My child, if you don’t treat others badly, life will not treat you badly either.

The weather has been nice recently, so basically all indoor activities have been canceled on Saturdays and Sundays. If I have the chance, I take my children to the park to play. Once, several strange children were playing on the basketball court in the park. Some were riding twisters, some were riding scooters, and some were riding balance bikes. They were both three or four years old, and they quickly became familiar with each other. They would play together for a while, and then play a game of catching up with each other. The boy riding the Twister, after playing bulldozing for a while, suddenly wanted to play on a scooter. He politely said to a little boy: \”Brother, can you ride my Twister and I ride your scooter? The little boy was very willing to exchange, and took the initiative to pull over the very new Mi Gao scooter. He said readily: \”Here you go! \”No one expected that an embarrassing scene would occur – the little boy\’s grandmother was not happy and directly threatened her child: \”This is the new car you just received yesterday. If your brother doesn\’t return it to you when you want to play with it, Don\’t cry in front of me! \”The little boy looked at his grandma\’s face and took the scooter back. Another little boy riding a scooter was playing in the dirt. He said kindly: \”Let me ride mine for you.\” On the way back, I asked classmate Zhe: \”If my little brother wants to switch to riding a balance bike with you, will you switch?\” He thought seriously for a while and said: \”If I don\’t play, I can let him ride it; even if I don\’t want to play with the twist car, I can lend it to him to ride for five minutes.\” \”During his sensitive period of property rights, many friends have read my article \”Yes, I\’m That Bastard\”, and most mothers agree that children\’s choices should be respected. Some friends also question whether this will make children selfish. , Self? In fact, only when children establish \”self\” can they think about others. Those children who \”sacrifice themselves for others\” usually have weaker happiness when they grow up – no one will always give without asking for anything in return. When they know how to please themselves , can make others happy. When children successfully pass the sensitive period of property rights, they will gradually gain the joy of sharing in social life. They will be very happy when giving gifts to others and receiving gifts from others. Their exchange and sharing will start from Don’t measure the monetary value of items, just follow your heart. For example, one time, classmate Zhe exchanged the candied haws he just bought for a wooden stick picked up by a child, and abided by the agreement of “not buying candied haws again within a week.” That stick I kept the stick at home for a week and played with it almost every day. This kind of sharing and exchange is not cost-effective in the eyes of adults, but this kind of simplicity of \”not treating others badly\” brings more happiness to the children. Friend Y said: Everyone is very easy-going. When I meet the cleaning lady in the elevator to move things, she will help push the elevator; when the waiter serves food in the restaurant, she will help open the door; when traveling, when the tour guide is occasionally too busy, she will help count the heads. Last year she sold a house and bought a house, and became friends with the agent guy. When it comes to agents, most people will frown and think that in order to make money, they will do a lot of unprincipled things. For example, they will lower the seller’s price while raising the buyer’s price. Psychological expectations. And Y has never suspected her agent with malicious intent. She made her needs clear and apologized for being a few minutes late for the appointment. Once, she traveled across half of Beijing to see a house and walked to the agent at the door. I received a call from the seller again, saying that there was an impromptu meeting.She didn\’t blame him at all for being unable to leave. In her words, \”Xiao Wang was very impatient even if he was caught in the middle. No one wanted to close the deal more than him.\” Another time, there was a strong north wind blowing in Beijing, and the agent Come and send her a form, and she needs to fill in the information completely. It was over 20 degrees in the house and it was as warm as spring. Outside, the house faced the elevator room, and a cold breeze kept coming in. She asked the young man to come in and wait. Maybe it was the company\’s policy not to enter the customer\’s door, so the young man insisted on standing outside the door. Finally, Y\’s husband pulled the young man in and said, \”Our family doesn\’t have much to do. We all came to Beijing to work hard. I understand how difficult it is for you.\” Y also poured him a cup of tea to keep warm. The young man\’s eyes suddenly turned red and he thanked him repeatedly. After that, the young man saw a suitable house in the background and was the first to recommend it to Y. Finally, I negotiated the price face to face with the seller, and tried my best to help discuss Y\’s expectations. On weekdays, more than one person says that Y\’s posture is too low. But Y enjoys it. She has many ordinary friends, because she makes others comfortable as well as making herself comfortable; she also has many good friends, because it has become a habit of hers to consider others appropriately. Precisely because she never treats others badly in relationships, when she has something to do, people around her will take the initiative to help her without opening her mouth. When I first graduated, I had a colleague who I thought was nice upon first contact: sweet-tongued and good at chatting. But as time went by, I discovered that that was not the case: everyone ate together, and although the AA system was not explicitly stated, the default was to take turns paying the bill. But every time it was his turn, he would either go out to answer the phone or go to the toilet. The first few times we thought it was a coincidence, but gradually we understood that it was a routine. We also understood that he always said that the cigarette was gone, the pen was gone, the change was gone, and if he borrowed it, there would be nothing, and it was also a routine. When I first came to Beijing, I met a literary friend who was also an editor in a magazine. Later, the magazine\’s profits were not good, and many people left their jobs. She was the only one who continued to work with the editor-in-chief. After nearly three months, she and the editor-in-chief were responsible for a 64-page magazine. The reason was that \”she always encouraged me to write articles. Only then can I come to Beijing from my hometown, and I must not be a heartless person.\” Later, the editor-in-chief worked on a new magazine and it made great progress. The first thing he thought about was poaching my literary friend as a senior editor, and his salary tripled. People who are too fond of taking advantage of small things will not have a big picture. Those who know how to \”take losses in a principled manner\” will have a better future. In this sense, I hope that my child will be the one who knows how to suffer losses and is willing to suffer losses – suffering some losses when he is a child is so that he will suffer less when he grows up. Therefore, in interpersonal communication, if like Y, you can think in advance \”what can I give to others\” instead of \”what can others give me\”; or like that literary friend, if you know how to be grateful and repay the kindness of others, a relationship will go smoothly. The farther you travel, the wider your network, and the more favors you receive in life.