You don’t understand these points and still want to educate “naughty children”?

\”Troublesome 3 Years Old, Crucial Before 6 Years Old\” mentions children aged 0 to 6 years old. We usually think of the words \”willful\”, \”crying\” and \”difficult to discipline\”. Children\’s various behaviors often make us Feeling helpless and powerless: Why do they always cry for no reason? Why do you always break things? What are the reasons for children’s “irrational behavior”? How do we educate it? This book is written by Maria Montessori, a world-renowned early childhood educator. By describing the physical and psychological characteristics of children aged 0-6 years old, the author reveals the mystery of children\’s growth and provides guidance for us to implement early childhood education. Today we will share with you four aspects of the book. ① \”Don\’t mistake \”oppression\” for love\” In life, we will always encounter situations where children are making trouble unreasonably, and they will cry and make a fuss whenever things don\’t go their way. However, is this really the case? One night, the mother asked the little boy to go to bed on time, and the little boy begged his mother to let him finish the remaining blocks, but the mother refused to give in at all. The little boy had no choice but to climb into bed, and then quietly slipped out of bed. He wanted to finish the work, but was severely scolded by his mother. The little boy didn\’t finish putting together the building blocks, and he couldn\’t convince his strong mother. He felt sad and helpless, so he had no choice but to cry to express his inner feelings. After reading this example, we will find that there are many similar scenes in life. We are used to imposing our own wishes on our children, thinking that everything we do \”is for the good of the children\” is an expression of love, but ignore that children\’s \”unreasonable behavior\” is because their needs have not been met, they want something, or I wanted to do something but we stopped me. What is the correct approach when encountering this situation? ——First, clarify the child’s real needs, for example, ask: “Why don’t you want to do it? What do you want to do?”; secondly, allow the child to complete the goal and set a specific time, for example, “Play for ten more minutes.” Sleep, okay?\” Let the child get rid of the suppressed spirit, and the free mind can thrive like the body. ② \”Pay attention to the \”order sensitive period\”\” After careful observation of children aged 0-6 years old, the author found that in the first two years after birth, children often cry unexpectedly, and the comfort of adults does not help them; those The most enjoyable thing for 3-4 year old children is to put small things back where they should be placed. On the contrary, if the items are placed in a messy and disorderly manner, they will cry and become restless. Why is this? It turns out that they have entered the order-sensitive period – during this period, what the child needs is the feeling that he can easily find familiar things even with his eyes closed. Living in this orderly environment, they will feel calm and happy. . So how to recognize that a child\’s behavior is in this order-sensitive period? It can be distinguished from several aspects such as place, location, space, time, sequence, possessions, conventions, habits, etc. For example, at the dining table, the child insists on asking the adults to sit in the same order as before. This is a \”sequential\” requirement for external order; the newly arrived children\’s bed has one less guardrail than the previous one, and the child keeps crying because of this. right\”\”Habits\” requirements… Therefore, it is best to keep the daily necessities at home in an orderly manner, and at the same time, do not make too many changes to the environment where the children live, such as frequently changing beds, rooms, caregivers, etc. for the children. ③『Get Understand the purpose of \”destroying\”. In real life, we will be surprised to find that once children get the things they desire, they will throw away or destroy these things. It seems that children\’s possessiveness and destructiveness go hand in hand. . This kind of nonsensical \”prank\” often puzzles us. Can we discover the inner beauty of children and not be limited to possessing the objects themselves? Taking the protection of flowers, plants and insects as an example, a common practice among adults is to scold children. , let them love and care for them instead of destroying them, but the effect is very little. The smart way is to introduce the names of plants or insects to their children, their growth process and the differences from similar ones, focus their interests on the wonderful things in nature, and guide them Carefully observe a plant or insect instead of destroying or injuring it – what the child needs is not the object itself, but an in-depth understanding of the object. Understanding the child\’s behavior and guiding it at critical moments can help the child develop and refine his or her mind so that it can Love the environment and life more, and successfully transition to the next stage of growth. ④ \”Distinguish between \”discipline\” and \”freedom\”\” In the classroom, a child approached the podium and wanted to imitate the teacher in putting the marker pen into the box. This kind of In this situation, our first thought is to say to the child: \”Don\’t make trouble, go back to your seat. \”If we insist on stopping and the child still disobeys the order, we usually label him as \”disrupting classroom order\”… Many times, we need to give children some rights to move freely, but unfortunately, many people do not distinguish Rights are taken away indiscriminately. Take the above example, the child just wants to express through this behavior that he is capable of doing this well. For teachers, this should be the best time to educate children – allow this The child imitates successfully and teaches that everything, including the child, must be placed in order; tell the children what behaviors they cannot do, such as not leaving their seats casually during class, not scribbling on the table with markers, etc. Etc. We should encourage children to explore more and do some beneficial and intellectually conscious activities. After all, their own efforts to develop their inner intelligence are the most precious. At the same time, tell children what the \”collectivism principle\” is. ——It is a beautiful thing to keep order with everyone, and it is good for everyone including him; learning to identify which behaviors are undesirable, such as any rude behavior, is discipline. To sum up, want to educate\” \”Unreasonable\” children, so that they can grow better physically and mentally. We need to understand the reasons behind children\’s behavior, respect their development needs, and let children stay away from oppression, move towards freedom, and have the courage to explore, so that they can form independent thoughts, personalities and souls. !