If you are not a good husband, you cannot be a good father.

Men have two roles in marriage and family: husband and father. However, there are always some men who subjectively ignore the responsibilities and affection contained in the role of \”husband\”, and still hold their heads high and say that they love their children wholeheartedly and deserve to be a good father. Yes, you love your child, provide her with the most expensive financial support, and take good care of her in daily life, but you have ignored that the indescribable thing of feelings has a subtle and silent impact. The first story tells about Jiang Xiaoyu, who is worried about gains and losses. Jiang Xiaoyu is my best friend in college. From the first time I met her, I thought this girl was very beautiful, but she seemed a bit aloof. As we got to know each other gradually, I asked Jiang Xiaoyu, with so many boys chasing you, are there none you can like? Jiang Xiaoyu smiled bitterly and said, \”You may think that my vision is too high. In fact, I just don\’t have confidence in myself. To be honest, I don\’t believe in love anymore.\” I couldn\’t help but exclaim, do you still have no confidence in yourself when you look like this? Don’t believe in love at such a young age? What unknown ups and downs have you experienced in love? Jiang Xiaoyu told me that it was indeed unknown, but it wasn’t her, it was her parents. When Jiang Xiaoyu was in her second year of high school, one day she got her period and had a stomachache. She asked for leave in advance and went home. As soon as she opened the door, she heard her parents arguing from the bedroom. The two of them were arguing so fiercely that they didn\’t notice Jiang Xiaoyu\’s arrival at all. She stood at the door and listened for a while, and suddenly she felt like she was struck by thunder. It turned out that my father had cheated on me, and my mother had conclusive evidence. My father loudly complained about all the things my mother did in her daily life, and my mother wailed and cried that I was the victim in the marriage. Jiang Xiaoyu yelled, and after a few seconds of silence, her parents rushed out of the bedroom and hugged her, trying to explain, good daughter, don\’t get me wrong, it\’s not what you think, it\’s okay. What else did they say after that? Jiang Xiaoyu said that she didn\’t listen at all and just kept thinking about one question. How could the father who loves his family and himself in her mind do things that hurt the family? Later, her parents seemed to have reconciled, and she thought everything could be as before. But then I vaguely heard my parents arguing in the bedroom with the door closed several times, which seemed to be related to my father\’s extramarital affair. Gradually becoming colder. Although the strong father\’s love has not changed at all, Jiang Xiaoyu has changed. The good daughter who once liked to stick to her parents now just wants to go to a foreign university as soon as possible so that she can get away from the home where her parents quarreled and had to carry her on her back; the little girl who once fantasized about Prince Charming flying in the colorful clouds has become She doesn\’t want to believe in long-term love, and is afraid that men will get bored and betray her. Yes, even the most trusting and dependent father has never let his daughter see the firmness of love, so how can she have the courage to believe in a man\’s long-term love? Finally, Jiang Xiaoyu said, my father has always loved me since I was a child. He has given me many gifts, but being hesitant and timid is the worst gift of all. The second story tells about Zhao Xiaotu, who plays the game life. Zhao Xiaotu is also a friend I met in college, a college beauty from another department. I met her because my buddy asked me to help chase her. I heard that Zhao Xiaotu’s father is a well-known local media person, his mother is a teacher, and his fatherMom was busy with her career when she was young, but she got a daughter when she was old, and she loves her even more. Especially Zhao Xiaotu\’s father, who takes great care of his daughter and is so considerate that he would be praised to the heavens. Zhao Xiaotu rarely mentioned her parents, but often brought a lot of delicious food to everyone when she went back to school on Sundays. When faced with our envy, she said lightly, \”My aunt bought it, and after eating it, I Let her buy it again. At one party, Zhao Xiaotu drank too much and talked about her parents and that aunt under the influence of alcohol. She said that her family was originally very good, and her father loved her and her mother, but suddenly one day a program planned by her father became popular, and her father also became popular, and suddenly she became a young women\’s idol, and she was so beautiful that she couldn\’t be found anywhere. Then, the