What happens to parents who cannot control their emotions?

I saw the news in the past two days. On April 30 this year, a young mother lost control of her emotions. It was said in the news that she took her family on a self-driving trip that day, and there was her old mother and her one-year-old child in the car. During the trip, she had a few quarrels with her mother. She angrily parked the car on the highway acceleration ramp, locked the door and drove off. At this time, the outdoor temperature was around 30 degrees, and the temperature inside the car was rising rapidly. The mother and her one-year-old child were sweating profusely and their faces were red. The mother called the mother\’s phone, but she never answered. Fortunately, the highway traffic police arrived in time. After failing to contact the mother, they decisively smashed the car window with a hammer and rescued the old man and the child who were trapped in the car for more than 2 hours. The child\’s \”face was red from being stuffed, his hair was completely wet, and his tears had dried but he was still crying.\” The traffic police finally contacted the child\’s mother. The mother learned about the entire rescue process. She blamed herself and kept saying, The traffic policeman expressed his gratitude. This mother is by no means the only example of parents who act recklessly without regard to the consequences when they are angry and willful, losing control of their emotions. Just two days ago, there was a news report about a mother who went to pick up her 6-year-old son from school. The child was playful and wanted to go to a nearby store. Since the persuasion was ineffective, the mother threatened the child and threatened him if he didn\’t obey. Mom left first. Unexpectedly, the mother just walked away for a few seconds, and when she looked back, the child disappeared. The mother hurriedly called the police, and the police mobilized surveillance and coordinated the search. It took more than three hours to find the child who was lost alone. Every time I see news like this, I feel lucky that the child is okay. What a risk, you were just a little bit close to losing this child. As an adult, as a parent of a child, no matter how bad the situation is, you must try hard to become the master of your emotions, because once you become a slave of your emotions, you will constantly threaten, rage and intimidate your children, and even create grudges with others. If any anger is implicated in the child, it will greatly harm the child\’s sense of security, and it is also extremely easy to cause alienation in the parent-child relationship. The inevitable result is that parents feel that they have given everything for their children, but their children do not appreciate it and always find it difficult to be close and communicate with their parents. The so-called \”white-eyed wolf\” is often the bitter result of parents being controlled by their emotions. As mentioned earlier, although the two mothers were willful and emotional, they could be said to be lucky. Thanks to the timely help of the police, it did not lead to a major disaster in the end. There will be countless opportunities to enjoy parent-child happiness in the future, but not all rages will have the chance to be forgiven. Just on May 4 this year, a 27-year-old mother also lost control of her emotions. On the night of the 4th, she prepared dinner for her 3-year-old son and asked the child to come over to eat. But the son was too playful and ignored his mother even after calling her several times. This made the young mother very angry. She called her son to the toilet in anger and slapped and kicked his abdomen to teach him a lesson. Unexpectedly, his son immediately developed symptoms such as nasal bleeding, cold hands and feet, and confusion. Seeing her son like this, the mother was heartbroken and regretful. She took the extreme method of slitting her wrists and committing suicide to express her guilt. thisWhen the mother\’s cousin came home, she discovered the condition of the mother and son and sent them to the hospital. Rescue of the child failed, and the mother was hospitalized and surrendered to the public security organs. This poor child was only 3 years old. Just because of a mouthful of food and because his mother failed to control her emotions, his life was frozen. It is certain that this mother is at fault and should be punished, but for a mother who raised her child until he was 3 years old and is willing to pay for it with her life after something happens to her child, I think it is unfair to say that this mother is extremely evil and has a vicious heart towards her child. I can only say that she is impulsive. It\’s the devil. Bad emotions are the devil. If you don\’t control it, it will devour you. Not all children will always be warm little angels. When children are disobedient and ignorant, it is human nature and even human instinct to be angry. But as parents, we must be wary of such bad emotions. Words spoken in a moment of anger, slaps slapped in a moment of anger, may ultimately leave our children physically and mentally scarred. And this is certainly not what we want. A father once said that he also knew that the best emotions should be reserved for his family. But everyone knows the basic truth, that is, when your temper comes up, you can\’t control yourself. There are even times when the child who has made a mistake has to be pulled over and spanked twice to feel better. Thinking about it afterwards, I felt that it was unnecessary and that I had done something wrong. very sad. In fact, in the process of raising children, it is normal to have negative emotions. I think the key is to see how parents guide and resolve them. ☞Accept your own and your child’s emotions. I observed a mother forcing her child to wear a fleece jacket. The child said she wanted to wear a shirt, and a heated argument ensued. The mother started nagging her child about the time when he didn\’t wear enough clothes and caught a cold, and continued to talk about how the child didn\’t pay attention to his studies, couldn\’t do anything, and was stubborn. The child contradicted the mother and said that the mother didn\’t understand anything and hoped that the mother wouldn\’t care about anything. Neither side gave in, and finally the mother yelled at the child to wear it if he liked it, or get out if he didn\’t. We often call bad emotions \”anger.