Why do some women regret giving birth and others don\’t?

One day Lao Chen Anluoluo said to me, who do you think is more important, my daughter or me? I said, do you want to hear the truth? You\’re just bringing shame upon yourself. \”The child was born to me. In terms of blood relationship, you and I are relatives, and we are connected by blood.\” Lao Chen said pessimistically, feeling that he has to work harder to be qualified to be with you for a long time. Relatives. Many people feel desperate after giving birth to a child. They quarrel with their husbands every day, fight with their mother-in-law, and fall out with the whole family. However, I want to say, have you ever thought about why you wanted to have a child in the first place? I don\’t quite understand. Because a woman must give birth to a child for herself. The sperm belongs to others, but the eggs are your own, and the uterus that will carry you for ten months is also your own. Therefore, when you want to have a child, you will be happy to have a child. In my opinion, a woman\’s greatest and most basic right to independence is not how much money she has, who she is married to, or what achievements she has made, but rather her right to choose whether to have children and when to have children. The sister of a friend of mine recently heard that she was getting divorced. Three years after she gave birth to four children. When her sister just graduated, she was traveling around in sales and fell in love with a client. Please note that this man is definitely not a rich man, but if you fall in love with him, you will fall in love with him. You know, before this, her sister had vowed not to have children. But in order to satisfy the man\’s family, he gritted his teeth and gave birth to a daughter in the first year. It didn\’t matter, but because the man\’s family valued boys over girls, her sister worked particularly hard to have children. She gave birth to three daughters in a row, and finally gave birth to a son with her fourth child. However, after giving birth on the last day, her sister realized that she had completed the task and suddenly woke up. Why did I have to have so many children? I don’t want to have a baby, so why should I have one for this man? Does he really love me, or does he want me to have a boy to \”carry on the family line\” in the traditional sense? The day they wake up is the day when family conflicts break out on a large scale. Once a person\’s mentality changes from \”I do\” to \”I don\’t want to\”, even seeing the scar of a laparotomy is disgusting. She remembered that her first three babies were delivered naturally, but the fourth one was difficult to deliver, so she chose a caesarean section. I met her sister in that marriage. She was probably venting her resentment. I had not yet given birth to a child at that time. She said, you must remember that if you do not want to have a child, you must not give birth to a child casually. \”When you are willing to have a child, you are really willing, that is, the kind that is willing to suffer, to be tired, and to give everything for you; in addition, once you are separated from your own wishes, a few years later, the one who made you When the motivation to have children fades away, you are particularly likely to regret it.\” There is an argument now that men should cherish every woman who gives birth to a child for you. What I want to tell women is that they should cherish the initiative to have children and cherish themselves at every moment. Sometimes, women are always stupid, thinking that having children is the guarantee of your life, and then they bet their life\’s glory and wealth on their children; there are also some people who regret it after giving birth to children. I have seen too many women who hope to have a child so that their husband will treat you well; they hope to have a child so that their husband’s family will look at you with admiration;As a child, let yourself control the wind and rain at home. If you think this way, you will regret it. Your husband won\’t treat you well because of the children at all. He treats the children well because of the children, but it has nothing to do with you. For your husband\’s family who has to prove it by giving birth to children, you just completed the task for them. As for the possibility of trying to control the situation at home. , you really can’t rely on children, you can only rely on yourself to find a sense of existence. And you, have you ever thought that when you are not willing to do it, your shit and pee every day will become the biggest burden. Your family does not support you and you feel that you have fallen into an abyss. As a result, I lost my youth and figure, left stretch marks, a tired face, and what else? Every day from now on, you feel that all the tiredness is the suffering you have suffered, and the days have become boring. The top proposition of having a child is that it is really because you want to have a child, not anyone else. You will never be looked down upon just because you have a child for someone else. And if you live a life where you are not looked down upon, it is easy to regret it. A woman is only happy for the children she gives birth to. In other words, even if you get divorced, you can happily take your children with you. Just like when I just gave birth to my child, I didn’t want a second child, but now I really want it. At that time, both parents meant that they must have a second child as soon as possible because both parents would get old. However, what I was thinking about was that the caesarean scar on my body hadn’t healed yet, the child hadn’t grown up yet, and I hadn’t recovered from the pain. Now, I want to find a sibling of my own for my children. After Lao Chen and I grow old, they can stay together and not be alone. So, I want to have a second child. Lao Chen said, are you ready? It will be very difficult and tiring, and the financial pressure on both of us will also increase. I only said one thing, if I give birth to a baby, of course I must do everything possible to help her grow up, such as working harder on my own, getting support from my family, and working hard to make money. So, someone asked me, if you live in a different place, is it difficult for you to raise your children alone? I would tell them: Everyone thinks I am not taking care of my children, but only a few people will understand. Giving birth to and raising children is something you do willingly, so why do you have to let everyone know about you? Only by doing what you want to do, what you are willing to do, and not giving up your rights will you get the greatest respect. The same goes for marriage. I hope you will always be that child who has a pure heart towards life and yourself, never force yourself and never embarrass yourself. If you like it, nod; if you don\’t like it, shake your head. There is so much helplessness in the world, it\’s just that you always help others to embarrass yourself. And you must always remember that wherever you stand, you are heading in the direction you want.