Treating indulgence as \”waiting for the flowers to bloom\” is the biggest lie in education

\”Free-range education\” is ruining children. Backstage today, I received a message from a fifth-grade parent: My daughter is in fifth grade this year. She has always been envious of those children who are good at singing, dancing, and outgoing and lively. She once had this opportunity. When she was 4 years old, I sent her to a dance class. But she couldn\’t stand the pain when pressing her legs and the monotony of learning skills day after day, so she begged me not to send her to dance anymore. I felt sorry for my daughter, so I agreed, and she has never been to a dance class since. Now, she regrets it and once jokingly complained to me: \”Mom, if you had persisted a little longer, maybe I would have become more versatile. If you had been more strict, maybe I would have…\” After reading this story, I personally feel that , what I regret most is not my daughter, but this mother. It is perfectly normal for a 4-year-old child to shrink back when faced with difficulties. If the mother can guide and encourage the child at this time, maybe he can persevere. In recent years, many Chinese parents have begun to imitate foreign \”free-range education.\” Live peacefully every day and \”respect\” your children everywhere. But what is the result of doing so? The child is good at nothing and the parents regret it. Mr. Cai Kangyong said something that I very much agree with: \”When you are 5 years old, you find swimming difficult, so you give up swimming. When you are 18, you meet someone you like and asks you to go swimming, and you have no choice but to say; When you are 18, you find English difficult, so you give up English. At 28, If a great job comes up but requires you to speak English, you have to say, \’I don\’t know that.\’\” The reality is so cruel, if there is no effort, there will be no gain. Don\’t wait until your child misses an opportunity and ask you in turn: \”Why didn\’t you force me?\” Without certain rules and good habits, \”free-range\” is just a kind of blind \”indulgence\”, which will ultimately lead to failure. Become an excellent child. Treating letting things go as waiting for the flowers to bloom is the biggest lie in education. The true free-range education frees up children\’s thinking and cultivates children\’s habits. Only in this way can the children benefit. What are the 26 episodes of the super nice Chinese historical story of 5,000 years in mp3? Never expect children to be \”conscious\” on the road to education. The reason why children are children is that they lack self-consciousness. Others cannot really build up his self-awareness. Good kids are all in charge, and naughty kids are spoiled. On the road to education, parents should never simply expect their children to be \”conscious\”. Liu Huan\’s status in the music world is undoubted, and he is definitely a \”grand\” figure in the music field, but when it comes to educating his daughter, he is a little helpless. Liu Huanhe and his wife have always advocated \”happy education\” and \”free-range education\” in the process of educating their children, respecting any ideas of their children and not forcing their children to do things they don\’t want to do. But during an interview, Liu Huan said that she now \”regrets it.\” Liu Huan\’s daughter is actually a very talented person in music. She also liked to play with some instruments and play the piano when she was a child, but she was unwilling to practice the piano. At that time, Liu Huan and his wife felt that their child did not want to practice, so they did not force it. Now seeing that others around them are versatile, they can\’t help but regret it: \”I feel a bit regretful that I did not force her to learn music since she was a child.In fact, if you force her to practice, she may become very good. Children who are talented in this area can still be pushed. ” But there is never such a thing as “if” in the world, and children’s growth cannot be repeated. Laziness is human nature, and children are no exception. Parents must understand: expecting children to be self-conscious is the most powerless education; Falling in love with learning and learning to learn are the most difficult wishes to realize. 99% of children need education from their parents! Just \”I\’ll go home and ask the child whether he likes it, whether he wants to go to school, or whether he\’s going to school or not.\” \”Opinions\”. If the child doesn\’t like it, doesn\’t it mean he doesn\’t have to learn anything? That would really harm the child. In the past, I also thought that the child should be left alone so that she would have more freedom to do what she wanted. What I want to do. However, later I gradually discovered that it is a long process to educate an excellent and highly conscious child. In the early stage of developing self-discipline and self-consciousness, children rely on parental supervision. Only parents invest a lot Only by spending time and energy to educate and restrain children can we cultivate outstanding children. Excellent children cannot do without the hard work of their parents. Dong Qing has always been praised by netizens for his elegant conversation and appearance, \”his temperament is as beautiful as an orchid, and his talent is beyond comparison.\” \”Immortal\”. With the popularity of \”Chinese Poetry Conference\” and \”The Reader\”, Dong Qing has already become the \”national goddess\”. Now her identity has also evolved from an early host to today\’s TV producer. About Dong Qing , many netizens are curious: How can we cultivate such an outstanding girl? In fact, the education she received in childhood is different from the \”free-range education\” that many people believe in now. When Dong Qing was a child, her parents were very strict with her . As soon as I started to learn to read, I was urged to copy poems and idioms and recite them every day. That’s why I was admitted to junior high school because of my excellent grades after four years of primary school. When I entered middle school, my father’s requirements became even higher. Not only did she make a book list and clearly required her to read how many classics she had to read, but she also had to excerpt wonderful sentences. Her father would check these homework every day. During the interview, Dong Qing also admitted that when she was young, she disliked her father\’s strictness. , was so sad that she wanted to cry, but now she is very grateful. Mo Yan said that the excellence of children is soaked in the sweat of their parents. Life is a process of conquering demons and cultivating righteousness all the way, and parents are the living bodhisattvas of their children, who can help them They opened roads over mountains, built bridges over rivers, and achieved great success. Yes, nothing comes out of nowhere. Behind every outstanding child is the hard work of his parents. When you envy other people\’s children for their good compositions , but you don’t know that the parents behind them have started reading together with their children as early as how old they are. Fluent language expression is the result of hundreds of children’s books. When you envy other people’s children who don’t have to worry about learning, you don’t know that the parents behind them want to How much effort has been put into cultivating children\’s good study habits; when you envy other people\’s children for their proficiency in music, chess, calligraphy and painting, you don\’t know how many times the parents behind you have picked them up and dropped them off, rain or shine, and how many nights they have held back their temper and patiently practiced with them… Education also requires parents’ dedication and efforts. We often say that we need to give our children plenty of love, soMany parents will be very obedient to their children, asking for stars but not the moon. But in fact, this is not good for the growth of children. If you don\’t force your child, he will only indulge himself more and more. Although children may dislike parents\’ strictness, when they grow up, they will appreciate this strictness and urge them to become better people. The best education is a combination of strictness and leniency. Parents should give their children freedom, but this freedom is not unlimited, rule-less, or uncontrolled, nor is it indulgence or inaction. Education scholar Ding Lin once told a story: An American guest, a third-grade girl, came to her home. Like all children, the little girl has no resistance to candies. After finishing the first one, she still wants to eat the second one. She asked her mother if it was okay. Mom said clearly, no. The little girl had no choice but to accept it calmly. Many people like to talk about how free and advanced foreign education is, and how respectful it is of children\’s wishes, but they have overlooked one point: in front of freedom, there is a clearly visible boundary that marks some things that can be done and some things that cannot be done. Do. There is nothing wrong with a certain amount of release and tolerance, but before release, there must be a clear boundary. Some things can be tolerated, but some boundaries must not be crossed. Educating children to control with principles is much more difficult than letting go without principles. Behind this, the guidance of parents at key points, the long-term value environment created, and the influence of a thousand pounds are truly a test of parents\’ skills. When you see other people’s children being good enough, please believe it because other people’s parents have put in enough effort. Blind free-range education is the easiest for parents who are unwilling to maintain their own learning ability and improve their own education methods. But if you want to raise a child with upright views and healthy mental health, you need parents to invest a lot of time, energy and high-quality companionship in their children. The true free-range education frees up children\’s thinking and cultivates children\’s habits.