My child, why do I make you suffer [good and in-depth article]

When I went back to my hometown during the holidays, after taking a shower in the evening, I asked my daughter to wash her underwear as usual. I don’t want my mother-in-law to hear it. The grumpy mother-in-law yelled: \”What kind of clothes do you want such a small child to wash?\” \”Come on, dear, I\’ll wash it for you.\” Although her daughter was young, she was already used to doing her own things, so she didn\’t ask her to wash clothes for her. grandmother. The mother-in-law believes that the child must be pampered and not allowed to suffer any hardship. But I don\’t agree and I won\’t do it. I will deliberately cultivate my children\’s ability to endure hardship. If you don\’t have the ability to endure hardship, you won\’t be able to endure hardship. A child who can\’t endure hardship will have a hard time succeeding in life. Children who cannot endure hardship often do not know how to be grateful. There is such a thing that has been circulated on the Internet. In a family, the mother died when the child was very young, and the father raised the child alone. In order to prevent his children from being wronged, this father never remarried. This father is a cleaner, or worse than a cleaner. In short, the salary is very low. There is not much left to feed and clothe the children. But this father has never let his daughter suffer. The child was not willing to let her walk until she was 3 years old. At every meal, I try my best to cook my daughter’s favorite dishes, and I also try to make different recipes. He only ate the leftovers from his daughter’s food. When the child reaches the age of 16, his father still washes his underwear. My daughter often has new clothes to wear, but my father has not bought a new one for more than ten years. On his 40th birthday, my father wore new clothes, cooked his daughter’s favorite dishes, and happily waited at home for his daughter to come back from school to celebrate his birthday. When my daughter returns home, the first thing she sees is her favorite dish on the table. When the daughter discovered that her father was wearing new clothes at her father\’s prompting, her behavior was beyond most people\’s expectations. The daughter threw away the chopsticks with a \”pop\” sound, rushed to her father, and knocked her father to the ground. She sat on her father\’s body, pulled on his clothes, and asked him to take them off and go to the mall to change into her clothes. Dad was completely dumbfounded and burst into tears. The clothes were bought for him by his two sisters and his daughter\’s two aunts to celebrate his fortieth birthday. At that time, he was still thinking about asking his sisters to buy it for his daughter. After repeated insistence from his two sisters, my father accepted the new clothes. Now that his daughter is treating him like this, he doesn\’t even believe it is true. He didn\’t understand that he had been treating his daughter like a princess, and gradually her daughter really treated him as a servant. The princess hasn\’t bought new clothes yet, how can the servant buy new clothes? Aren\’t servants supposed to serve the princess in everything? Since you are her servant, how can she be grateful to you. You never taught her, how could she understand? If this father is willing to let his daughter suffer a little and let her understand the hardships of life, how can she not understand her father\’s hard work and difficulty, and how can she not be grateful for his dedication to her? Children who cannot endure hardship cannot stand on their own and have to rely on others throughout their lives. 28-year-old Xiao Dong has graduated from a bachelor\’s degree five years ago. His classmates have all achieved good results in their respective positions. But he has been unemployed at home and playing games all day long. If you want to spend money, ask your parents for it. Xiaodong\’s family is not wealthy. My parents are retired, and their combined retirement salary is less than 5,000 yuan per month. In order to supplement the family income, the 60-year-old mother can only go out to work. parentsI persuaded him many times, hoping that Xiaodong would go out and find a job. But every time Xiao Dong always responded confidently: \”I won\’t eat much from you. Staying at home without spending money will save much more than paying for me to go to college.\” This situation is not unique. Biasing has become a common problem in cities. The China Research Center on Aging has conducted a survey and found that more than 65% of families in China have the phenomenon of \”old people supporting young children\”, and about 30% of adults are basically supported by their parents. Behind every gnawing old man there is a family who is reluctant to let their children endure hardship. Because I have never experienced hardship, I dare not leave the house when I think about how hard it is to go to work. Even some young people who go out to find jobs often change jobs constantly. They find every job difficult and they can never find a suitable job. Sooner or later, such young people will go home to grow old. Children who cannot bear hardships are more likely to have unhealthy personalities. Xiao Lu, a 12-year-old boy with personality disorder, has divorced parents and follows his father. His father runs a foreign trade company and his family is wealthy. Xiao Lu\’s daily life is taken care of by a nanny. Xiao Lu\’s classmates have a very bad relationship, and they get into fights every once in a while. The smallest thing will cause fist fights. My deskmate accidentally crossed the 38th parallel line while doing his homework, and he knocked out two of his teeth. The father has been helping his son deal with the aftermath, paying medical expenses and visiting to apologize. He thinks that things that money can solve are not problems. When his classmates saw him, they all walked around. Worried about endangering the safety of his classmates, the teacher also deliberately prevented Xiao Lu from participating in some group activities. Xiao Lu was completely isolated. It is conceivable that Xiao Lu will use violence to solve any problem he encounters in the future, and his character will become more and more withdrawn. This reminds me of one of my college classmates: Xiaoxia. The first month after entering college, military training. The sun was like fire, and we stood on the concrete floor, baking under the scorching sun. The clothes get wet and then dry, and then dry and get wet again. Every day when I returned to the dormitory after military training, my back was covered with white flowers – it was salt frost. In this month, classmate Xiaoxia only took a bath once, and the only time she was forced into the bathroom was by her roommate. Later we learned that this was because Xiaoxia\’s parents doted on her very much and were reluctant to let her endure hardship. I never took a shower by myself before going to college. After entering college, I didn’t know how to manage my own life. Xiaoxia can\’t blend in with her classmates. He is very withdrawn and does everything alone. The classmates were not willing to go with her because she smelled disgusting. Flies especially like to circle around her. In the end, Xiaoxia couldn\’t even finish college. Nowadays, parents are generally reluctant to let their children endure hardship during Qingming Festival, so schools organize students to visit the graves of the martyrs at the cemetery. As soon as the news came out, neighbor Xiao Wang became extremely anxious. At one moment I was worried that my sixth-grade daughter could not walk, at another moment I had to send my daughter off, and at the next moment I had to ask the teacher for leave. With the persuasion of her friends, she finally forced her daughter to exercise. Return from sweeping the grave. Xiao Wang cried when he saw blisters on his daughter\’s feet. She held her daughter in her arms and confessed, saying that it was all her mother\’s fault and she would have known better and would not have let her go. She was very happy when her child came back, but when Xiao Wang cried like this, she felt deeply wronged. I will never participate in the same activities again. Nowadays, many children are picked up and dropped off by their parents when going to and from school without any exercise except physical education classes. Because parents are reluctant to let their children endure hardship. In this way, the weather will be slightly betterChange makes it easy to get sick. When a child gets sick, the whole family gets nervous and becomes even more pampered when the child recovers. In such a vicious circle, each of the children turned into Lin Daiyu. I think as a parent, if you really love your children, you should cultivate your children\’s ability to endure hardship. Only children who have endured hardship will understand their parents\’ suffering and be grateful to their parents; only then will their parents be able to take care of themselves when they grow old. Children who endure hardship can be independent, not dependent on others, and will not become parasites. Children who have endured hardship can withstand the wind and rain, and will not be hit by a little setback and become unable to stand up. A child who endures hardship will not have personality defects and will become a person with a sound personality. But what I mean by suffering is not just suffering, but enjoying both blessings and suffering. If you only know how to endure hardship, you will not know that happiness exists in the world. You will think that life is gray and your happiness index will be very low. Only children who have enjoyed both blessings and hardships will have the ability to be happy in the future, withstand wind and frost, and have sunshine.