A 28-year-old parent-child expert talks about the \”terminal disease\” of education. After reading this, I dropped out of 6 of my children\’s interest classes overnight.

On the fifth day of summer vacation, my daughter was sitting listlessly at her desk, begging me to give her a day off to relax. I thought she was looking for an excuse to play, so I refused. As a result, the daughter who couldn\’t solve the math problem actually hit her head on the table and banged her head desperately. She cried and said, \”My head is like paste, stuck and can\’t turn. It\’s so uncomfortable! Why?\” I still have to study for more than ten hours every day during the holidays, and I don’t even have time to breathe.” I couldn’t help but shudder when I saw my daughter in pain. Since the fifth grade, I have banned all time-wasting activities for her, including reading novels and learning to bake. In addition to school homework, I also bought a lot of papers for her, not only the pedagogical version, but also the Huanggang version and the Education Bureau version. I finally made it to graduation. I was worried that she wouldn\’t be able to keep up in junior high school, so I made a summer plan for her. Not only do they have to complete 2 sets of exercise books for each subject, but they also have to take 6 extracurricular classes: mathematics improvement classes from primary to junior high school, reading training classes, one-on-one English with foreign teachers, as well as calligraphy, dance, and thinking classes. Because I was afraid that my daughter would fall behind, I crazily squeezed my daughter\’s rest and entertainment time, hoping that she could spend all her time studying. But I have never thought about what this kind of high-intensity, non-stop chicken-blood education puts children in charge of? What has been lost? Ruining a child is to make him so busy that he has no time for entertainment. Two days ago, I accidentally came across a sharing by Zhang Min, a parenting expert. He has been engaged in education for 28 years and pointed out the \”terminal disease\” of many parents in education: they cannot see their children free. , resulting in children doing too little \”useless\” things. \”Children are people, not machines. When everything is filled up accurately every minute and every second, this person will have big problems.\” Yes, the biggest failure in education is to make children so busy that they don\’t even have time to look into the distance. Doing things that parents find “useful”. There is a girl named Xiao Li in \”Young Voice\”. She has been instilled with this value since she was a child: apart from studying, doing anything else is not doing her job properly. So she studies very hard and never dares to relax, let alone play. In order to catch up with her grades, she got up at 6 o\’clock every day and stayed until 10 o\’clock in the evening. Apart from eating, she studied all the time. Later, she often studied until two or three in the morning, and rarely slept for more than four hours. If you are overloaded with studying for a long time, your body will eventually be overwhelmed. She became sleepy all day long and wanted to learn, but could not get into it. She would vomit whenever she mentioned the pen. In severe cases, she fantasized about dying. Eventually, she suffered from anxiety and depression and had to stay home from school. Pathological busyness is actually much scarier than \”doing nothing\” in the true sense. The book \”The Rules of the Brain\” has long revealed the truth: the \”hard-working chicken baby\” method that many families believe in is not only useless, but will damage the child\’s brain and make his grades worse. Because of long-term non-stop study, the brain will be in a state of extreme hypoxia, and thinking will become slow. A child, at an age when he should be playing freely, has no entertainment and no freedom. He is left with only unstoppable learning and unbreakable pressure. He may be able to achieve temporary results and honors. But what is consumed is the child’s physical and mental healthand vitality. Only by allowing children to do \”useless\” things can they go further. Zheng Qiang, a well-known educator, said: Chinese children do not lose at the starting line, but fall tired at the starting line. Education should be about letting children continue to accelerate and run along the way. Allowing children to do \”useless\” things is actually providing acceleration for children. Blogger @birthday sister once shared her own experience. When she was a child, she often jumped up and down, lit firecrackers, dug holes and built houses, read various books, and played with many messy and imaginative things, but her parents never interfered with her because they took up her \”study\” time. Because she has accumulated a lot of experience in playing and experiencing, she can always think of the life scenes she has played and seen, and master the difficult and abstract concepts in books. For example, regarding various axioms of solid geometry, she immediately imagined a house made of mud to understand the points, lines and planes of this space. When the teacher talked about functions, she thought of the different times caused by moving cars at different speeds; the different landing points caused by different strengths of throwing paper airplanes; education cannot be quick and easy. For children, many things that we seem to be boring and useless actually contain various abilities that can benefit children throughout their lives. Looking at the top achievers in the college entrance examination every year, they are not children who study hard. On the contrary, no matter how busy they are with their studies, they have to find time to do some \”useless\” things. For example, Jiang Xinjie, who wrote the essay \”The Death of the Red Rabbit\” with a perfect score in the college entrance examination, has been fond of reading leisure books since he was a child. He is familiar with many classical novels such as \”The Romance of the Sui and Tang Dynasties\” and \”Guwen Guanzhi\”. These things that were considered \”useless\” by teachers and parents eventually inadvertently changed his fate that summer. Ding Runyang, the liberal arts top scorer in the Jiangsu Province College Entrance Examination, has loved playing Go since he was a child and is a \”Go Amateur Five Dan\” player. Because playing Go has cultivated his strong ability to resist frustration and his correct attitude towards gains and losses, he has always maintained a good attitude during exams. The growth of a flower requires not only soil, water and sunlight, but also time and space. The same goes for children. To accompany their children\’s growth, parents should appropriately let go of their attachment to \”usefulness\” and allow their children to do some useless things. Only in this way can children be relaxed, full of heart, and able to devote themselves to heavy studies with energy and concentration. Taking your children to do these things during the summer vacation is 100 times better than making up for extra lessons. There is a line in \”Little Shede\”: \”Education is not only responsible for children\’s present, but also responsible for their future lives.