How to raise a mentally strong child

Brain scientist Professor Hong Lan said: The brain can be changed by language, and it will continue to change the distribution of nerves due to external demands. Parents\’ language shapes children differently. If you want to cultivate mentally strong children, you not only need parents\’ education methods, but also need parents to pay attention to the way they usually speak. Parents regard these four sentences as mantras, and within three months, their children will transform and become mentally strong children. The first sentence \”Baby, I need you\” – Cultivate a sense of responsibility. Contrary to this sentence, in our parent-child relationship, it is often \”Mom, I need you.\” The strong status and strong desire of control of parents firmly bind their children Hold it firmly in your hand. Children grow up under the protection of their parents, like flowers in a greenhouse, which cannot withstand the slightest baptism of wind and rain. These children are highly dependent, weak at heart, have no ideas in doing things, and have poor independence. They can easily become \”Mama\’s boys\” and \”Mama\’s girls.\” At this point, Hu Ke and Huo Siyan are very smart. They always send the signal \”Baby, I need you\” to their son. Hu Ke\’s show of weakness allowed his eldest son Anji to take the initiative to take care of his younger brother and help him do housework, becoming a responsible little man. Huo Siyan\’s show of weakness made Uhm become a warm boy, always thinking about how to take care of his mother. When parents show weakness, they give their children a chance to grow. \”Baby, I need you\”, this sentence gives children the greatest encouragement and cultivates their sense of responsibility. Children know more about independence and self-reliance, and are more caring and grateful to their parents. The second sentence \”Baby, you make the decision\” – Cultivate a sense of autonomy. In 2018, \”China Youth Daily\” conducted a survey of 2014 respondents. The results showed that: 34.8% of the respondents said that their parents take care of personal matters for their children. Affairs will continue until the children go to college; 23.5% of the respondents said that their parents will continue until the children go to middle school; 18.0% will continue until the children work and start a family; 15.0% will continue to exist; 5.4% will continue until the children go to graduate school. And only 3.4% continue until their children go to elementary school! A friend is a primary school teacher. She told me that many children have no autonomy. They don’t pay attention to things, can’t make decisions, don’t know anything about anything, and have no idea how to study every day. At first glance, they look like “little flowers” ​​who are used to being taken care of by their parents. . Arrangement is to dig holes in the way of children\’s growth. When children grow up, they have no chance to try or make mistakes. They are used to reaching out for clothes and opening their mouths for food. Their studies are decided by their parents, and their lives are determined by their parents. They grow up to be puppets with no hollow strings, and everything is decided by others. Professor Li Meijin once pointed out: \”Life is the child\’s own, and parents should provide guidance instead of making decisions for their children.\” The sooner parents let go, the sooner children will become independent, and the sooner parents delegate power, the sooner children will mature. Only by allowing children to experience, distinguish, and think on their own can they truly think about their own lives and know how to work hard. The third sentence \”Baby, you are doing better than mom\” – to improve self-confidence. A primary school teacher praised the children in the class: \”You are the best class.\” \”Look, how standard you are sitting. , voiceHow loud. \”You guys are amazing.\” \”Immediately afterwards, something magical happened. The children sat in standard postures, focused in class, and answered questions with a particularly loud voice. The children\’s self-confidence and self-esteem were formed in such \”rainbow farts\”. The famous psychologist Alfred Reid Said: Encouragement and praise are more important than any aspect in the process of raising children. Almost all the reasons for children\’s inappropriate behavior can be considered as the lack of appropriate encouragement and praise. A child who behaves inappropriately is a child who has not been encouraged. Children who grow up under \”suppressive education\” are timid and have no self-confidence, while children under \”encouragement education\” are full of self-confidence. They do not give up easily and always have the motivation to move forward when doing things. Parents can Praise your children more often in life: \”The dishes you wash are cleaner than mom! \”You have thought of all the details that my mother has not thought of. You have thought too comprehensively!\” \”Speaking parents can raise children who are sunny and confident. Can they not be strong when they grow up? The fourth sentence \”Baby, it\’s okay\” – cultivating a sense of security. A 9-year-old boy, just because he broke the glass in the school, will not be strong when he grows up? He dared to tell his parents and was afraid of being punished, so he left a suicide note and jumped off the building to commit suicide. A little thing can be the straw that breaks the camel\’s back. Why are children so fragile? \”100 Details of Positive Discipline of Boys\” says: In this world, everyone is likely to make mistakes for various reasons. No matter what the mistake is, the most important thing is to let the children have the courage to take responsibility. Behind any child who does not have courage, there must be a parent who likes to complain and blame. Scolding makes children feel fearful and insecure. They are always trembling with fear, and will be frightened by the slightest disturbance. Parents’ love, support and encouragement are their children’s strongest backing and their courage and motivation to explore the world. , is the confidence to get up and move forward even if you encounter setbacks. There is a saying in \”The Little Prince\” that the most conquering weapon in the world is language. One sentence can make a person\’s mood fall to the bottom. Let a person regain his strength. \”Every child is dancing on the tip of his parents\’ tongue. \”Being irritable, complaining, scolding, and scolding will only bring harm to the child one after another, and eventually force the child into a timid and cowardly state. If we want to raise children with strong hearts, we must do \”be able to speak, Parents with high emotional intelligence. If you use another way to communicate with your children, you will have unexpected gains. Click \”Like\” and encourage all parents.