their children at every turn, and some parents even attack their children, children who grow up in such a family environment will become more emotional and have a certain rejection of their parents. , when they grow up, their relationship with their parents is often estranged, and they are not close to their mother. Advice for mothers: Mothers have a great influence on their children. Mothers are irreplaceable in their children’s lives. The company and love they give their children since childhood, the way they get along with their children, and the atmosphere of the family will all become indispensable in their children’s childhood. Obliterated memories. As parents, we all hope that our children can grow up healthily and happily. If we want to realize this wish, we must start from ourselves and the family environment in which our children live. We must give our children full democracy and adequate education. Trust and be an emotionally stable parent. Because most of the children who have been \”close to mom\” since childhood come from such families. If you also want your children to still \”close to mom\” when they grow up, try your best to do the above three points so that The parent-child relationship is more harmonious. Does your child always kiss his mother?