young aunt appeared. My father still loves him, but he no longer loves his mother. He even thinks that the traditional marriage with his mother through introduction is too vulgar, and this extramarital affair is true love. Dad left a divorce agreement and turned around to pursue true love. Mom is determined not to sign. Anyway, I\’m done playing with you. Anyway, I\’m just wasted. Anyway, neither you nor that bitch can have an easy time. As a result, in Zhao Xiaotu\’s life, in addition to a father and a mother who didn\’t love each other, there was also an aunt who never left her despite the reputation of being a mistress. Dad often takes Zhao Xiaotu to his aunt\’s house for dinner. What he always says is that you are the good daughter that Dad will always love. But Zhao Xiaotu was very confused by this relationship. Sometimes she pitied her father, sometimes she sympathized with her mother, and sometimes she felt that her aunt\’s love was quite pure. I asked her while she was in a daze, will you accept my brother\’s pursuit? Zhao Xiaotu said categorically, \”No, I haven\’t played enough yet. My dad can play, why can\’t I?\” I was so scared that I poured half a kilogram of ecstasy soup into my buddy when I went back, making him forget about Zhao Xiaotu in the game life. After graduation, Zhao Xiaotu and I gradually lost contact. I accidentally heard a mutual friend mention that more than ten years have passed and she has never settled down. Unmarried, DINK, her boyfriend changes like a revolving door, but will she feel lonely and cold in her heart? The third story talks about Li Daye, who makes do. Li Daye said that his family couldn\’t be more ordinary. His parents don\’t cheat, they don\’t quarrel, they just don\’t talk much. Li Daye felt that his father loved him very much, but his affection for his mother was a bit weak, and the atmosphere at home was a bit boring. Why don\’t you want to get married if you don\’t love enough? don\’t know. Maybe most couples are like this, living together, which is really boring. Li Daye would also be very envious when he heard other people\’s children being tortured by their parents in various ways. He thought, when I have a wife in the future, I will have to give her all my love and passion. Without love, what kind of family is there? So Li Daye went for love with passionate enthusiasm, but after a few paragraphs, he was exhausted. Every girl I have dated feels very good, but all of them have their own faults. A is smart and beautiful, but spends money lavishly; B is diligent and thrifty, but lacks interest in life; C is artistic and playful, but cannot handle housework. Li Daye never lasts long in any relationship. Once he discovers the other person\’s shortcomings, he starts to retreat and becomes overwhelmed. Li Daye doesn\’t understand that there is no perfection in this world, and what is needed is the ability to be tolerant. In fact, the girls also like Li DayeThere is a lot of dissatisfaction, because even in the love stage, Li Daye did not know how to express his love to the girl, and he could not speak or do things that could properly reach the girl\’s heart. Li Daye was used to the indifference between his parents. When he wanted to love someone, he realized that he didn\’t know how to treat someone well. His talented and upright father taught Li Daye to read history and essays, and to be honest and kind to others, but he failed to teach him the ability to tolerate and love others. Li Daye felt more and more powerless, and gradually did not want to bother with it, and accepted his inability to love. Later, Li Daye got married to a girl who could make do with it. The state of his father\’s marriage was eventually scattered on Li Daye, and he lived a life without love and interest. I once read a survey asking fathers with daughters if they would like their daughters to marry a man who is exactly like themselves. The vast majority of the answers were, no. Oh, it’s not that these men are not confident enough, and they know themselves too well. I am not a good husband, but I will be a good father, and my daughter deserves better. This is the subtext in their hearts. However, fathers, do you know that whether it is a daughter or a son, a father\’s attitude towards marriage and lovers has a profound impact on their views on mate selection, which is related to a lifetime of happiness. Father\’s love for mother can make children feel beautiful love and steady happiness; on the contrary, parents\’ constant fighting or cold violence will make children fear, resist and be bored with marriage and love. Husband and father, these two roles are inseparable throughout life. If you are not a good husband, how can you be a good father? Loving children starts with loving the family and loving the mother. This kind of love will give the children a better future.