In daily life
We often encounter many unexpected setbacks and difficulties
These small problems may gradually escalate into major conflicts
Even lead to the breakdown of the relationship
Some couples can Separate calmly and rationally and live their own lives
But there are also some people who cannot get rid of past emotional entanglements
Falling into confusion and contradiction
Some people are divorced but remain close to their ex-husbands relationship
Even living together
Such behavior makes people think
What exactly do they think
Perhaps listening to the voices of these three women
can give those Some warnings and revelations for people who are going through similar experiences
01 “Is separation impulsive or emotional?”
Ms. L’s story:
At first, we didn’t think about divorce. We have a very good relationship, and even if we quarrel, we make up quickly.
However, as my mother-in-law came to live with us, our quarrels became more and more intense. We are both under 30 years old, we have only been married for two years, and due to the epidemic, his income has been unstable.
My mother-in-law urged us to have a baby, but considering the realistic pressure and age factors, I didn’t want to have a baby so soon. My mother-in-law thought that I was delaying her progress in having her grandson, and began to put pressure on our marriage.
He could remain impartial at first, but then gradually fell to his mother\’s side. He brought his mother to live with us without consulting me.
When my mother-in-law came, she used various native methods to urge me to have a baby, but I was unwilling. Although he knew about my dissatisfaction, he acquiesced in my mother-in-law\’s approach and advised me to be patient.
In the end, we chose to divorce because we couldn\’t bear the conflicts and pressure between both parties. After the divorce, I moved out, but we still kept in touch occasionally.
Once, when we met at a friend\’s wedding, we naturally took a taxi back to our old home because we were drunk. That night we had a serious conversation about having children. Although he tried to convince his mother, now he still can\’t convince me.
Currently, we are still single and still have feelings for each other. No one can predict what will happen in the future.
Some people get divorced just because of impulse and will regret it after getting the certificate. Although the relationship has ended, there is still love and nostalgia in the heart. Therefore, this relationship can easily become disconnected.
As long as one party is willing to compromise, the problem can be solved. Maybe you don\’t have to wait too long to get back together.
02 “They made the same mistakes again
Ms. Z’s story:
There was no drama in our divorce. I don’t know why, but the relationship slowly faded away. No matter what I said, , both feel out of place with each other
Maybe it’s because we are.Too busy and neglecting each other\’s feelings and needs. We have been married for seven years and our child is five years old, but we still cannot avoid the seven-year itch.
He always puts work first and rarely spends time with me and my children. Eventually, he fought for custody during the divorce, but the child was ultimately awarded to him.
However, not long after the divorce, he brought the children back to me because of work needs.
A few months ago, he was transferred back to the company, but he took the child away again. I was so worried that I visited the kids every week. Every time he sees me, the child will cry and say that his father comes home late every day and he is scared to be alone.
Although the child is taken care of by his grandmother, the grandmother is not close to the child, and the child feels very lonely. Every time my children hold me and cry and ask me if I can come back and live with them, after hearing this, my tears can’t stop flowing down.
Eventually, we decided to live together again for the sake of our children. Since I returned, I can see that he has changed a lot and has given up many social activities to spend time with his children.
Now, he is considering remarriage. As long as the children live well, everything will be worth it.
03 “I don’t want to make the other party feel better”
Ms. In our common house, one person holds half of the property rights. No one wants to move out and live alone unless the other person\’s half of the money is converted into cash and paid off in one lump sum.
We signed an agreement that we are each responsible for our own meals and bedrooms and will not interfere with each other. Sometimes they deliberately create small problems to irritate the other person, just because they don\’t want to make the other person feel comfortable.
We are no longer young, and our children have all gotten married and started families. At this age, love is no longer the most important thing. However, we just don’t want to see the other person live better than ourselves.
Now, our relationship is like roommates, and we still dislike each other. The children all advised us to live separately, but we have become accustomed to this old place and cannot leave.
At least, our current situation is pretty good, and no one will step in to cause more trouble and burden to the children.
Between husband and wife, it is inevitable that there will be overnight feuds. Some couples are not happy living together and do not want each other to live well after separation.
The resentment accumulated over a long period of time is sometimes difficult to understand and cannot be resolved. After divorce, they could have lived their own lives without interfering with each other, but some people would rather face each other every day and hate each other than just be a bystander.
04 \”Written at the end\”
The complexity of marriage lies in the diversity of human nature. Some people believe that since they are divorced, they should end it cleanly. Others are indecisive and entangled as the divorce process itself is already chaotic.
This is actually a matter of personal choice. As long as youIf you can bear the consequences without regretting your decision, others can only use four words to express it: respect and blessing.
