10 ways to spend quality time with your baby

Because I am interested in the topic of \”big data\”, I went back to Columbia to take two courses this semester. I went back to school one day a week, leaving early and coming back late. During the day, my grandma helped me take care of my baby. So I changed from a full-time mother who stayed with my child seven days a week to a \”mini-part-time mother\”, and I also experienced the life of a working mother. My mother-in-law is a competent helper, and I don\’t worry about my child\’s diet and sleep. Taking a break from being a stay-at-home mom and entering a new environment to learn new things is also a great way for me to relieve stress. But I am still a little anxious, fearing that the reduced time spent with my baby will affect the parent-child relationship. Then I occasionally read a very interesting research report, which found that if mothers excessively sacrifice their own time to accompany their children, it will cause greater emotional stress and may have a negative effect on the growth of their children. Therefore, companionship is not about the length of time, but the right method of companionship is the key. For working mothers, there are about three hours in the morning and evening every day, which is the golden time to spend time with their babies and establish a close relationship. Time is so limited, how can we accompany you so that we can achieve quality? I summarized some of my experiences on spending quality time with my baby, divided into four parts: before going out early, after returning home late, before going to bed, and on weekends. Before going out early: 1. Stay in bed for five minutes. Every morning I will stay in bed with Su Baolai. When the baby was just born, I put a small Bluetooth speaker in her bedroom. After the baby woke up, I would lie with her in the early morning sunshine, listen to music, hum a few children\’s songs, and squeeze her little hands and feet. tickling his belly. Sometimes I would hide my head in the quilt and play hide and seek with her, making her laugh. Su Bao\’s heartfelt laughter was particularly penetrating, and the air in the whole house was filled with happiness in the early morning. I really like to \”waste time\” with her like this. Although it only takes about five minutes every morning, it can make both the baby and the adults start each day in a happy mood. 2. If possible, have breakfast together. Working mothers are often in a hurry when they go out in the morning. Sometimes they don’t even have time to eat breakfast themselves, let alone eat it with their children. But I still strongly recommend that if you can spare time, have breakfast with your baby. Dad Su also goes to work very early every day. Before going out, we usually have a simple breakfast, such as black rice porridge soaked the night before; soy milk + frozen soup dumplings bought in the supermarket; toast + milk and eggs; Waffles + fresh fruit are all quick combinations that take less than 15 minutes to prepare. A table of meals is like a home. Sharing a breakfast face to face with loved ones is particularly conducive to cultivating intimate relationships. In the same way, having dinner together can also achieve the effect of high-quality companionship. After returning home late: 3. Take your children for a walk. Many communities have recreational facilities for children. After Su\’s father gets off work, I usually cook, and he takes the baby to the park near our home for a walk, playing on the slide and swinging. On the way from home to the park, he would use a sports stroller to push his baby and run there, which could be considered as using the spare time to exercise. Some people (especially fathers) have a misunderstanding of the word \”accompanying their children\”. When I go to the park, I sometimes see parents looking at their mobile phones while spending time with their children, absent-mindedly. When you are sitting in front of your child and playing with your mobile phone, please don’t tell me that you are spending time with your child.Just pretending to have a child. No matter how busy you are at work during the day, your role in front of your baby is just that of a parent. When spending time with your baby, you need to take off your shirt, turn off your phone, change your role, and devote yourself wholeheartedly. Besides, is giving likes to your colleagues’ WeChat circles really more important than your children? 4. Dressing and bathing can also be used to accompany and take care of the baby. There are many seemingly boring little things, but they can actually be used as opportunities for high-quality companionship. For example, when I dress Su Bao every morning, I will count the buttons on her clothes together, or sing nursery rhymes with her while dressing her: little arms, put on sleeves, put on clothes, button on little feet, put on pants, put on When she was putting on shoes and cutting her nails, we would sing a nursery rhyme about the five fingers to teach her to recognize her own fingers. Brushing teeth, combing hair, and bathing all have corresponding nursery rhymes and games, and they can all become part of high-quality companionship. The difference lies in whether you are taking care of your baby\’s daily life in a \”task completion\” style, or whether you are taking care of your baby in a fun way Go through these little things. Before going to bed: 5. Read picture books. If you can only choose one method in today’s article, choose parent-child reading. Reading picture books with your baby is the best high-quality way I can think of. Many benefits of parent-child reading have been written in past articles. The companionship is for both parties, and the benefits are also for both parties. Psychologists have confirmed that parent-child reading is not only beneficial to the baby\’s cognitive development, but also promotes the emotional development of parents and children, and is also beneficial to the parents\’ own psychological state. The working mothers around me usually read picture books at night before their babies go to bed. This time is more realistic and can also become part of the baby\’s bedtime routine to help him develop a good routine. 