Yu Dan: To educate children, growth is more important than success

\”Education is actually a project to \’perfect people\’.\” At a forum that Zhongjiaojun recently participated in, Yu Dan, a professor at Beijing Normal University, a doctoral supervisor, and a famous cultural scholar, said: \”Although there are people selling various products every day. There are all kinds of \’success studies\’, but when it comes to growing children, I think growth is more important than success.\” \”What is growth? It is the bottom line of value. What is success? It is the icing on the cake that everyone pursues.\” Yu Dan said, \”Cultivating children to have a complete knowledge structure, a sound personality, and a scientific way of thinking will allow children to grow in an all-round way, instead of only focusing on standard answers and test scores.\” On the way to educating children, how to correctly View success and growth? Regardless of school or family, what is the most important thing to teach children? Let’s take a look at Teacher Yu Dan’s speech. It may bring you some inspiration. For growing children, growth is more important than success. Although the world is clamoring for successful learning every day, in the face of growing children, I want to say: growth is more important than success. What is the connection between growth and success? The basic meaning of success is goal achievement, which emphasizes results, while growth emphasizes process; success is an external social consideration, and growth is an internal life indicator; success sometimes requires a lot of external opportunities, which is It is episodic, but growth is lifelong, a state of mind and a state of mind. Today we emphasize too much on quick and successful learning, say too little on step-by-step growth, emphasize too much on the scale of human development, but not enough on rules. Regarding happiness education, we have made too many promises to children, but there is obviously insufficient education about suffering. There are too many ambitions and dreams to encourage children to achieve great things, but there is still not enough to do anything and build a bottom line of value. In response to this, I would like to talk to you about issues related to educational talents and society as a whole. The essence of education is to perfect people. In my opinion, the essence of education is to perfect people. It is to perfect and cultivate some people with sound personality, so that people can become human beings rather than becoming a certain kind of person. Today, everyone\’s professional knowledge has been so developed, but our common sense has been ignored. When taking public transportation, can people grab the steering wheel and hit the driver for their own needs? What does this society need? What we need is a tacit understanding of common sense and the bottom line of value. What is growth? It is the bottom line of value. What is success? It’s the icing on the cake that everyone is looking for. The so-called person with a sound personality should first have a complete knowledge structure. The complete knowledge structure here refers to common sense, a person\’s physical and mental health, a tacit adherence to public rules, and a scientific knowledge. Literacy, at least he will not be kidnapped by false propositions. A person who has artistic hobbies does not necessarily need to take exams, but when he is lonely and frustrated, he can comfort and soothe himself. This is called a complete knowledge structure. In addition, curiosity and a strong desire for knowledge are also necessary for growth. In my teaching career of more than 20 years, I have always insisted on teaching first-year undergraduate students because I want to give children some habits. I told them that in a middle school, the more standard answers in class, the higher your quality is; but in college, the fewer standard answers, everyone can express their own content, which is called a collective quality. Good schools encourage questioning, which will bring about a true sense of innovation and pioneering. Of course, the most challenging aspect of innovation is the courageous, fearless, and sincere ability to explore. What does education do? Education as a system gives society an encouraging personality direction, which is called growth. The first question is the development of a sound personality. What is personality? Heaven moves vigorously, and a gentleman strives for self-improvement. It talks about the entire movement of the sun and the moon. It can still do this without anyone supervising it, so a true gentleman must learn self-discipline. The terrain is uneven, and a gentleman should be virtuous. There are various species on the earth. People have their own different educational backgrounds and living environments. They need to be considerate and considerate of each other and forgive each other. Therefore, Tian Xingjian learns self-discipline from the sky, and Dishikun learns kindness from the earth. Be strict with yourself and be lenient with others. This person is said to be upright. The second problem is the scientific way of thinking. We always say that people have limitations, and if they can not be limited by thinking or controlled by patterns, they can truly step forward. Don\’t