Teach the most important things to your children and yourself

In the circle of friends, a WeChat message came in, which made me cry. It\’s about a Japanese girl Chie who married a man named Yasutake Shingo. But she was weak and unable to give birth. But Qianhui was still pregnant and refused the doctor\’s dissuasion and decided to give birth to the child. After her daughter Ahua was born, Qianhui\’s illness broke out. Two years later, she couldn\’t even hold her beloved daughter. Qianhui thought: My daughter is growing up, and I will soon be gone forever. What should I leave behind for my daughter? On Ahua\’s 4th birthday, Qianhui gave her daughter an apron. Seeing Ahua using the knife, Qianhui\’s heart almost jumped out of her chest, but she still refrained from making a sound or reaching out. Qianhui said: Ahua, cooking is closely related to life. I want to teach you how to hold a kitchen knife and how to do housework. Studying can be put second. As long as you are healthy and can support yourself, no matter where you go or what you do in the future, , can survive. Stay alive. Soon, her mother Qianhui passed away. My father Xinwu said: Damn, this life is too difficult. I can’t see hope or the future. I’d better choose to get drunk. My father Xinwu collapsed and was drunk all day long, worrying about his responsibilities as a father. Suddenly, her daughter Ahua walked to the kitchen, moved a small stool, took out the kitchen knife, put the tofu on her little hand, slowly cut it, prepared the ingredients, and then turned on the fire… From then on, Ahua cooked and cleaned every day, Go to school by yourself and take care of yourself. At the same time, he also took care of his father who was drunk and confused. She would prepare dinner for her father and leave a small note: This is the meal Ahua made for dad, rice and side dishes. Dad, you must be brave and strong. This story touched countless people. The story of the sensible little girl Ahua was adapted into the movie \”Ahua\’s Miso Soup\”. When the movie was staged, Ahua was already 12 years old. The kind and wise mother Chie left her daughter a lifelong legacy. Many friends’ WeChat groups are discussing this story. ——As parents, you must teach your children the most important things in life. But what is the most important thing in life? A friend told his own growth story in a WeChat group using one voice after another. ——With his permission, we write this story here: He said that he envied a great woman like Qianhui, but his mother was very ordinary and his father was similar to Ahua’s father Shingo. His father was timid and taciturn. My mother is cowardly, and dare not raise her head when walking or speak loudly. Therefore, when he was young, he was introverted and timid, and was often bullied by children. My father and mother were very worried, so worried that they hugged each other and cried. One day when he came home from school, he saw his father sitting upright, with a book open in front of him, and said to him in a serious tone: Son, you are going to grow up. Mom and Dad discussed it and decided to teach him the most important thing in life. you. What is the most important thing in life? He was curious. It\’s talking. My father said: The most important thing in life is to speak clearly and clearly. Your parents are both stupid and can\’t speak out when something is right. I don\’t know how much they have suffered in this life. Right now, my son, you are like this too. You don\’t dare to speak when you see people. When you grow up, you will be like your parents at best. This won\’t work. So let’s start today and train you to speak every day. howWhat about training? Dad also washed his feet and went to the fields, and bought a book on lectures from the bookstore. I don’t know if this book will work or not, but I can only deal with it this way. After that, when he came home every day, his father and mother sat at the table and asked him to stand and explain clearly what he had encountered today or what he wanted to say to his parents. For a period of time like this, he said that he discovered many problems with language expression: – Many people can\’t speak at all and can only scream. They think that when others hear their angry screams, they have spoken, but this will only make others disgusted and cannot be counted as speaking clearly. ——Those who cannot speak cannot listen either. Some people, when someone else just opens their mouth, think they understand everything and can\’t wait to interrupt the other person. This is equivalent to exposing your shortcomings of insufficient IQ in front of your opponents, and you will have a particularly difficult life. ——The less you can speak, the easier it is for others to ignore your appeal. This makes people who can\’t speak even more angry. They can\’t understand what they say. At this time, they can only vent their emotions purely, cry and howl, and they can\’t communicate with others. ——People who can’t speak probably have logical obstacles. Coupled with emotional interference, what they say becomes even more meaningless. His most important discovery is that language expression is like swimming, and it stands to reason that people are born with it. Before the baby is born, he swims around in the womb, but when he comes to the world and cries for several days, he inexplicably can no longer swim. The same is true for language, which is similar to sports skills such as swimming and riding a bicycle. They are abilities that people are born with but forget for unknown reasons. Once you learn it again, you will never forget it and the benefits will be endless. Therefore, he said, language is a skill that requires training to master. If you don’t train, you think you can speak fluently and logically after reading a few emotional intelligence books. This kind of thinking is like holding a swimming manual – even if you memorize the swimming manual and jump into the water, it will still fill you up. Watery stomach. The training method is also simple, but it must be done in a group-just like the family in this story-otherwise, laziness will defeat you and prevent you from persisting. It is best to train as a family. They have a full meal, put away the dishes, coffee table, and chairs. The three members of the family take turns to perform, and the other two are referees. After training, he would summarize and assign tasks for tomorrow – the task he set for himself at that time was how to convince his parents to increase his living expenses or buy a bicycle tomorrow. Finally, he said: This training will benefit him throughout his life. From college to the workplace, he always treated his classmates and colleagues in a rolling manner. He said he was grateful to his parents throughout his life. ——Real education, a lifetime of touching. Cooking was regarded by Qianhui as the most important thing in life, and she taught it to her daughter before she died. This friend in the WeChat group shared with everyone that his parents regarded language expression as the most important thing in life and taught him. There is a