\” We ask children to study hard for He will be better able to gain a foothold in society in the future, but if a child\’s life is only filled with boring studies early on, it will be difficult for him to live a good life. Thinking of this, I dropped out of those interest classes that my daughter didn\’t like, and took advantage of the holidays to take my daughter to do a few \”useless\” things, so that she could have an outlet to release herself and regain her love for life. First thing: Playing with toys doesn’t necessarily lead to depression. Let the children get out of the textbooks, go out of the house, and give them a broad world, so that the children\’s physical and mental development can be better. 1. Before taking his children on a trip, a father went viral. In order to change his rebellious son who was tired of studying, his father decided to take his son on a trip. They started from Jiangsu and passed through Anhui, Hubei, Shaanxi and other places, riding a total of 9,000 kilometers. One day tripAfter traveling together at night, it not only improved the parent-child relationship, but also broadened the son\’s horizons and changed his views on learning. Take your children to travel and grow up on the road. This summer vacation, if possible, take your children out to see it. Only after seeing the vastness of the world and experiencing the various aspects of life can children be able to face the storms of life more calmly. 2. Take your children to climb mountains. \”Chinese model parent\” Liu Chenglian took her daughter to climb mountains every week when she was in elementary school. During the mountain climbing process, my daughter can not only appreciate flowers, plants and trees, but also observe animal activities, which fully mobilizes her observation, attention and thinking skills. In addition, the endless poetic and picturesque scenery along the way also adds luster to my daughter\’s composition. The process of successfully climbing to the top taught my daughter to persevere. Mountain climbing is actually just like learning. It is an arduous and long process that requires children to put in a lot of sweat and effort. But as long as you devote yourself to it and persevere, you will be rewarded with the most wonderful scenery. During the holidays, take your children out of the city prison, go hiking in the mountains, and enjoy the scenery. Only children with a rich heart can better fight against the sky and the distance. The second thing: Develop children’s useless hobbies. If learning is a power-consuming process, hobbies are recharging for children. Allowed to engage in things they like, children can not only be happy physically and mentally, but also stay full of energy. 1. Raise a small animal. A mother in Zhejiang shared the story of her 8-year-old daughter: her daughter wanted to raise a cat, and she promised that she would take good care of the cat before raising it. But she had no experience raising cats for the first time, and her daughter didn’t shovel poop for the cat for several days. The clean-loving cat disliked the smell of the cat litter, so she put her daddy in the cat’s bed. The girl cried because of the smell. But because she wanted to raise the cat, the girl had no choice but to break down and cry while holding her nose and shoveling the cat\’s poop. Research from Harvard University in the United States shows that keeping pets in the home can increase children\’s sense of responsibility by 20%. Raising a small animal can help children transform from being cared for to being caregivers, thereby better stimulating children\’s sense of responsibility, helping children understand their parents\’ difficulties and be grateful for their parents\’ efforts. 2. Learn a skill. There is a 10-year-old girl named Longlong online who has loved cooking food since she was a child. Moon cakes, tiramisu, cakes, breads, burgers…she has them all at her fingertips. As can be seen in the video, every time the girl cooks delicious food, she is always intoxicated, and her inner happiness and pride are beyond words. In life, many children are obsessed with some things, maybe baking, roller skating, drawing comics, playing the harmonica… These skills may not help children improve their grades, but they can bring them real happiness. These happy moments will become the light that will heal the children\’s lives in the future. The third thing: experience life. The knowledge in books widens the gap in scores. In all aspects of life, it widens the children\’s outlook and structure. 1. When the daughter of Yu Shiwei, the “number one Chinese management and education person” in the family, was ungrateful when she was a child, she often complained about her mother. He let his daughter be his family for the whole day: buying groceries, cooking, cleaning, washing clothes, washing dishes, and completing all the housework without leaving the floor. At the end of the day, not only did I exerciseThe daughter\’s hands-on ability also allows her to appreciate her mother\’s hard work and be grateful for her mother\’s efforts. The simplest growth and practice are hidden in the trivial housework. Letting children become a family is actually teaching them how to make a living and find love. 2. Set up a street stall. In life, many children spend money lavishly, eat too much and are too lazy to do anything. They don’t know how to consider the difficulty of making money for their parents. Letting your children set up a street stall during the summer vacation is a good opportunity. Only by experiencing it personally can he know what is hard-won. In Shijiazhuang, Hebei Province, four cousins ​​set up a stall to sell popsicles. On a sunny day, they were sweating profusely from the heat, but they still worked hard to sell popsicles. Although they only sold it for 70 or 80 yuan, they just recovered their original investment, but they realized that no matter how hard they worked, they reaped the rewards. During the long summer vacation, don’t let your children just bow their heads to study. Let them experience the hard work of making money firsthand, so that they can become sensible and understand the meaning of reading. The fourth thing: reading leisure books writer Wang Zengqi said: \”Reading leisure books has the following benefits: first, it is a good rest. Second, it can increase knowledge and understand the world. Third, you can learn languages. Fourth, From Xianshu, we can learn some principles of writing novels and essays. \”Yes, Xianshu is not \”idle\”, it is an important part of children\’s reading journey, allowing children to have a rich soul and experience a different kind of life.\” Let me share with you the summer reading list recommended by People’s Daily. Professor Gao Yunfeng of Tsinghua University said: \”For children, making good use of every winter and summer vacation is a good opportunity to fly against the wind. Letting children understand nature, society, and themselves is more meaningful than intensive learning. \”The biggest function of summer vacation is to allow children to temporarily escape from intensive study, relax and have fun. Click \”Like\” and let summer vacation be summer vacation and let children be children. Give time back to children and shine the sunshine of life on them, so that their future can be more dazzling.