tell your children not to read any other books except for studying, and not to mind other things. In today\’s era, there is nothing that is not related to our lives. We should pay attention to cultivating children\’s life-repairing ability. Although all parents and teachers wish our children to live a pain-free life, we all know that when real pain comes, you cannot escape it, and the most important thing is To cultivate students’ life-restoring abilities. At the primary school level, we need to strengthen children\’s public welfare education. At the primary school level, we need to strengthen their public welfare education more, so that primary school students can take labor classes and volunteer classes just like Chinese classes and math classes. Tell your children that it’s not you who studies, everyone in the family must tolerate your temper and follow your schedule. As long as people are in this world, they must serve others. This is an ecological chain. The younger the children understand this, the better. It doesn\’t mean that you should support him first when he is in elementary school or middle school, and wait until he goes to college to let him understand this. That would be too late. How could you have a sense of dignity if you didn\’t pay for others when you were in elementary school? When children do things for others, and when adults thank a child, they all think of him as an adult and in an independent world. Therefore, primary schools should allocate time for volunteer classes, and children will also understand through personal experience that it is not easy for adults to make money. At the middle school stage, children must receive frustration education. In middle school, students must receive frustration education. Today’s media environment has made children’s age of competition earlier, the age of love earlier, and the age of all kinds of thinking earlier. His setbacks have already occurred in advance. Are you responsible for your child if you still don’t teach him how to deal with setbacks? To let children pay for their own actions, as a mature personality, people should be able to pay for themselves no matter what their actions are. Confucius once said, \”If you see many dangers, if you do the rest with caution, you will have few regrets.\” It means that in this world, a person’s real knowledge can be seen by watching what others do. If you have any doubts, ask firstIf you put it aside and don’t do it, do the other things you are sure of with caution, so you can reduce regrets. Confucius told his students, \”Do you want to become an official and make money?\” Let me tell you, if you have few words and few regrets, you will be rewarded. If you speak less and complain less and do things less regretfully, you will know how to be an official and a human being in society. Don\’t let your children always hold on to those false dreams and learn this bottom line. Even if you are so careful, people will still make mistakes. It doesn\’t matter if you make mistakes. Only when you make mistakes will you know whether you have the ability to pay for your actions. Duke Ai of Lu asked Confucius, \”You have so many students, who is a good scholar and who has learned clearly?\” Confucius said Yan Hui, why? He cited two attitudes of Yan Hui when he made mistakes. The first is not to express anger. My mistake is my responsibility. Not to express anger to others. Neither blame God nor others, and do not make any excuses. This is called not to express anger. The second is not to make mistakes twice. The same mistake will not be allowed in this life. If you make a mistake for the second time, don\’t make the same mistake next time. This is called paying for your own behavior. Secondly, I hope that every child will not always copy himself into an idol or make himself a pirated copy of others, but let everyone see the best version of themselves. And this best personality needs to be encouraged. Encouraging a child to discover himself is for him to learn self-discipline in the future. When a person is more self-disciplined and has self-esteem, the degree of freedom in society will be correspondingly higher. What if you don’t have self-discipline? Others always point fingers at you. This is heteronomy. If heteronomy does not apply, there is still law. Whether you give up self-discipline and other disciplines until the law deprives you of your freedom, or strengthen self-discipline, improve self-esteem, and win freedom, everyone can decide for themselves. Family education should start with behavioral modeling to tell children that learning is not everything, and learning is for your own good. The whole family cannot be indebted to you just because you have learned. There is a saying that third-rate parents serve as nannies, second-rate parents serve as coaches, and first-rate parents serve as role models. What does it mean to be a first-class parent as a role model? Parents have their own work, and children have their own studies. Everyone does their own thing. Parents should tell their children that my work does not trouble you, so I will not worry too much about your studies. You are at school. If you have any grievances, it\’s your interpersonal relationships. I won\’t find a teacher for you. I will also handle my