man in the United States who is very outrageous. He regards drilling wood to make fire as the most important thing in life, and he taught his son how to do it. The thing is like this, this dear friend is famous in the industry, especially in China. His books are regarded as the source of wisdom and sell like crazy. The man was so excited that he came to China to occupy land for horse racing, but suddenly there was a fire in the backyard. His son suddenly rushed out and cut off his escape path.. My son said: I don’t want to study anymore. Reading is useless. Talking nonsense, the old man suddenly became anxious: Why is reading useless? Look at the villa you live in and the luxury you enjoy. Isn’t it all earned by your father writing books? If your father didn\’t study, could you live such a life? Pooh! The son said: Don\’t force your shameless life on me. I have my dignity and my pursuit. What is your pursuit? The son said: What is my pursuit… Eat when you are full, sleep when you wake up, eat when you wake up, and live like a pig, is the happiest life. What… The father was anxious and left a lot of money without making any money. He went home to talk earnestly and do his son\’s ideological work. But he always insisted that his son did not have enough food and salt and refused to go to school. Whether this is adolescent rebelliousness or a genetic mutation is really a mystery. Or maybe this child is too in need of love, so he wants to keep his father by his side? In short, this man will stay at home and accompany his son from now on. The purpose of accompanying my son is to let him grow up. So he would try to find out his son\’s interests every once in a while. But the son was highly alert to this. He had no interest in anything. He just wanted to lie on the sofa and watch his father become so worried that his hair turned white, and he cried bitterly every night. He feels so happy. This state lasted for a whole year. Maybe the father really aroused his son\’s interest, or maybe the son was tired of the trouble and planned to let his father go. So the father and son decided to use the most primitive tools to actually drill wood to make fire. The narrative text of this story states that making fire by drilling wood is not as easy as you think. It involves human sociology, botany, aerodynamics, marine climatology, materials mechanics, computational mathematics… and many other advanced subjects. The story goes: The child finally regained his interest in life and can face his own life bravely. This diligent father like an old scalper has returned to China and embarked on his happy road of making money… and so on. What is the most important thing in life? Poet Lu Youyou: The most important thing in life is to be scientific, orderly, and effective, and to expand your comfort zone in life. …Lu You? Has he ever said such a cool thing? There is something to say. The original words of the poet Lu You are: When I was young, I knew that things were difficult in the world, and when I looked north in the Central Plains, I looked at the mountains. …Nima, where are you? This poem by Mr. Lu You means: The less you know and the less you do, the easier it is to see things outside of your comfort zone. But when you take action and are full of confidence and ready to show off your skills, you find that something is wrong. When you are young, you know that things are difficult in the world – the word \”difficult\” is used well. What is hardship? The word \”Jian\” is composed of \”you\” and \”gen\”. The Book of Changes says: \”Gen\” means \”mountain\”, \”gate\” and \”dog\”. ——You look at things as simple and easy, but when you take action, you realize that you need to climb one mountain, then another mountain, then another mountain, and then another mountain. It\’s just a matter of going over mountains and ridges, but there are dogs in front of you, yelling at you: \”Wow, wow, stop…\” The word \”hard\” means to stop you, to stop you, to stop you again and again, and not to stop you. , this matter is not over yet! Once you stop, your life will be in trouble. In fact, many things are very simple. But if this matter is located in the comfort of your lifeOutside the appropriate zone, you will be constrained when doing it, and the experience will be quite bad. Many people have had to terminate due to such bad experiences. But every time we stop, we are firmly trapped in our comfort zone. Therefore, no matter how many times we fail, we must complete one or a few things successfully. Like Ahua, learn to cook. Like friends on WeChat, learn to express yourself fluently. For example, the bear son in the United States who is fighting with his father learned to make fire by drilling wood. The value of these things lies in expanding your psychological comfort zone. To evaluate a person, you must look at his abilities. What is ability? It\’s this person\’s comfort zone. If a person\’s psychological comfort zone is large enough, he will be able to handle things with ease in this field, and troubles will disappear in his hands. We will say that this person is very capable. On the contrary, a person\’s psychological comfort zone is too small, and he has only empty imagination about things outside the comfort zone. It is easy to imagine, but if you cannot do it yourself, you will blame others endlessly. If you have a very low opinion of others, but your own life is extremely miserable, you will angrily think that the world is extremely unfair and you have wronged yourself. Only the effective expansion of the comfort zone can restore happiness and peace to our hearts. The most important thing in life is the most memorable thing in your life, the first thing that seems impossible at first but you finally accomplish. It might be the first time you give a speech on stage, it might be the first time you confess your love to a girl, it might be the time you read a book completely and be able to comment on it with others. It may be that you wrote and published a book, it may be your first time applying for a job, the first time you boldly ask your boss for a salary increase, the first time you start a business… No matter how small it is, if you have never done it, you will not know it. its inner processes. No matter how big a thing is, if you accomplish it, you will find that it is nothing more than that. A strong person is as gentle as water, while a weak person is as angry as a tiger – in fact, where does a strong person come from in this world? Where are the weak? You are strong just because you have the courage to break out of your own psychological comfort boundaries. You are weak just because you dare not step out of your comfort zone. You are the strong one and you are the weak one. The difference lies in whether your heart will become brave driven by the dignity and responsibility of life! The world is so big, but your comfort zone is so small. Everyone has difficult days, make your heart brave and broad, love the people who love you, do what you should do, and always expand the free space of life. This is the most important thing in our lives.