A father’s outlook on life determines his child’s life

In the past two days, a video has gone viral on the Internet. The video is only 70 seconds long, has no plot and no dialogue, but it has been liked by millions of netizens. In Virginia, the United States, a father learned that his son was bullying a classmate. Without making any statement, he directly used a special method to severely punish his son. He ordered his son to run to school for a week without stopping, regardless of the weather, and he would check in live on Facebook every day. From the video, we can see that this 10-year-old boy bullied his classmates on the school bus. The driver kicked him off and informed him that he was not allowed to ride the school bus for three days. After the father learned about it, he did not argue with the school, nor did he drive his son to school. Instead, he asked his son to run to school by himself. Although the school only punished him for three days, his father insisted that he run to school for seven consecutive days. So, in the next seven days, the child who made the mistake had to carry his schoolbag and run to school on foot every day. After the punishment was over, the child suddenly became more sensible, no longer bullied his classmates, and was even praised by the teacher. At the end of the video, the father said that parents cannot always educate their children as friends, but sometimes they have to teach their children as parents. Educator Zhang Haitao said: A parent is a living person, a role model, and a hero that children can see and touch. For children, whether the father has a clear sense of truth directly affects the values ​​​​the child develops. The father\’s three views also determine the child\’s lifelong conduct. In family education, the father is a big tree and the children are the fruits on the tree. Rather than using all the energy to protect the fruits, it is more important for the tree itself to become stronger. If the foundation of a big tree is not stable, the fruits it bears will not be abundant. A few days ago, the father of actress Tong Liya denounced netizens angrily on Weibo. The incident was once pushed to the top of the hot search list, and the popularity has not dissipated yet. The reason was that a netizen posted a post, wondering why actress Tong Liya is so talented and good-looking, but why she is always not confident? One netizen replied: She was born in a despicable family, and the first man she met was her straight cancer father. This comment sparked heated discussions among netizens, but Tong Liya’s father showed up and cursed: I wish your father’s oral cancer will get better soon. Indeed, as netizens said, Tong Liya\’s father is a man with extremely unhealthy views and strong feudal patriarchal ideas. Because she is a girl, Tong Liya has never received love from her father since she was born. She wanted to get into Nortel with her own efforts, but was ridiculed by her father. After marrying Chen Sicheng, the first thing her father told her was to be a peaceful wife and serve her parents-in-law well. When Chen Sicheng cheated, he advised the media not to talk nonsense, and even hinted that Tong Liya should be patient. Under the influence of a severe straight male cancer and a feudal patriarchal father, Tong Liya has a timid temperament. Although she has a brilliant career, she often lacks a sense of security. It was precisely because of her father\’s wrong ideas that Tong Liya chose to remain silent in the face of Chen Sicheng\’s cheating. Child psychologist Dobson said in the book \”Raising Daughters\”: A child\’s self-worth and self-confidence are directly related to her relationship with her father. Every growing child is a blank sheet of paper, and the father is the one who determines the pattern in the child\’s heart. A father with incorrect views is a blocker in the growth of his children., blocking the integrity of the child\’s personality, and being a destroyer, urging the child to go astray. There is a little girl in fourth grade in Utah, USA, named Kelly. One day, Kelly\’s teacher came to the house and said that Kelly was a bully on campus. She often laughed at a female classmate whose family was poor and could not afford new clothes. After listening to what the teacher said, his father thought that Kelly had bad conduct and didn\’t even give others the respect they deserved. He decided to teach his daughter a lesson she would never forget. He took his daughter to a second-hand store and told her: Find the ugliest and shabbiest clothes and put them in the shopping cart. Kelly was confused and helped her father pick out the \”ugliest clothes.\” After a while, the shopping cart was full, but she had no idea what her father was up to. Two days later, Kelly wore the clothes to school. She felt terrible and many of her classmates laughed at her. (At her father\’s request, Kelly wore ugly clothes to school.) From then on, she never laughed at anyone again. A father with a correct outlook on life is subtle in shaping his children\’s thinking, but when his children make mistakes, he can directly bring them back on track. I remember a vacation in college when I took a train from Hefei back to Fuyang. Because I didn’t have a ticket, I had to buy it in Huainan first, then get on the train and then pay for it. But no one cared about me after I got on the train, and the conductor didn\’t care either. I wanted to pay for the fare, but I thought since no one was checking, why not evade the fare, so I sat all the way home. After returning home, I proudly told my father that I had saved 20 yuan by taking the train to evade fares. After hearing this, my father became furious and scolded me. When I learned that I couldn\’t make up for it, my father deducted 300 yuan from my living expenses for the next month as punishment. In the next month, because I had no money, I ate instant noodles for a week. That unforgettable experience made me never do anything opportunistic again. Yu Hongmin said: It is difficult for us to find a child with elegance and purity in a vulgar family. Children will always make mistakes when they grow up, but having a father with upright views can help his children avoid detours or even the wrong path. A father with an upright outlook is like a guidepost on the road to growth for his children, pointing out the direction when they are confused. He is also like a compass, pulling his children back on track in a timely manner. Writer Li Yueliang once told the story of her friend Da Guang. Daguang was originally a top student, but his father had a strong \”bureaucratic mentality\” and believed that all efforts were ultimately for \”making money as an official.\” His father never asked him about his grades, only asked him if he was a cadre on duty, never asked him how many friends he had, only how many \”connections\” he had, never asked him about his hobbies, and explained to him the dark side of officialdom all day long. study. Under the influence of his father, Daguang also regarded pursuing an official career as his life goal. However, Daguang\’s communication skills are average and he has no leadership skills. It took him 4 years to pass the civil service exam and he worked at the grassroots level for another 8 years without being promoted. Seeing his former subordinates being promoted while he was still at the bottom, Daguang suffered from severe depression and relied on taking medicine every day to sleep. One day, Daguang will understand that the root cause of all the detours he has taken lies in his father\’s wrong ideas. In a family, the father is the role model for the child, and the father\’s pattern determines the height that the child can reach in the future. The father is also the child\’sThe life model and father\’s ideas determine the conduct of the child throughout his life. Krupskaya said: \”For parents, family education is first of all self-education.\” For fathers, if they want to give their children a good education, they must first have good conduct. A father who does not distinguish between right and wrong will definitely not be able to raise children who know the truth; a father who does not know good from evil will definitely not be able to raise children with good conduct. As Suhomlinsky said: \”Every father is a messenger. Only if the messengers study improperly and correct their own concepts and conduct, can the children they cultivate can stand on their own among the crowd.\”