interpersonal relationships well. This is called a role model. Being a role model does not necessarily mean spending all your time or even sacrificing yourself to accompany your children. Here I would like to tell you about the tutoring traditions of several families that have been passed down for generations in the past. Let’s start with Mr. Zeng Guofan’s family motto. When people are young, the most unbearable thing is good times; in middle age, what people can\’t stand is leisure times; but in old age, they are most afraid of adversity. Think about it, when you were young, you had everything going smoothly, and the whole world used you. This child has no personality experience, and in middle age, he is idle. In fact, being busy is also a qualification, which shows that you are valuable. If a person does not accumulate resources because of being busy in middle age, then having too much money as a teenager will be a great misfortune in life. This matter should be told to both students and parents. Don’t always say that no matter how hard it is, you can’t hurt your children. There is a certain amount of hardship that a person will endure in his life. If a child doesn’t endure hardship now, should he be allowed to endure hardship when he is old? Mr. Zeng Guofan said, I wonder if a wealthy family will decline in the future., only look at three things about his children: first, whether they get up early every day; second, whether they can do housework; third, whether they love to read. People can get up early, which is a covenant between heaven and earth. It is for self-cultivation, doing housework is for the family, and studying is a person\’s wisdom. Such people are promising. People often say that my children may not be able to get up early to work, but they definitely read a lot. But are our children really readers? Some of today\’s children study for exams, not because they really like studying. We actually have a very simple criterion for evaluating whether today\’s children are scholars. If you regard reading as a way of learning, you cannot be said to be a scholar. Only a person who regards reading as a way of life can be called a true scholar. Therefore, only if a child regards reading as a kind of leisure pleasure can he become connected with books. So how can we make children fall in love with reading? I think children should be allowed to read leisure books, all virtual and real, art and philosophy, all without boundaries. Encouraging children to love reading is better than not reading at all. Liu Changming, the principal of Beijing No. 4 Central Plains, once said that you should be an educator who can rub dirt out of your eyes. When it comes to your children\’s growth, you must be able to tolerate sand in your eyes. You have to be parents and teachers who can rub the dirt in their eyes. These are not only tutors, but also the purpose of school education. Let’s talk about Lin Zexu’s family motto. He particularly emphasized the vision, the sea is open to all rivers, tolerance is great, the wall stands thousands of feet high, and the absence of desire is strong. He will teach his children to see the sky and the earth and see all living beings. They will not know how big the sky is unless they climb high mountains, and they will not know how thick the earth is unless they go to deep valleys. Lin Zexu\’s family is very promising, because he does not leave any money to them. Lin Zexu said that if my descendants are like me, why should I leave money for them? They are originally very virtuous and have ambitions. Too much money will harm their aspirations; I If your descendants are not as good as me, why should I keep money? Being stupid and rich will only increase your faults. As teachers, parents, and basic education people, the greatest wealth we can bring to our children is lifelong habits. If we let him know that he must learn to rely on himself, he will be taught endless lessons throughout his life. Everyone is familiar with \”Young China Theory\”, which was left by Mr. Liang Qichao. Liang Qichao\’s family was very powerful, with three academicians in one subject and nine sons all talented. The nine children in their family are all promising, and their majors are not the same. They are not repeating the father, but letting the child be themselves. Mr. Liang Qichao said not to engage in cramming education. He advocated that parents should be friends with their children. He wrote more than 500 letters home to his nine children. He said that parents must be interesting so that the children they raise can be interesting. Teachers and parents can think about this sentence, are we interesting people? Mr. Liang Qichao also said that a clear and strong outlook on life is the first key to staying optimistic. This is a family motto and a value. I think education is about giving oneself faith in culture, and then using this faith to educate others. Once our minds are settled, there will be no chaos in the future. If we give students some non-standard answers, the world will not kidnap everyone’s judgment. Teachers communicate with parents, and a stable value judgment is formed between home and school. Our children will have a final harbor, which can help them grow and be the best choice for the world.The greatest merit.