It was well known that Meili and her mother-in-law got along well. In the community, when an old man meets Meili\’s mother-in-law, he always says, \”Your daughter-in-law is nice. She always says good things about you. You are really lucky. My daughter-in-law always says bad things about me when she meets people.\” Young mothers tell Mei Li Li said: \”Your mother-in-law looks very qualified. I really envy you.\” Meili works as a full-time mother at home. Her husband earns an average income. Her mother-in-law is almost 70 and her retirement salary is relatively high. Since the birth of her son Tutu, her mother-in-law has paid a monthly salary of They all gave Meili a living allowance. My mother-in-law has a better personality, she doesn\’t gossip, and she cares about Meili. She never accuses Meili of spending money, let alone accuses her of having no income. This is also a prerequisite for the harmonious relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. But there are always some living habits between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law that they can\’t adapt to. These little habits don\’t hurt your muscles and bones, but they happen every moment of every day, right next to your body, next to your hands, and under your eyes. If it is not resolved in time and allowed to accumulate over time, the gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will become wider and wider. So what did Mellie do? When washing clothes, my mother-in-law always puts all the underwear, socks, shirts and outer pants in the washing machine and washes them together, including baby Tutu\’s clothes. Meili communicated with her mother-in-law several times about this, but her mother-in-law could persist for up to three days after hearing this, and it was still the same after that. Meili also knew that it was very difficult for the elderly to change their habits, and she would feel annoyed if she had to tell them several times. So she got up earlier every morning and washed her children\’s clothes and her own underwear by hand. If she needs to use a washing machine, she will mix a little bit of 84 with Dettol disinfectant in advance and add it to the washing machine for idling disinfection. After doing this a few times, my mother-in-law would occasionally remember to take out her underwear and socks and wash them separately. Meili said: This is progress. If one person gives in a little bit and sees the other person\’s efforts more, life will get better and better. Picking Teeth with Chopsticks My mother-in-law had a habit of sucking all the soup from the chopsticks when eating. Therefore, the chopsticks were inserted deeper into her mouth. Meili always felt that her chopsticks were covered with saliva. My mother-in-law’s teeth were bad, and most of them were lost. When she got dentures, they were cheap. The dentures she chose were a little higher than her real teeth, and the gaps were uneven, which made it easy for food to get stuck in the gaps between her teeth. And her mother-in-law was accustomed to using chopsticks as toothpicks to pick out the residue from between her teeth… When her mother-in-law used these chopsticks to dig deep into the soup bowl to scoop out vegetables, Meili felt \”everything was bad.\” My mother-in-law also likes to stir the dishes on the plate. Her original intention may be to make the seasoning more even. For example, to make every piece of braised pork covered with juice, she would pick up each piece of meat with chopsticks from time to time and turn it over. When they first got along, Meili was pregnant. At that time, she felt that eating every day was like fighting a war. She would only eat a few dishes in front of her, and follow her mother\’s instructions when she was young to \”only eat her own corner\” to eat quickly. After having Tutu, Meili had to feed the child before eating. She was very distressed about this. She didn\’t dare to drink soup and was careful when eating vegetables. And she couldn\’t tell her mother-in-law about this matter anyway, not to mention that the old man might not be able to change it. Meili occasionally complains to her husband, but her husband says that Meili is pretentious. Later MeiliThen she found a way: before each meal, she would serve herself a small bowl of soup, euphemistically calling it \”for fear of burning it\”. She would also serve her own rice first, put a few chopsticks and vegetables into the rice bowl, and pretend to be hungry. , take a bite first, and then feed Tutu. In this way, when Tutu comes to eat after feeding her, at least there will be food in the bowl that she can eat \”with confidence\”. If there is no soup on the plate, she will just eat it. Meili said that it wasn’t really that she had mysophobia, but that she just couldn’t get used to this habit. But she understood that her mother-in-law did not mean to do this, but it was just a lifelong habit that is hard to change. \”What old man doesn\’t have some bad habits? It would be the same with my mother.\” Her mother-in-law, who is greedy for cheap shopping, likes to go to the supermarket, and especially likes to read posters and various products. information on discounts and promotions. For example, when she sees the \”buy two get one free\” offer on soy sauce, it\’s a good deal. She might buy two sets, so she suddenly has 6 bottles of soy sauce at home. The next time she goes there and sees a price reduction on another brand of soy sauce, she might buy another bottle. The soy sauce mentioned here is just an example. In addition to oil, salt, soy sauce and vinegar, there are also daily necessities, such as toothpaste, shampoo, shower gel, etc. The end result is that there are always some things at home that expire before they are opened and have to be thrown away. My mother-in-law likes to go to a wholesale market near her home to buy vegetables. The vegetables there are much cheaper than elsewhere, and she especially likes to buy vegetables in large quantities. For example, green vegetables cost 3 yuan per catty, 5 yuan for two catties, and 7 yuan for three catties. My mother-in-law often bought three kilograms of green vegetables, a large bag of potatoes, and even five heads of Chinese cabbage. Finally, if the cabbage leaves turn black, throw them away! If the green leaves turn yellow, throw them away! If the