\” Most of the time, fires don’t break out all at once. Instead, there were sporadic sparks first, and then they developed into flames, which were blown by the wind and ignited. Finally, they burned more and more and became a disaster. The war between parents and children is the same as the anger of parents towards their children. If the mother could detect the sparks of anger earlier, she could put out the fire earlier. Whether the child is cold or not is a matter for the child. If you worry about the child, you can help bring a piece of clothing for the child, or let the child freeze once and let him take responsibility for his willfulness. It is far better than digging up old scores and making harsh words to add fuel to the fire and intensify it. The contradiction is much stronger. When parents are willing to observe and accept their own and their children\’s emotions early, many arguments will disappear. ☞Calm yourself down first before making a decision. There is a joke on the Internet, which says that when you feel that you are about to collapse due to childish anger, you must control the ancient power in your body, sink your anger in your Dantian, practice your internal skills, and stabilize the boat of family ties and move forward steadily: Do After coaxing, kissing and hugging each other, I silently said in my heart that this baby is my biological, biological, biological! ! ! I inherited this gene, I inherited it, I inherited it! ! ! If you find out that she actually inherited it from her father and you want to get furious, please also say this silently in your mind.I chose her father, I chose, I chose! ! ! I deserve it, I deserve it, I deserve it! ! ! The jokes are meant to make people laugh, but they are not without reason. When you feel that your emotions are about to burst out, count silently from 1 to 10 in your mind, or tell your children that mom and dad are very angry and need to calm down your emotions now, and then find a quiet place to calm down. These are all very good ways. . Getting angry and yelling will not solve the underlying problem. A really good education must require parents to have enough patience. Only when you calm down can you avoid making a big mistake. ☞Make plans with your children to reduce conflicts. The same is true for children who linger and refuse to eat. Parents who are controlled by their emotions will often scold their children, or even beat them roughly. But sensible parents will make their children understand that eating is not the responsibility of their parents. Ask him to accomplish something, but something that he needs to take the initiative to do. At these times, the importance of rules and planning is shown. Parents can tell their children that it is basic courtesy to respond to their parents\’ calls. It is wrong to not respond after calling several times. The corresponding punishment could be not being allowed to watch TV or not being allowed to play with certain toys. You need to eat on time. This can be discussed if there are special circumstances. If you make sure you don\’t eat, you have to bear the consequences. If parents set corresponding rules for their children at home, the children will know how to respect their parents, respect others, and be responsible for their own actions. As a child grows up, he is bound to face various problems. Don\’t like to do homework, like to play games, don\’t like to eat, etc., etc., etc., can be solved by making plans with the children and through reasonable cooperation and negotiation. A plan that the child agrees with will definitely be easier for the child to convince than repeated nagging, beating and scolding. ☞If it has gone too far, communicate with the child in time to remedy the situation. A friend said that his father also has a bad temper. He said that when he was a child, he begged his mother to buy a water gun. When he was excited, he sprayed water everywhere with the water gun, and accidentally sprayed his father. His father got angry on the spot and kicked him, then took the water gun and crushed him. My friend was so scared that he didn\’t dare to talk to his father when he went to bed at night. As a result, the next day, his father bought him a big new water gun and told him not to spray water randomly next time. My friend said that he always remembered this incident and felt warm every time he thought about it. Although my father has a bad temper and loves to get angry, he still loves him a lot. Although my friend\’s father went too far in this matter, it did not cause any psychological trauma to the child or estrangement between father and son. It was because the father made amends in time that he allowed the child to understand what he wanted and wanted. Parents who are willing to communicate with their children will never truly lose their children\’s hearts. I remember seeing this passage on a parenting Weibo: \”What is a truly strong mother? It is not remaining beautiful after giving birth to a baby, it is not writing good posts while raising a baby, and it is not holding the baby in one hand and resisting with one hand. A woman with a rice bag. But she was bitten while breastfeeding, scratched for her earrings, kicked in the stomach repeatedly while changing diapers, and when she turned around after giving the baby a bath, her hair, face, and bed were all covered with golden feces. Night after night, month after month, she couldn\’t continue. sleep\”After sleeping, the tone is still gentle.\” Not only mothers, but also fathers. The biggest challenge after becoming a parent is that sometimes it is not feeding the child to sleep, cooking and dressing, but when the child is stubborn, oily and salty. When we are not making progress, we can still remain patient and rational. But no matter how difficult it is, we still have to try. No matter how angry we are, we still have to control it. When we are dominated by emotions, the people we hurt are ourselves and our dearest children. When we become the masters of our emotions, we save ourselves and our children.