What will happen to the children of parents who truly love their children?

Every parent loves their children deeply, but in different ways. Some parents love their children too much, causing their children to become naughty old people and giant babies; some parents mistakenly regard \”control and possession\” as love, leaving pain in their children\’s hearts. Therefore, in family education, parents must learn to truly love their children. Psychologist Rogers said: \”Love is deep understanding and acceptance.\” So, how do we truly love our children? 01 To truly love your children, you must give them unconditional love. In life, many mothers will say something like this: In this exam, you ranked first in the class. You are really a good boy of your mother; if you are disobedient, I don’t like it. How would your child feel if they heard this? He will feel that what my mother loves is my academic performance and my performance, not myself. If my grades are not good and I am disobedient, my mother will not love me. This kind of love is conditional love. This kind of love is not real love. The true love that parents give to their children should be unconditional. Unconditional love has nothing to do with the child\’s performance, the child\’s academic performance, or whether the child is obedient… What parents love is the child himself. When a child makes a mistake, wise parents will not criticize the child harshly, but just tell the child what is wrong and let the child take the corresponding responsibility. When a child\’s academic performance is not satisfactory, wise parents consider not their own feelings, but the feelings of their children. They will comfort their children in a timely manner, analyze the reasons for unsatisfactory performance with their children, and discuss ways to improve their performance. When a child is introverted and moves slowly, parents will respect the child\’s personality and allow the child to live at his own pace. Only when a child feels this kind of unconditional love can he feel safe and confident in his heart. This kind of unconditional love will bring great power to children, allowing them to explore boldly and fearless of failure. Parents who truly love their children must give them unconditional love. 02 If parents truly love their children, they must learn to endure hardship. If parents truly love their children, they must learn to endure hardship. Because anyone who survives in society has to endure hardships. If you can\’t bear any hardship, it means you can\’t adapt to social life. I have a friend. One day we were sitting together chatting and the topic of children’s studies came up. He said: \”I can\’t see the children studying from early to late, it looks too hard.\” This father loves his children very much, protects them at all times, and never lets them suffer. After his son graduated from college, he also looked for a job, but found it too hard and quit all the jobs. Now, his son is in his thirties and stays at home all day long. All he has left is complaining: life is too hard. Why does he complain that life is too hard? It is because parents are overprotective and children do not understand why life must be difficult. A few years ago, a piece of wall in my house was cracked, and I hired a craftsman to repair it. The next day, when the master worker came to work, he brought a boy who looked to be only fifteen or sixteen years old. I didn\’t know what the situation was, so I said: \”This little boy is on vacation. Please help.\”Dad is here to work, he is so sensible. The master immediately took over my words and said: \”My son is in the third grade of junior high school this year. He doesn\’t want to study. I asked him to come from his hometown during the holidays and let him work with me every day.\” Get up at five o\’clock every morning and run around the city with me. I have been working for almost a month now without a day off. Last night he said that he was going back to school. \”It turns out that this master\’s approach is really worth learning from other parents. Whether it is the hardship of study or the hardship of life, we must let our children know that if they want to survive in society, they must learn to endure hardship. If they do not endure the hardship of study, they will You have to endure the hardships of life. Children have learned to endure hardships since childhood, and it is not a bad thing. Only when children understand hardships can they not complain about life, and not run away or shrink when they encounter difficulties. As the saying goes: \”You can only be a human being if you have to endure hardships.\” \”Master\”. Only when children learn to endure hardship from an early age can they grow better and live a better life. 03 To truly love your children, you must let them learn to be independent. Yang Jiang\’s father said: \”It is better to educate children to be independent than to be number one.\” The purpose of parents in raising children is to help them grow better and better adapt to social life. Therefore, as parents, we must cultivate the ability of our children to live independently from an early age. However, in China, most children\’s lives are arranged by their parents. This has caused many children to become dependent on their parents. What parents do is actually depriving their children of their right to grow up. Many children have lost their right to grow up since childhood, and when they grow up, they become old people and giant babies. According to China’s Aging Statistics from the Scientific Research Center: More than 65% of families in our country have the phenomenon of supporting the elderly and the young. Among them, about 30% of young people have the ability to earn money, but still rely on their parents to pay for their living expenses. Remember the child prodigy Wei Yongkang? The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High School] high-quality VIP course catalog of various disciplines and famous teachers, click to view now! At the age of 17, he was admitted to the Chinese Academy of Sciences as a graduate student, but 3 years later, because his ability to take care of himself was too poor, he could not arrange himself at all He was eventually persuaded to quit his study and life. It turned out that in order to allow his son to study with peace of mind, his mother had been carefully taking care of his son\’s daily life, including serving him meals, bathing, and washing his face. When his son went to college, she also went to \”accompany him to study.\” . Parents take care of everything, causing children to be unable to take care of themselves. This is the tragedy of the family. Educationalist Mr. Tao Xingzhi said: \”Good parents watch over their children and let them grow up actively; bad parents do things for their children and let them grow up passively.\” If parents truly love their children, they must cultivate their children\’s ability to live independently from an early age. They must let their children know that they are the masters of life and should do their own things. 04 To truly love their children, they must respect their children. Some parents think that they are elders and always He tried to find a way to make his children obey him completely, but the result was counterproductive and caused tension in the parent-child relationship. In fact, being respected is everyone’s basic psychological need. Children need to be respected no matter how old they are. In life, parents must stand on equal footing with their children. position, respect the child\’s choice, respect the child\’s ideas, and respect the child\’s growth characteristics. Children who are respected by their parents will feel that they are loved, valued, and noticed. Such children have a higher self-esteem Sense of value.Some time ago, a photo was widely shared online. This is a notice to find the child\’s lost Ultraman card album. The notice ends with: \”This is a card that the child has saved for a long time. It is something he loves very much. If you find it, please contact us in time. It is very important. Thank you!\” Parents behave like this out of respect for their children, and they consider their children\’s feelings. When parents respect their children, they affirm their value and empower their children. This is also the true love parents have for their children. 05 Written at the end, the true love of parents for their children is not control, possession, or blind giving. Instead, give your children unconditional love and respect them so that they can grow better and become a better version of themselves. Only in this way can children have a sound personality and go further.