6. Touch before going to bed. When we were pregnant, we went to the birth preparation class, and the doctor told us that touching and massaging is particularly beneficial to the neurological development and character development of the newborn baby. So since Su Bao was born, Su’s father and I would give her a simple massage before going to bed after taking a bath every day. The method is to choose a time when the baby is more comfortable and not hungry. After rubbing the baby oil in the palm of your hands to warm it, start from the face and gently massage the baby\’s limbs and body. In fact, touching is not limited to newborn babies, young children can also enjoy massage. Su Bao is now almost two years old, and we still maintain the habit of rubbing her little hands and feet with baby oil before going to bed. It is a way to relax the baby and is also a good way to convey love and connect with each other. 7. Doing nothing, just hugging and enjoying high-quality companionship must mean you are doing something. In fact, it is not the case. From the time Su Bao was born to now, we have about 10 minutes of \”cuddle time\” almost every evening. Whenever I am going out for a whole day, the first thing I do with Su Bao when I get home is not to tell stories or sing nursery rhymes, but to hug her. We will find a quiet corner to sit down, sometimes listening to some soothing music, sometimes we don’t need to listen to anything, we just hold the baby in our arms and let time freeze for a while. \”Cuddle time\” = spending time with your baby in a daze. It is an exclusive moment that no one can interrupt. It is also the most quiet and warm moment for us every day. Weekends: 8. Family mini-trips Weekends are a great opportunity to build parent-child bonding. Although everySporadic companionship during the day is important, but if you can spend half a day or a whole day with your baby on weekends, you can go hiking and have a picnic. Day trips are very popular among American families, especially when the baby is still young and cannot travel far away, the whole family often takes a day trip. When traveling, seeing different scenery, experiencing new environments, and having high-quality companionship are a kind of benign stimulation to the baby\’s brain. 9. Let the baby participate in daily tasks such as grocery shopping and cooking. On weekends, we usually go to the supermarket to buy groceries together and teach the baby to recognize the items in the supermarket while shopping. After I came back, the whole family would cook together, and I would also ask Su Bao to help me while cooking. For example, I would give her some vegetable leaves and ask her to help me \”select vegetables,\” or ask her to help me stir the ingredients for baking muffin cakes. Full sense of participation. Our secret to making these little things fun is to make them full of \”rituals.\” For example, when we are going to buy groceries, I will let Su Bao choose a stuffed toy that she likes, and then we will go shopping with the toy. If you don’t like cooking, you can also try ordering takeout on weekends and save time to do other interesting things with your children. 10. Parent-child games: Playing in a child’s way is a great way to spend time with your children. If you have a baby at home, you can play with building blocks and touch sensory boards (Su’s mother will include some links to parent-child games at the end of today’s article). Older babies can do handcrafts, graffiti, knead plasticine, and play with their parents. Board games, role play, house, etc. Companionship is not necessarily about teaching children anything. While playing, let your baby be the master of the game, and even let him teach you how to play. Your role is to assist and listen. There are many ways to provide high-quality companionship. These suggestions today are just a starting point. I believe everyone has many good ideas. If you are very busy today and your baby is already asleep when you get home, there is no need to be anxious. Occasional absences will not have a long-term impact on the baby. Parents have a relaxed attitude and focus on accompanying them when they are free, which is better than spending all the time with them. How much time is more important. \”Looking at\” children is passive, while \”accompanying\” children is active and two-way. Watching a child is not just about sitting there and \”watching\”, but interacting with her and participating in her life. There is no need to worry about how much time you spend \”looking after your children\”. What you should really pay attention to is how much time you spend \”seeing\” your children every day.