After watching this video, will you dare to say dirty words to your children again?

As mothers, we all want to maintain a gentle and virtuous image in front of our children, but there will always be times when we can\’t hold ourselves back and lose our temper in front of our children, yell, or even say some bad and hurtful things. The popular American talk show \”Jimmy Show\” once conducted a street survey and randomly asked children, \”What is the worst thing your mother has said?\” The children\’s innocent and childish words made people want to laugh, but After laughing, it also makes us think deeply. ↓↓↓Let’s take a look at the interview video first↓↓↓One type of answer is: Another type of answer is: There is a little boy in red wearing Spider-Man in the video. The worst thing his mother said was \”Children, I try I want to communicate with you properly. Can you be quiet?\” Frankly speaking, this sentence is not that bad, is it? The editor thinks that he will grow up to be a happy boy, because he will not have to face harsh words from his parents. 1. Verbal insults will change the structure of children\’s developing brains. Children\’s brains are developing and have not yet been finalized. Their ability to regulate verbal violence is far worse than that of adults. Dr. Martin Teicher of Harvard Medical School found that verbal insults can cause \”damage\” to children\’s brains. The brain areas most likely to be affected by verbal violence are the corpus callosum (the area mainly responsible for transmitting motivational, sensory and cognitive information between the two brain hemispheres), the hippocampus (the brain area responsible for managing emotions), and the prefrontal lobe (the area responsible for thinking and decision-making). brain region). When the environment is full of stress and needs are often deprived, the human brain switches to \”survival mode\” in order to adjust its state to adapt to the environment. Children\’s brains are still developing. If they always live in an environment of harshness, lack, and poverty, their brains will develop into a \”survival mode\” structure in order to adapt to the environment. This is why we see some people who were poor in childhood and whose families were unhappy. Even if their living environment has improved greatly as adults, it is difficult for them to change their thinking patterns. Many people are still as cautious, timid and stingy as in the past. , tend to please others, hide in corners hoping not to be noticed, etc. 2. Verbal attacks will make children have lower self-esteem. Many adults also have such an experience. When some negative events occur, their brains will have thoughts similar to \”I am not good enough, so good things will not happen to me\”, or \” Bad things will happen to me because I\’m good for nothing\” and so on. These people just have \”internalized criticism\” in their brains. As a child continues to receive information from the outside world as he grows up, he will also internalize his parents\’ evaluation of him into a kind of self-evaluation. If a child always faces harsh criticism and criticism from the outside world when growing up, the negative side of their personality will be nourished and continue to grow. This kind of internalized criticism often exists in a child\’s brain. It will appear when he does certain things or evaluates himself. It is a bit like talking to himself, but it is full of denial and criticism of himself, which will make a person Become more inferior. Therefore, children who are often criticized harshly, even if the person who criticized them no longer exists when they become adults, they will change this person\’s attitude towards him into their own attitude towards themselves, and they will often be harsh on them.Blame yourself. 3. Intentional emotional harm has a longer-lasting effect. When we feel that someone has the intention to hurt me intentionally, the inner pain will be doubled. Deliberate insults can do more harm to a person than unintentional ones. If a child is often verbally attacked and belittled by his parents, even if these words may sound like just a \”taunt\”, the harm to the child will be very serious. By the way, a reminder to parents with older children at home, if you find that your children are being subjected to continuous verbal insults from the outside world, such as classmates, teachers, brothers and sisters, etc., as a parent, you must intervene immediately to make them stop doing this. Do, because it\’s not that much different than beating your child over and over again. If you don’t want your child to carry a “damaged” brain structure into adulthood, don’t use “violent language” to hurt him as he grows up. Being a parent who can talk well to your children is better than giving them any gifts.