potatoes sprout, throw them away! The refrigerator was always full, and Meili joked that if there was an outbreak of zombies in the city, their family would probably be the last one to survive. In response to this problem, Meili first told her mother-in-law that it was not cost-effective. She said that it would be more expensive to throw away the ones she threw away. She said that it was a waste of electricity to put them in the refrigerator, so it was better to buy less and buy better ones. After trying several times to no avail, Meili figured it out: It was just a waste of money, not to mention that her mother-in-law was using her own money! In this way, Mei Li no longer has to worry about this matter. She said: Money can\’t buy you psychological comfort. As long as your mother-in-law is happy with the purchase, let her do it! My mother-in-law loves leftovers and is used to cooking five or six dishes for each meal, but she doesn\’t eat much. Maybe her original intention was to take good care of everyone, but the reality was that she couldn\’t eat that much at all, and there were a lot of leftover dishes at every meal. Meili lived in a rural area when she was a child, and her family often ate leftovers. She understood the frugal habits of the previous generation, but after being brainwashed by doctors and parenting books for so many years, she was used to not eating vegetables every other meal. Whenever she sees four or five leftovers plus three or four freshly cooked dishes on the table, Meili feels extremely stressed. I told my mother-in-law many times that eating vegetables every other meal contains nitrite, which is bad for the health, and asked her to cook less. However, the old man understood the truth, but still cooked a lot of vegetables habitually. Meili wanted to throw away the leftover vegetables, but her frugal mother-in-law firmly disagreed, \”If you don\’t eat it, I will.\” So her mother-in-law was busy eating the leftovers at every meal, and Meili and her husband couldn\’t stand it, so they had to help. Eat. For a while, Mei Li got up in the middle of the night and secretly dumped half of the leftovers to lighten everyone\’s burden. But one morning, when my husband saw the table full of dishes, he finally couldn\’t help but said: \”Mom, can\’t you cook a few less dishes? It will also save Meili from getting up in the middle of the night…\” After being remarked by the pig teammate After telling the truth, her mother-in-law did cook less food in the next few days, but it returned to the same level soon, and Meili was no longer embarrassed to put out food in the middle of the night. To this end, Meili had a new idea: she took the initiative to cook every meal herself. Meili said: The old man has eaten leftovers for most of his life. If you insist on asking her to throw away the leftovers, she will feel so distressed. The negative effects of this distress may be more serious than eating leftovers, so let her go. . Massaging feet without washing hands. Her mother-in-law said that there are many blood vessels in the feet, and more massage is good for the body. Meili also agrees with this, but she cannot accept that her mother-in-law massages the heels, soles and feet anytime and anywhere. Sometimes just after eating, she would put her feet on the chair and start massaging. Meili was busy feeding Tutu, and she hadn\’t even bothered to eat yet. What\’s more, my mother-in-law usually doesn\’t wash her hands after massaging her feet. Sometimes Tutu wants to have a snack, and her mother-in-law, who is massaging her feet, gets up and goes to get snacks for Tutu; sometimes when the food is served and her mother-in-law finishes the massage, she pulls the child directly to the dining table without washing her hands. Meili felt that this was simply challenging her bottom line. She had no choice but to greet her children before every meal: \”Tutu, it\’s time to eat, let grandma take you to wash your hands!\” Every time her mother-in-law handed Tutu snacks, Meili would say: \”Tutu, wash your hands before eating. Oh, although there is a packaging bag, you still have to pay attention to hygiene, otherwise the bacteria will be eaten in the stomach.\” Most of Meili\’s words were actually meant for her mother-in-law. Nowadays, the number of times her mother-in-law washes her hands after massaging her feet is increasing. . Meili said: If you ask the elderly to change a deep-rooted habit, you must have enough patience and take your time. Nowadays, conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have almost become a standard feature of modern families. Every day, people tell me about the pain of getting along with mother-in-law. And Meili’s story is simply a breath of fresh air. The differences between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law of this generation are perhaps greater than at any time in history. Because in just a few decades, people\’s lives have changed dramatically. The speed and extent of this change are unprecedented. Huge changes in living standards and lifestyles have led to changes in living habits. The young daughters-in-law quickly adapted to the new life and developed new habits, while the mothers-in-law were still stuck in the old times, retaining old ideas and habits, so conflicts were inevitable. Nowadays, women no longer marry from Zhangjiacun to Lijiazhai. More and more couples come from all over the world. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from all over the country gather together, every bite and every drink is different, it\’s strange that there is no contradiction! How can a woman in her forties or fifties be compatible with you in every possible way when she has never appeared in your first twenty or thirty years of life? Since you are destined to love the same man, you should have a grateful heart, see more of the other person\’s good qualities, see the concessions and efforts she has made to adapt to you, and then repay her with your concessions and efforts. . Seek common ground while reserving differences, be tolerant, have patience, have great wisdom, and have small skills, so that the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can be resolved day by day, so that she, you, and the family you love can all have an easier time.
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