Are children nowadays becoming more and more difficult to manage? It\’s because you didn\’t do these things right before you were 6 years old

Many parents will find that when they were young, they could not love their children enough. However, as the children grow up, the children show less and less respect for their parents. So we often feel frustrated: Why are our children becoming more and more difficult to manage? What step did we make wrong? In 1964, the first episode of the documentary series \”Seven Years in the Life\”, \”7 Up\”, had the following subtitles at the beginning: \”Let me take care of a child until he is seven years old. From now on, you can take care of him as you wish, and let him grow up as he pleases, and whatever he will become.\” People are destined.\” During childhood, family can often influence a child\’s life. The period from 0 to 6 years old can be said to be the most important stage in a child\’s life. It is a critical period for the development and formation of a child\’s personality, living habits, and values. During this period, if you don’t do some things right, it will be difficult to manage your children well in the future. After your child is 3 years old, you should have the courage to say \”no\” to him. If 0-3 years old is a critical period for a child to establish a sense of security, no amount of love is too much for your child. But after the age of three, you have to learn To reject the child. Generally speaking, children after the age of 3 often cry with some special purpose. They may even start to look at their parents\’ colors and test their parents\’ bottom line. For example, if you want to eat snacks, play with your mobile phone, or buy toys, your child will cry loudly, roll around, and behave badly. If your parents insist on giving in, your child will use the same method to make you compromise next time. As he grows up, he wants more and more things, and there are more and more ways to force his parents to compromise. Therefore, there is no room for any discussion on issues of principle when it comes to children’s growth. A memo to parents from an American school: Don’t spoil me. I know very well that I don\’t deserve everything I ask for, and I\’m just testing you with my unreasonable demands. Don\’t be afraid to be fair to me. It makes me feel safe. Don\’t let me develop bad habits. When I was young, I had to rely on you to tell me what was right and wrong. Saying \”no\” to your children may be difficult at first, but if you don\’t do it, it is the most irresponsible education. Good living habits should be developed before children are 6 years old. The ancient Greek philosopher Thales once said: \”What is the easiest thing to do? It is easiest to give advice to others; what is the most difficult thing to do? Managing yourself is the most difficult.\” However, management The key to taking care of yourself is to develop some good habits. 0 to 6 years old is a critical period for children to develop habits. A kindergarten teacher once said to me: The most important thing for children in kindergarten is to develop good habits. For example, reading, doing your own things, paying attention to hygiene, etc. If the child does not develop these good habits during this period, in the future you may have to make more efforts if you want your child to read more books, pay more attention to hygiene, participate in more sports activities, and work and rest on time… My colleague’s daughter is 6 years old. From eating and sleeping to putting on clothes and shoes, adults need to worry about everything. A colleague discovered that her daughter had too many bad habits. For example, her dolls were scattered all over the floor but she didn’t know how to put them away. When completing the tasks assigned by the kindergarten teacher, she looked around and was particularly inattentive. She also watched TV while eating. While grandparents were feeding them… and tracing back to the source of these bad habits, it wasThe indulgence of adults. It\’s not easy to develop a good habit, and it\’s even harder to quit a bad habit. Therefore, before the child is 6 years old, do not ignore those little habits in life. They may become the basis for the child to adapt to future life. A good parent-child relationship is more important than a good education. A few days ago, I was chatting with some old friends. One of them mentioned that his child is about to enter junior high school, but he is becoming more and more disobedient and likes to do the opposite of his parents. The relationship between father and son is also bad. Very stiff. After getting to know the child, I realized that when the child was very young, a friend and his wife went out to do business and spent very little time with the child, leaving the child to be taken care of by the elderly. Every time my friend comes home, he will find a lot of behavioral problems in his child, but before even saying a few words, the child will get angry. I said to him: \”The biggest problem between you and your child is a poor parent-child relationship.\” There are many parents around us who pay too much attention to their children\’s education, but forget to maintain a good relationship with their children, and do not have enough relationship with their children. As a result, education seems particularly difficult. What does poor parent-child relationship mean? It means that there is a lack of loving connection between you and your child. Without this connection, you cannot touch the child\’s heart, and your education cannot be effective. Moreover, in a bad parent-child relationship, excessive education will cause children to have rebellious psychology. Therefore, the first thing parents should do when their children are young is to spend more time with their children and establish high-quality emotional connections with them. With a good relationship as a foundation, there is no need to keep telling children what they should do and what they should not do. Children will naturally be willing to trust their parents. In a close, natural and warm family relationship, the chance of a child turning into a bear will be much smaller. Demonstration is more effective than preaching before the age of 6. From the time children are born, the first person they come into contact with and recognize is their parents. Therefore, when they understand and explore the world, they imitate and learn from their parents. For example, when some children learn to speak, they will imitate their parents\’ pronunciation, tone, and word choice. One day you accidentally say a curse word, and a few days later you will find that this sentence actually came out of the child\’s mouth. For example, when a girl sees her mother wearing high heels, she wants to try them on, and when a boy sees his father driving a car, he will also want to grab the steering wheel. The famous social psychologist Bandura discovered through experiments that children learn by observing role models and imitating them. It can be said that children\’s habits and virtues can more or less be seen from their parents. Therefore, although the children in this period are young, parents must set a good example in front of their children. If you want your children to learn to say hello, you should take the initiative to say hello more often; if you want your children to read more, then put down your mobile phone and pick up a book; if you want your children to love sports, you must not stay at home all the time… Teaching by example is always better than words, you want your children The best way to become what kind of person you are is to first become that person yourself.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *