Raising a well-spoken boy is not easy!

I found that communication is challenging when there are boys in the family. For example, I answered a phone call yesterday, and my son kept arguing with his cousin. I covered the phone and said, \”Keep your voices down, I need to answer the phone.\” The two people ignored me and continued to argue. Wait until I finish the call. Pulling the boy over, he pulled his ears. \”Did you hear that just now?\” The boy looked innocent and said nothing. It seems that he doesn\’t want to explain, or he doesn\’t even know about it, right? I looked at him seriously and said, \”I will establish a new rule today. From now on, when adults answer the phone, you must keep quiet, otherwise you will be punished.\” At this time, he listened and nodded. When communicating with a boy, you should look at him like this and speak seriously. Studies have pointed out that men communicate more through postures, facial expressions and body movements than through words. This characteristic is also reflected in the little boy. For example, every time my son talks to me, he always asks me to look at him and has to turn my head away. For example, if he finds a funny picture book illustration or makes something he thinks is amazing, he will come to me. If I am busy, I will reply with a hum, \”I know, I know.\” As a result he was unhappy. Because there was no expression on my face, I was still busy with my own business. To him, this was ineffective communication. So every time your child asks you to talk, be sure to really get involved. For the little guy, parents should squat down, look at his face, and respond seriously. In fact, we ourselves will have the same feelings in our lives. Every time I want to tell my wife something, if she is busy looking in the mirror at the table and applying some toner or something. I would be very anxious, and would even pull her over. I would have to look at her face and speak before I could make her understand. And she will always say, \”I\’m listening. In fact, I already know what you want to say.\” Because women can intuitively pick up these non-verbal messages to a large extent. Therefore, many mothers also think that their children have this function, especially mothers of boys. Because of this \”misunderstanding\”, the boy will be blamed for being unreasonable. For example, many times when my son was playing with his cousin, he would grab his sister\’s shoulders and ask her to listen to him. My wife would say, \”Listen, sister, don\’t be so rude, just say it.\” But the son would always insist on asking his sister to look at him. I was extremely anxious and received a lot of criticism for it. Girls are often better than boys in communication skills. Scientific research also shows that the corpus callosum, a cluster of nerves connecting the left and right brains, is larger in women than in men. This allows women to have better connections between the left and right brains and communicate more smoothly. There is no way, many things are just natural. So we must understand the boy\’s \”relative lag\” and some \”weird\” behaviors. In fact, if we observe enough boys. You will find that they are more interested in fast-moving objects and things that stimulate vision. Therefore, many mothers find that their sons are not interested in static books and words. But they are very interested in video games, and cartoons can also keep them highly focused for a long time. andAnd, there is a characteristic that many teachers will recognize. The boy is very interested in physics and chemistry classes, especially experimental classes. Because the teacher was dancing and making gestures, and would also bring some teaching equipment to the classroom. Often can attract boys\’ attention. As for language courses such as Chinese and English. If the teacher\’s teaching methods are still old-fashioned. It will probably become a lullaby for many boys. Therefore, we really need to have a better understanding of these \”weird\” behaviors of boys. When a child hesitantly constructs his first long sentence. Please don\’t interrupt him. I found that although my son has a large vocabulary, his expressions are also good. But when speaking long sentences, I still pause. I listened patiently every time, waiting for him to explain it in a roundabout way. Often the words fail to convey the meaning and only explain half of the meaning. At this time, you can give him a small supplement to help him express his thoughts completely. And you can talk to him and see if there are any good words to express clearly. Patience and encouragement will give children the confidence to express themselves. Many boys are afraid to speak because they are teased many times when they speak. Or they were interrupted by anxious parents saying, \”Okay, okay, I understand.\” Some parents directly replaced it with their own words, and then added, \”Is that so? I can\’t tell even after so long.\” Children who dare not speak often have their emotions suppressed. Emotional problems can also occur in adulthood. For example, when I go on a date with a girl, I always stutter and don’t know what to say. Even if there were surging emotions in his heart, they turned into a few monotonous words on his lips. If there are boys in the family, parents should encourage and help their children to speak. If you always blame the boy for being disobedient, disobedient, and always distracted. Just look at how you speak. I find that many parents talk to their children this way. For example, a child is playing with a toy that he is particularly interested in. Or watching your favorite cartoon. But the meal is about to start. When the mother served the food, she began to give instructions in advance, \”Come on, it\’s time to eat!\” But the child didn\’t move. A few minutes passed. The second time he gave the order: \”Come quickly, do you hear me?\” Still no move. Wait until everything is ready. The child may not be moving yet. At this time it was mother\’s turn to take action. \”Baby, you are rebelling!\” Go directly to stop the child\’s behavior. At this time, the child is angry and often has to twist his tongue for a long time. The child is angry, but the mother blames him for being disobedient and says he has a bad temper. In fact, boys really \”can\’t hear\” when they are focused on their own things. Their ears will be closed and they will be immersed in their own world. It is recommended that you walk in front of your child when giving the first command. Tap him on the shoulder and let him see your face. Tell him how long you have. Or tell him clearly and clearly right away. It is much better than giving several ineffective instructions, making yourself angry and venting your temper on your child. There is a saying: \”Boys need to know goals, rules, and who has the final say.\” Boys all like \”goals\”, which should be natural. For example, in ancient times, the target could be understood as prey. huntedFeeding a tribe of prey was the men\’s goal. Therefore, when communicating with a boy, you might as well give him a clear goal. Instead of giving him a vague instruction. For example, I told my son before, \”Let\’s learn English today.\” He looked at me confused. But if I say to him, \”Let\’s learn these 26 letters today, and then get familiar with these 26 words. Dad will check whether you have completed this task later.\” Then he will immediately jump into action. The same goes for asking your child to do housework. Remember to give him a clear goal rather than a general instruction. Of course, there are also rules. With rules, a lot of communication will be simplified. Because the child will understand what to do. For example, my son hasn’t gone to kindergarten yet. So there must be rules at home every day. There is a rule: \”You can\’t turn on the TV in the morning, but you can watch it in the evening.\” So I don\’t have to worry about my children watching TV in the morning every day. What I fear the most is when there are no rules. Parents bargain with their children and compete with each other. Both adults and children are tired. In addition, the instructions at home cannot be messed up. You can\’t just say something to your mother and say something else to your father. And the child is more willing to follow the instructions of the person who sets the rules with him. Therefore, parents should cooperate more with each other. Ensuring that the rules are enforced is something that counts. Of course, the rules can be stricter, but the words can be gentler. More encouragement and praise are often more effective than scolding. You want your children to be gentle to others. Parents should pay attention to the way they talk to others and the way they communicate with their children. If you often speak harshly, you will be scolded. Then don\’t expect your child to become a good talker. How many misunderstandings have we had about boys in this seemingly simple matter of speaking? Parents still have a lot to do… Raising a well-spoken boy is not easy! In fact, many methods are also effective for fathers of children, so you might as well give them a try.